The Importance of Secrecy
by Lunatic with a Hero Complex
Summary: Robin has no problems,he is fine,there is no reason for concern. That is, until that world dissolves into the truth. Can Raven show him that even superheroes need help. If she can even get him to stop interrupting her.
1. In the heart or in the head

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter One

By: Lunatic With a Hero Complex

Masks are a thing of wonder, they cover such a small space, but they encase an entire personality. They bottle it into such an existence that only the person behind the mask knows the truth of it. Swings of a bo-staff, or the way a bird-a-rang is flung may give hints. Small glimpses of certain aspects of a mind. But whole chambers of conciousness remain unknown to outsiders. They stay unexplored and untainted by human eyes.

It could be lonely, and at times, the missing familiarity stung in one of those unvisited chambers. But when your head was unpopular with dangerous people of a certain moral ambiguity, it helped that they didn't know what color your eyes were. When it came down to it, he supposed it was the lesser of two evils. You collapse with a defeated, albeit relieved, sigh into the safe circle of friends you have grown to love and allow them to know you, or you could make do with your own comforting and protect those friends from an eyeless standpoint.

It was choices such as this when he missed Gotham. Longed for the understood law of confidentiality between himself and his mentor. The lack of pressure to reveal your face and your last pinch of advantage. Both were anonymous, and neither cared.

Now that the new debate had broken out in the Tower, the line between abandon and friendship he had been tightrope walking had begun to shake and threaten to spill him off the side.

Every hour that he was in their presence and not fighting crime, the questions began. All of them there and subtly yet blatantly presenting questions that aspired to shatter his facade. "Robin, dude, like when do you wash that eye mask, its gotta get sweaty." "Yes, friend Robin, its odor must surely be pungent, perhaps if you wished, I could cleanse it for you." "Man, that thing's gotta be dangerous in battle, the glass could break."

All of them, except Raven. She'd helped him begin the Titans, both of them starting out with a truckload of things they didn't know about each other. She, at least, did not seem interested in coercing him out of the eyemask. "Seem" being the key word.

One night, when coming down for a glass of water when he couldn't sleep, he'd been stopped in the hall by the sound of his name in a heated conversation, "Dude, Cy that's ridiculous, of course Robin's got eyes, his aim with those funny discs is too good for him not to."

He'd caught Beast Boy's mid-adolescent tone and stopped to listen to the response. Cyborg had spoken next, "Okay, man I'll admit the eye thing was far fetched, but I do wonder what color they are." Here, Starfire's voice had joined in, "I believe that Robin's eyes are blue, like the skin of a gulnark."

A brief silence pierced the air and then Starfire continue, "What of you Raven, what color do you think friend Robin's eyes are. We are most interested in your input."

Robin expected with all certainty to hear her preach to them in a deadpan voice about how his identity was his to keep or reveal, but instead, he'd heard her voice waft out of the kitchen timidly, "I would guess they were hazel, or maybe brown." She'd said it conversationally, like she was interested as much as they were.

From that moment, he'd known his mask wasn't safe.

So now, as he sat on the roof the Tower, the metal soles of his boots dangling off of the side, he wondered if the secrecy was worth it.

Sighing, he shoved the thought out of his mind and simultaneously shoved himself off of the ledge of the Tower. For a few seconds, he let himself fall, enjoying the feel of the wind. Then, he turned and shot out a grappling hook . It caught on the edge of the roof and he was jerked to a stop in midair. Pushing the retract button, he let it draw him back towards the ledge.

When he got close enough, he pushed up and off, flipping on the way and landing on the rooftop in a fighting stance. Extending his bo-staff, he went into practicing his techniques, alternating swipes and swings with the staff with roundhouse kicks and punches.

The anger built up inside of him, the anger that made him fight every day, and his swipes grew more forceful and his kicks more fierce.

He didn't like not being able to be open and free with his emotions like the others did. He didn't like being the voice of reason when the others were deep into chaos of excitement or fear. And he certainly didn't like not having the option of falling back into arms of people he trusted. But he was the leader of this team, and he was responsible for them. That being as it was, he certainly wasn't going to abandon them to just any fate for the sake of his own mental well being. It was fruitless, pointless, and dangerous. If he were to do such a thing, what kind of leader would he be. The truth was, he wouldn't be one at all, and that, he supposed was what stung the most.

You couldn't allow your own problems to get in the way of your duties, as revealing his identity and showing the true color of his personality surely would.

Gods could not be fair in creating orders in the universe, you were never allowed more than one or two pleasures at a time. You couldn't have your cake and eat it too, you couldn't have love and keep it, you couldn't keep people safe and be comforted.

All of this, Robin had gone over many times in his head, he knew each side of the argument by heart, but yet, he still fought it with himself. When he was alone, studying the criminal trail of Slade, the thought would pop into his head. When he was training all alone in the gym, he'd lose focus and start to think about the possibility. When he took his R-cycle out of the garage and went for a ride in the city, his hands went on autopilot, and his thoughts would trail to the life he hid behind the two white ovals over his eyes. These days, Robin couldn't escape his worst enemy, the boy he used to be.

Letting the anger build, Robin didn't notice it had grown dark until an arm stopped him on the shoulder. Out of instinct, he turned around and raised a hand to bring it down in a sharp, swift hit on the neck of the intruder. The hand stopped mere inches from the pale and slender neck of Raven.

Robin stood there panting, eyemask wide. Raven didn't bat an eye, "Its raining, I thought you should know."

His concious mind leaked back, and now he could feel the drops hitting his skin and he could feel the wetness of his costume. He regained his composure, and became once more, the leader all of them was accustomed to seeing, "Thanks Raven, I was just finishing up, I'll be down in a minute." Raven shrugged and turned around, "Alright, just don't blame me if you get sick."

She headed back towards the door of the roof, and she didn't look back as she spoke. Robin watched her exit and he allowed himself to marvel at how close he'd come to knocking Raven out. Turning around, he went back to his practice, ignoring the increasing wetness, not noticing the figure that stood just under the overhang over the door to the roof. Watching him swing and punch and occasionally, shout.

* * *

Raven came up to the roof about 10 minutes after Robin. She'd come out and seen him sitting on the ledge, lost in his own thoughts and she'd thought nothing of it. Not caring if he noticed her presence or not, she sat about twenty feet away and began to meditate. But she hadn't been able to get into the spirit required to do such. Every time she would begin to find her center, her eyes would slit open and she would catch a glimpse of Robin sitting there, staring out into the light of the city, and every thing would topple over again.

A loud sigh brought her out of her latest attempt and she looked over, only to gasp. As she watched, Robin vaulted himself off of the building, falling to what would certainly mean one less member of the Titans. Dropping from her position she'd leaned over the ledge, raising her hands to use her power, when she'd been stopped mid chant. The Boy Wonder had turned around mid-air and shot a grappling hook up towards the building. She watched as he saw it make contact and pushed the button.

His body had risen fast through the space he'd fallen and Raven silently cursed him. He'd gotten her worked up over absolutely nothing. He hadn't been committing impromptu suicide, he'd been training.

Robin kicked off of the side of the Tower and rose in a glittering arc over the ledge to land on his feet, crouched in a fighting position with his back to her.

Immediately extending his staff, he'd gone into an imaginary battle, fighting demons she'd probably never see. Forsaking any attempt at meditation, she'd hovered in place and watched him progress through the motions. His mouth was twisted into a grimace. A mark of either pain or anger, empath that she was, she couldn't tell. It had always been hard for her to read Robin. He worked so hard so that no one could read him in any way. Nice and polite, he became vicious when needed on the turn of a dime.

Watching as his eyemask worked as he did, she brought the question to her mind that was becoming more frequent in her thoughts with each passing day. What color were the optics underneath those white ovals. Something told her that they were hazel, or brown. She didn't know why, he just seemed like the kind of boy to have brown eyes. _Boy_, the word struck her as she thought it. It sounded different than when you said Boy Wonder. Boy Wonder had some sort of respect to it. When you just said boy, it sounded much younger. But yet, it was the truth. This... male, could end the lives of men, he could destroy mastermind criminals of increasing danger, and he could swing a mean Bo-staff, but he was still only sixteen years old. He wasn't even old enough to vote yet and still he led a group of superheroes, in a stoic manner that didn't waver.

He was the rock that they all turned to to keep them together, and he probably wasn't even sure who he was going to be yet.

Steadily, Raven noticed that he became more volatile. Killing off imaginary enemies in a lawnmower whir of color. She was astonished at how graceful he seemed about it. Sure, he looked strangely powerful when standing for a sixteen year old, but still, he didn't seem like the type who fought like water. The movement of his arms was fluid and smooth. He didn't pause in between attacks and he rotated as though he were on a pivot.

Out of all the Titans, she' d known Robin the longest, and he her. But considering that, he hardly knew anything about her. And the things she knew about him could fill up a basket. Not to mention, most of the knowledge she had was shared with the others. There were tidbits that were exclusive to her, but nothing that would unravel the mystery of the illusive boy wonder.

Sitting there watching him, the sun set behind her. Soon after, raindrops began to fall, splattering on the concrete and dying swift, painless deaths. He didn't seem to notice that anything had changed and he went on fighting off illusive attackers, kicking water now as well as air. Thinking that it wouldn't be good if their leader ended up with a headcold, she decided to make him aware of the condition of the weather.

Floating up behind him and touching down, she lightly touched his shoulder. Internally, she was shocked when he spun around and raised a hand. He brought it down swiftly and in her head she prepared to be knocked down, but the hand stopped at her neck as he realised who it was.

The whites in his eyemask widened and he stood there panting, looking at her as though she were a ghost. He seemed frightened and lost in a world she couldn't enter. Raven should know the look, she felt it all the time.

Watching him compose himself, she held true to her persona and deadpanned him a sentence, "It's raining, I thought you should know."

He changed right before her eyes, he grew in stature, and became the person that she saw every day, keeping them together, "Thanks Raven, I was just finishing up, I'll be down in a minute."

Turning, and feeling anything but stoic, she headed towards the door, "Alright, just don't blame me if you get sick."

She heard him turn back to his work and when she got to the door, instead of going in, she stood in the shadows, out of the rain, watching him.

He lost himself in the fight again and every turn of his body,and every lift of his leg seemed a defiance to Gods she couldn't understand, and didn't care about.

What she did care about was that in his own way, Robin seemed to be scooting in on what was her persona territory. Lately, silent and short, he came down for breakfast, ate lunch, briefed them on cases, trained, and slept.

Raven rather guessed that the subtle administrations of the others questions, trying with increasing desperation to root out the remaining secrets of the young bird, were tolling on him, angering him maybe, but probably just making him uncomfortable.

She watched him for another thirty minutes. The rain increasing steadily until it was a full out downpour. She didn't mind the weather, it was somewhat peaceful.

He stopped suddenly, just in the middle of a kick his leg lowered and he stood there in the rain, the red and green spandex thoroughly soaked everywhere. She could see the rapid motion of his chest as he caught his breath and was just fixing to turn and go, guessing that he had finished, when she was stopped.

He sank onto the wet concrete of the roof. His knees were raised in front of him, about a foot apart and his elbows rested on them. In his hands, was his head.

A gloved hand ran through the black hair, now dripping with rain water.

He looked up and out at the peaceful city.

Raven watched this and waited to see what he was going to do.

Before she had even begun to register what he was doing, the eyemask was coming off.


	2. All the wrong buttons

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter Two

By: Lunatic With a Hero Complex

Raven gasped and was thankful that only the rain could hear her. Sitting before her, on the wet roof of Titan's Tower was a maskless Robin. He still wore his costume, the R still stood proudly on his chest. But, for the first time in what she assumed was years, there were no white ovals over the eyes of the Boy Wonder. Raven fought the strong urge to cover her eyes and instead, squinted through the rain at his uncovered face. It seemed so naked without the mask.

She only wanted to see one thing, one thing and she would probably leave him in his secrecy. What color were his eyes?

Squinting even harder to see, she gasped at the sight that met her.

One eye, the left one, was a vibrant green, like emeralds. The other, the right one, was a deep and inviting brown. The eyes were the same shape, and same height up his face on each side, but they were nowhere near the same color.

A two-tone gaze set inside strong bone structure. His cheek bones, it turned out, were smoothly contrasted to the angles of his face. They set the framework for the flesh around his eyes just right. He was handsome, she'd never had a doubt about that, but it shone through more clearly when there was no mask to hide it.

He rubbed his hand across his eyes, probably dispelling the sweat that came from wearing it so constantly. It had to get uncomfortable eventually. It was strange though, that he had chosen to remove it at this opportune moment. From what the boys said, he didn't even remove it to shower. This information gathered from the locker room at the training field.

Holding the mask in his hand, Raven was thrown by the disgusted way he looked at it. Judging from his religious fervor when it came to his identity, he acted like it was his best friend, a confidant that witheld all of his secrets. But maybe, she thought, it wasn't a confidant at all, but a self created prison. A secret that was only a secret for the betterment of the public in general.

He brought the mask up to his eyes again and reached around to tie it in the back. He stood up and turned to pick up his staff, once again the leader that she had appointed when they began this team. Taking the opportunity, she went through the door, hoping he wouldn't realise that she had been there when he inadvertantly answered her burning question. She saved time by floating down the stairs and took a harsh right into the main room where she then took a left and went down the hall towards the elevator.

Stopping, she turned around back into the main room to pick up her book. Raven then hurried back down the hall towards the elevator again. She pushed the down button and waited impatiently, or as impatient as she got, for the door to open. When it did, she stepped in with a sigh of relief. She was reaching for the button with her floor number on it while the doors closed when a green glove shot through the opening and pushed them back open.

Robin stepped into the elevator car and nodded at her as he too reached his hand for the button, "Thanks for waiting." Her mental eyes shot open in shock and she fumbled internally for something to say, on the outside, she said nothing, and her expression didn't change. But his next words calmed her fears somewhat, "I always hate waiting for the car when I've just missed it."

Raven let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding and just responded, "No problem."

They got off on the same floor as their rooms were one door apart. Robin turned off to the right first, opening the door to his room citing, "See ya later Raven." and disappearing behind a sliding door emblazoned with a large T.

She paused briefly and kept going until she reached her door, also stamped with the T, but still having a somewhat darker aura. Opening the door, she entered the cool darkness of her room and sat on the bed. Her mind was still stumbling over what she had just seen and it refused to jump the hurdle and continue on merrily, or in relative good spirits anyway.

Deciding that the best cure for her mental confusion was to meditate and put all of her thoughts in line, she went over to the dresser on the far left and retrieved her mirror. Settling herself with some brand of relaxation on the bed, she stared into the hand mirror and felt herself disappear.

Inside her mind, was chaos. On the base, things were fine. The road of her conciousness still stretched out interminably into the darkness of her subconcious. But her subconcious and concious were blazoned with the same images. Everywhere she turned there were eyes, not just any eyes, no. A green eye and a brown eye, each of them staring into the space of her subconcious. All of her emotions were staring goggily at them.

Happiness, that pink horror, was giggling madly at one set. Bravery was standing up straight with her hands on her hips, as if to show that some pair of eyes didn't frighten her. Intelligence, in her yellow garb and specs, was circling a pair of the optics, looking curiously at the mismatched colors. Timidity was hiding behind bravery and staring fearfully at a pair that was staring straight at her. All in all, things were not in order in the slightest since. A new invader had taken over her mind, and the saddest part was, it had her permission.

Growing tired of the carnival like atmosphere, the blue Raven, the real Raven, raised her hands gracefully and flicked them. Immediately, all of the eyes, came rushing together to form one large set. Gesturing once more, a clear box appeared out of thin air. Lowering her fingers, the pair of eyes lowered into the box, which she quickly sealed. She wasn't imprisoning them, just containing them for observation.

Grabbing the box out of thin air, she inspected them closely. She knew why her mind was in a flurry over them, it was a secret that no one anywhere really knew. Apparently, not even batman had ever seen Robin's eyes. The only people that had seen them it seemed were now dead or gone to a place where they couldn't tell anyone.

All of her emotions had gathered around her when she contained the distraction and were now staring at them along with her. Intelligence peered closely into the depths of the clear container, "How is such a combination genetically possible?" Bravery looked suspiciously at them, "Do you think they can be trusted." Laziness looked at them as though they were pestering her, "Do we have to worry about it?" Happiness was still giggling madly, "Aren't they so cute? Youuuuuuu know, they are quite fetching." At that, every single emotion stared up at her and the blue Raven positively burned a hole through her gladder side, "No more of that, do you hear, or I'll send you to time out."

Happiness pouted and nodded her head, "O.K., just stating the obvious."

Raven returned to her observations responding, "If it was obvious, than you shouldn't have to state it."

The eyes had taken to staring at the true Raven alone, and she was beginning to get somewhat unsettled by their singularity of position. To make herself more comfortable, she placed the face and hair to accompany it. Ruffled black locks fell into place above them, and around them, there was the beginning of a sharp chin, and sloping cheeks.

The face materialized and now, instead of the usual Robin that appeared when she thought about her friends, there was this one, maskless and interesting.

Placing the box back in the air she sent it to a location on her conciousness that she kept her prominent thoughts. It wasn't exactly a shelf, but the principle was similar. The thoughts were placed according to prominance. They were in a corral type structure that kept them in. When she wanted to think about one of them, all she had to do was pluck the one she wanted and set it in front of her. Simple.

Turning to her emotions now that she had contained and neutralized the distraction, she gestured for them all to get in their usual circle. "Just because something different happened today does not mean we can slack off from our meditation, now everyone, together."

Grumbling slightly, the group of emotions gathered in a circle and joined hands, the real Raven taking the empty place in between the bright green robe of jealousy and the dark green robe of bravery.

Holding hands, they all began to chant and Raven felt her mind slip into its center with a resounding figurative mental click. "Azaroth, Metrion, Zinthos. Azaroth, Metrion, Zinthos. Azaroth, Metrion, Zin..." They all continued chanting losing track of the tick of seconds and the passing of time. The only measurement they were aware of was the navigation of the landscape of her mind.

* * *

Two hours later, Raven was jarred out of her meditation by the sound of Beast Boy's voice through her door, "Raven, come on man, we're hungry, and we're waiting on you to start dinner." She fell on her bed with a thump and an angry scowl, at the moment the only outstanding thoughts on her mind were the pictures of herself strangling the little green elf. The idea pleased her, but she knew it wasn't his fault, he'd been sent up hear by the more boisterous members of the Titans.

Grumbling to herself about solitude and gritting her teeth, she monotoned, "I'll be out in a minute, go ahead and start." She heard the patter of his feet as he ran back down the hall towards the elevator and she sighed to herself, honestly, how could that little of a being eat so much food.

Exiting the opening elevator doors, she went into the kitchen to get a plate of whatever dish Cyborg had concocted, as it was his turn to cook. She didn't show it, but she did like Cyborg's cooking. He made it good, and he made it adaptable. His food fit any eating type. Cyborg didn't cook Tofu, but he did make vegetarian dishes for his "little green buddy" and he made them colorful for Starfire's pleasure. He made it lighter for Raven's tastes, as he knew she didn't like greasy foods. The only Titan that his food was not adapted to, it seemed, was Robin. And the only reason that was, was because he couldn't figure out what Robin liked and didn't like. The Boy Wonder ate everything (except Tofu, and Starfire's puddings) with the same manner.

He didn't turn his nose up at any meal, nor did he gobble anything with great fervor. He placed a moderate portion in front of him, ate it and smiled while placeing the plate in the sink for that night's dishwasher. It was almost as if he was afraid of letting them know any personal facts about him.

Nonetheless, she didn't let thoughts about her team member interrupt her meal. Of course, she wasn't exactly a fountain of jocularity on any occasion, but she didn't want to seem more preoccupied than usual.

Tonight, Cyborg had made stirfry, and of course it was wonderfully made. The broccoli, carrots, and rice were tender and steamy. With a dash of soy sauce, each bite was heaven. Each member was chewing happily and talking, while occasionally stopping to make comments on Cyborg's excellent culinary abilities.

Each member, except of course, Robin. He ate it with willingly enough, but he didn't go back for seconds, nor did he gobble it. It was strange how methodical he was, while still managing to exchange laughter and jokes with the other members. It wasn't obvious to the busy eye, but for one who was in a constant state of silence, it showed a deep contrast.

Raven watched him while he ate. He complimented the food, and he laughed at Beast Boy's jokes, but he still didn't seem to be excited in the area of his hands while he steadilly, but surely finished off the vegetables.

When everyone had cleaned their plates and were sitting around leaned back in their chairs, the old debate resumed again. "Robin, man, how do we know you're not the spawn of a millionaire." Beast Boy's eyes got round,"Duuuuuuude, that's how you afford all those gadgets, you're filthy rich."

Robin, his eyemask squinted in a look of severe dislike with the conversation, could not suppress a chuckle in spite of himself, "I am many things B.B, but I am not rich. Not in any meaning of the word."

Beast boy hopped on the table and flailed his arms around, "Then who are you, inquiring minds want to know, who is the man, er boy, er Titan, behind the mask?"

Robin smirked bitterly and stood up to take his plate to the sink, "All you need to know, is that my name is Robin, I am your friend, and I am your teammate, and I am the leader of the Teen Titans. Past that, nothing really matters."

Cyborg let his mouth hang open in a stupified gape, "Man, does your own mother even know what you look like under there?"

From the moment the words left the metal man's mouth, Raven knew he'd said the wrong thing. Robin's mouth went from slightly playful to a thin closed line.  
What they could see of his face was pure poker. Nothing but mask. He turned from the sink and said in a voice that was a joke in forced cordiality, "I'm going to go to bed, we've got a search for Slade to continue tomorrow. Don't stay up too late, I want you all to be fresh."

He walked out of the kitchen, his spine frozen in a stiff column and any casual gate in the way he walked was lost in the area of the kitchen. They all were silent, and when they heard the elevator door slide shut with a finalizing hiss a beat came before the talking began again. "Awwww Cy, now we'll never get anything outta him."

"I didn't know saying that would knock him off the talking horse." Cyborg raised his hands in utter defense and looked up at Beast Boy, who had not yet come down from his perch on the table.

Starfire looked concernedly towards the door to the hallway through which Robin had left, "Robin did not seem to be in the spirits of jocularity, what do you suppose has put him in the dumps of the downing?"

Raven didn't understand why the comment had set off the masked hero, but she did know that their continued debate on the subject wasn't helping, "Just drop the subject guys, he'll never answer and if we keep talking about it and trying to make him tell us, all we are going to do is anger him. We all know how he fights when he's angry. So. just. drop. it."

Putting her plate on top of Robin's in the sink, she walked out into the hallway once more following in Robin's footsteps. It was odd that they were the only two Titans on their floor. Sure the place was huge, but the others were crowded together on the same floor as Cyborg's lab.

When she thought about it, she supposed it was subconcious. When they had first moved in here, the only other person beside themselves had been the android and he'd had a lab for a bedroom. So, bunching together for safety purposes, they'd put their rooms on the same floor,pretty close together. And there they had remained ever since.

Raven wasn't planning on moving. He never bothered her, and she didn't mind having him there. In fact, it made assembling easier. Raven rose in the elevator and exited the doors.

* * *

Sitting on his bed, Robin felt rather numb. The questions made him uncomfortable, but none yet had bombed so near to the home zone. Then, cold fingers began to crack the numbness. Fingers so cold they were hot. He could feel the anger now. It baked his head and threatened to tear him apart if he didn't obey.

Standing up, he began to throw things off of his desk. He chunked pens at the wall. He lobbed his lamp at an enlarged picture of Jump City. The glass smashed and he watched with sick fascination as the shards glittered and landed on the floor.

Walking over to the landing zone, he knelt and picked up one of the largest jagged pieces.

Sitting there, on his knees, watching the light in his room glitter off of the faceted edges of the glass shard.

Thoughts upbraided his mind. Twisting his perception and drowning his will.

He wasn't a leader. He was a danger. He would give in. He would tell them. And then, his friends would die because he was weak. A worthless boy.

Pulling the glove off his left hand with his right, he laid it on his leg. Picking up the shard, he gripped it tightly and raised it over his wrist, point glittering as though it held a secret.

It would be safer if he was gone. But worthless or not, he would be master of his own destiny.

Bringing the edge down, he drug it across his wrist, leaving a open crying gash. The pain bit at him and gnawed at his brain stem, but he ignored it and stared at the blood that was seeping down the sides of his wrist. Standing up and stumbling slightly at the rapid loss of blood, Robin made his way to his bed and lifted up the pillow. His bo-staff was there, placed so that he could reach it while he slept.

He gripped it and extended it, dripping his life across the sheets. Then, turning to the desk he'd wrecked, he opened the top drawer and took out a picture. A black haired woman with bright green eyes stared at him, smiling foolishly at the infant toddling near her knees in colorful clothes fit for the offspring of the trapeze artists at the circus.

His thumbs smeared blood over the infants features and Robin sunk back to the ground, his vision behind the mask growing fuzzy. He was having trouble seeing the woman. He lifted a weak hand and clawed frustratedly at the mask, leaving the extended bo-staff in his lap. The rapidly receding Boy Wonder succeeded in pushing it over his hair to slump on the floor behind him.

The hand fell exhaustedly to pick up the staff again. He was going to go out looking at the two things he'd trusted most in his life. Blackness slipped into the edges of his two-tone gaze. He fought to keep his eyes open and he was losing. Finally, he let them slip close and the world went black.


	3. Door fetishes

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter Three

By: Lunatic with a Hero Complex

It was a lucky brand of fate that guided Raven that evening. She was passing Robin's room on the way to her own. A loud crash made it through the barrier of Robin's door and Raven stopped in her path. Another louder crash came and she became concerned with the sudden silence that followed. Usually, she'd dismiss it to Robin's clumsiness, as rare as it was, and continue on. But something made her hesitate.

For a few minutes, she stood outside the door, her hand poised to knock. If he was alright, he'd open the door and she'd have to make up a story or admit that she was concerned. But on the other hand, if he was in trouble, these minutes could mean life and death.

That decided it. She knocked. No response. She tried again. Once more, no response.

Growing worried, she tried to open the door. It was locked. In desperation, she raised her wrists, said her three words, and flung the door into it's cavity in the wall. She ran into the room and looked frantically about, searching for Robin. She didn't see anything out of order until her eyes glanced upon the bed. Blood stained the white sheets.

Rushing over to study it, she bent over the bed and was looking hard at the stains, when her gaze lifted enough to see the ground on the other side. Her heart stopped in her throat right before she felt like she would vomit it forth in utter horror. Not even noticing what she was doing, she floated over the bed and landed.

Robin was lying there, his eyes closed. She bent down and examined him. There was a massive gash in his left wrist and the blood was everywhere. He had his staff in one hand and a picture in the other. His eyemask was on the floor behind him. Now that she had her eyes really open she noticed the broken picture and disheveled desk. She noticed the broken lamp.

Her normally calm mind was blank. Here was her leader and friend, lying on the ground in a pool of his own blood, and for the life of her she couldn't get her body to move. After what felt like ages, she finally got her limbs to reach out. Raven put her fingers into his neck, as his wrists weren't fit for the purpose, and she checked his pulse. It was deathly faint.

The feel of the struggling heartbeat inspired her to move a little faster. Reaching blindly behind her for the bed sheet while her eyes stayed locked on Robin, she ripped a long strip out of it when she had it in her grasp.

The coldness of his skin disturbed her when she lifted his wrist to wrap the strip around it.

That done, she stood up and used her powers to lift him into the air. He lie in thin air, his cape dangling behind him pointlessly. He couldn't stay there. He needed care and eventually the other Titans would come looking for him,and she didn't think they really needed to know about this.

It would only encite confusion and doubt. Passing around the edge of the bed, Raven looked down and noticed a bloody shard of glass lying on the ground next to a bright green glove. She only paused for a moment to turn and pick up his mask before going ahead out into the hall and to her room.

After closing her door behind her, she gently let him down on the bed. When he was safely rested, she looked down at her hands. The eyemask drooped defeatedly over her fingers. The mask's only ally had discarded it. If anything, the mask should be vengeful, not defeated.

Her eyes strayed back to the body on the bed. An untouchable entity. A mystery without clues. A diety that was now painfully human. His utter mortality was a slap in the face to even her. She couldn't imagine what the reactions of the others would be. Chaos would be the word of the day.

Robin's breathing was shallow and he was a whiter shade of pale.

Now, he wasn't just shoving into her persona territory, he was positively ramming into it. This kind of action would be expected of her, not the democratic, friendly, heroic, all around good guy, but admittedly secretive, leader.

She checked his pulse once more. It was still weak, but also still there. When she moved her fingers from his neck, she couldn't resist brushing back the unruly black hair. The bare face was assuredly handsome. But some of the effect was put off by the aura of decayed innocence that branded it. The look of a childhood that had been beaten out until its final gasps were tearing up the soul.

Part of his costume was stained red from the blood that had leaked onto his carpet.

A strange thought presented itself to Raven as she watched the prone form struggle on.

Who came when the heroes needed saving. It had to happen sometimes. Heroes couldn't be heroic all the time.

She supposed, they had never really been in the position to wonder that. Maybe they had needed saving at some time or another, but usually, another member of their team came. Another member, or Robin. He never needed saving, he did the saving. Taking on an apprenticeship to save them. Destroying a competition craved demon to free others. Coming back from a supposed death to take back a Tower. He was there when he was needed. Who came when he needed help in an impossible situation of near death. Why, he did of course.

Shaking her head of the treacherous thoughts she bandaged Robin's wrist, left him to sleep and went back to meditating. There was more chaos in her mind, but she cleared it up in short order, though not without a smidgen of difficulty, and a few screams of horror from her emotions. But, eventually, she was able to corral them back into a semblance of order. And she meditated.

Her legs unfolded from the air gracefully to support her on the ground. She came out of the calm of her chant to face her room once more. For a second she forgot how she'd gotten from the kitchen to her room. Then, piece by piece she began to remember the chain of events. As the final scene finally clicked into place, she turned swiftly around to look at her bed.

The stained back of his costume met her. He was doing something with his face turned towards the front of the bed. When he turned around and saw her looking, he immediately raised the mask that she had set on the bed and he had picked up to immediately cover his eyes, closing them to save her the vision. She stopped him, "I've already seen them Robin, there's no need." He jerked as though stung and lowered the mask to let his hands rest in his lap. "How did you see them?" His voice was still weak, but she could sense him trying to strain authority into the faint sound.

Now that she had meditated, she was much calmer than she had been before. Raven now had no qualms about telling Robin about his unintended revealing. "It was on the roof, it was an accident, but I saw them. So don't bother."

He hit his leg weakly, "I knew I shouldn't have done that." He looked down at his wrist, at the clothe wrapping. "Oh, I must have cut my hand when I slipped into that picture," he stumbled along in his words, most unlike him, "thanks for keeping me from bleeding to death, I'll leave you alone now." He chuckled weakly. Moving towards the door, he tried again to regain the air of the leader, "Get some sleep, full day tomorrow."

He was reaching for the door handle. A pale hand held his uninjured wrist. He looked up his eyes surprised and curious. For a second, Raven was thrown by the look of the two colors staring straight back at her. It was slightly disorienting. She regained her center soon enough, "You and I both know, that you didn't get that cut by slipping. Don't treat me like an idiot Robin, you're not that foolish."

His eyes widened in surprise and shame. "I..I.. well.." Raven rolled her eyes, she pointed her hand at the bed, and turned him around. It was too easy for her liking, "Sit, you're in no condition to be off walking like nothing is the matter." Instead of trying to argue with her, he turned to the bed and sat on it. He had been inaugerated as the leader, but he still treated her as his co-partner, they were on equal footing to him, and for that, she respected him.

Raven levitated in front of him, sitting indian style, "Now, beating around the bush has never worked for you, so tell me, why would you cut your own wrist?"

A look of incredible shame passed onto his face. A look that she was not accustomed to seeing on that face. Robin's head bowed and his hair lost all vitality, as though affected by his mood.

"I shouldn't stay to cause problems."

Raven cocked an inclining ear towards him, and she asked exasperatedly, her voice never wavering, if such a combination was possible, "What are you talking about Robin?"

When he stood up, he startled her, though she didn't show it. The mask was tied behind his head again before she could ask what he was doing,"Don't worry about it Raven, I've been fine before this, I'll be fine after. Boy Wonder, and all that. I don't have to answer to you, I'm the leader of this team."

He walked quickly towards the door, affecting an air of great authority. She turned and watched him open the door, "You may be the leader, but you're still human."

The pause was brief and the answer briefer, but it existed all the same, "Not as far as the Titans are concerned." Then the door was closed and she was alone in her room once more. She turned back to the bed. Something was sitting on the sheets. A picture.

Hesitantly, she picked it up. It was blood smeared. Examining it more closely, she looked under the blood. A woman with jet black hair and bright green eyes. They weren't the exact same color as Robin's left eye, but they were close. On the floor next to her ankles, was an infant. Brightly dressed and male. The hair was black and the eyes were shut. Even so, she thought she could guess the identity of the baby.

Raven sighed and set the picture on her night table. Levitating the sheets off of her bed, she threw them to the side. She needed to wash them. Blood wasn't a comfortable bed buddy.

Gods of Azar, she was not made to be a psychiatrist to a secretive, over protective, troubled, bird boy. It just wasn't in her job description.

She pulled out a new set of purple sheets and set about mentally fitting them onto the bed.

Maybe she'd go talk to Starfire. Sure, she affected annoyance, but she really enjoyed the alien girl's company. Everything that she couldn't be, not that she was inches away from going care bear or anything, she just missed the freedom of joy.

Before her brain could be stopped, it lighted on Robin's last comment, "_Not as far as the Titans are concerned." _That she could vaguely understand, not well mind you, but vaguely. But what really confused her was the despondent answer he'd given to her questioning of his injuries, "_I shouldn't stay to cause problems."_

Had he been referring to his presence in her room, she did make rather a show of wanting privacy. It hadn't sounded that way though. It had sounded as though he were apologizing for his existence. But that couldn't have been right, Robin didn't apologize much, and certainly not for existing, but then again, Robin had been doing a lot of things out of character lately.

Raven almost slapped herself, she'd let her head get pulled back into the subject without meaning to. Damn it, must. stop. thinking. about. it. Sighing an ever suffering sigh, she went out in search of Starfire. Damn Bird Boy.

The shower was turning his skin pink, and stinging in the cut that had begun to scab on his left wrist. And yet, he made no effort to protect it. His body wouldn't seem to move. The only things in his head flashed on and off in a nightmarish display of images.

Fingers on his torso. A sharp blade against his flesh. A grin behind a mask that would not be moved. His was long gone, thrown away long ago, to the screams of a voice once raised in defiance, in healthy, strong authority. Now the voice was wilted, pleading, the age of the human that created it for the first time in many years.

A hand raked up a thigh. Teeth on the neck. A chin jerked back to limit vision. The sense of dignity lying on the floor next to the mask, in a pool of the owner's soul.

Robin turned off the shower and stood in the chilling after effects of the cool air drafting through the curtain causing goosebumps to spread like fire over his body. Soon, he found himself shuddering violently. His eyes behind the mask were staring blankly at the bland white tile on the shower wall.

Whispered comments that wracked his mind and heart, tearing up the serenity that had once existed so well. Pain, pain that was beyond any injury he had ever recieved. Laughter that echoed madly in his head.

Finally, he stepped out of the shower, a zombie that paraded as its former self. The towel with his initial sewn on it hung limply on the rung next to the shower door. He dabbed wealkly at his skin, and threw it in the hamper on the way out of his bathroom. As absent as his mind was at this moment, he could not allow himself to be sloppy.

The first real lesson learned from Batman, sometimes you will make wrong choices, and sometimes you will make right ones, whichever occurs, be neat about it, allow no loose ends.

Of course, the second lesson had been, don't make wrong choices, rather pointless wasn't it.

Turning away from the closet that held his fears and loathing, he lay back on his bed, allowing the circulated air to dry his pale and strong body.

"You are so noble Robin, one trait I am sorry to say we do not share. Noble, but this pride must stop, how will you be useful to me if you will not obey me. I suppose this is the only way to instill this small lesson."

The feeling of the rough corner under his gloved hands. The despair that flooded his being as the shadow devoured his own. The child-like timidity that was foreign to his body, but yet he couldn't dispell it.

Losing all thought of rising and living for now, he stay there, spread eagle on his bed, staring at the smooth steel of his room's cieling. He wouldn't try again, he'd lost some of the courage and now Raven would watch him doubly close.

She came back down the hall towards her room, discovering that Starfire had gone out on a walk. She hadn't outright asked about her, that would be suspicious, she'd gleaned it rom the conversation between Beast Boy and Cyborg.

She stopped and looked at Robin's door. She seemed to be directing her vision towards it a lot lately. Sighing defeatedly, she turned to it again. Maybe she would try to inquire about his strange behavior once more, it couldn't hurt.

She knocked. At first there was no answer and her heart leapt into her throat again, trying desperately to maintain control she knocked again. This time, she heard footsteps. A moment's pause then more footsteps. The door opened. Her mouth opened and the words caught in her throat.

Robin stood before her, masked. But other than that, there wasn't much else. A towel encircled his waist and tied at his right hip. His abs were toned and firm, left no room for slack. Out of his towel grew muscular thighs, all these things coated in pale flesh. Scars, it seemed, were his trademark. They were everywhere on his body. glancing along his pectorals down towards his back. A particularly jagged one ran diagonally across the length of his stomach. The one that drew her eye the most though was the set on his neck. Small punctures, it looked like, run in semicircular patterns, like the shape of a mouth.

The hip with the towel knotted on it jutted to one side cockily, the very copyright of confidence. She brought her eyes back to his face.

Robin's eyebrows rose above his eyemask in a questioning gesture, "Is something wrong, Raven?" His voice was light, unconcerned. For a moment, she believed the whole ordeal with his wrist had been a figment of her underworked imagination. But her illusion was shattered when she looked at the wrist hanging limply by his left side, the gash was still there, though it had stopped bleeding.

The sight of that cleared her head and she became stern, "I was just wondering if you would tell me now what was wrong?"

Robin sighed as though he'd told her the answer to this millions of times, "Nothing is wrong, Raven, I'm fine, superb, peachy. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'd like to get into some clothes, if it's okay with you." He gestured down at his half naked body, and despite her efforts to suppress it, she felt a blush creep to her face. She turned to continue on her way, "This isn't over Boy Wonder." His voice stopped her, "Raven."

She didn't turn around because she was responding to his words, she turned around because of the sudden danger she heard there. Whatever he was about to tell her was to be obeyed no matter what, should the tower fall, it would remain silence. "Yes Robin?"

He looked at her and she stared back. White met violet. His hip wasn't jutted any longer, it aligned with his back in a formidable column. The way he stood there looking at her, she felt fear begin to creep up her spine. For one who didn't do fear, this was sure coming on strong. He continued, "Whatever you saw behind this mask, or behind this door stays in those places and your mind. None, and I mean none, of the things you've seen today are to be told to the rest ot the Titans. As much as I respect you, that. is. an. order."

Foregoing the sarcastic comment that would've usually followed such a statement, she nodded her head in mute respect of his wish to remain anonymous.

His door closed immediately and she changed directions to head towards the main room. The last image in her mind before she was distracted by another argument between Beast Boy and Cyborg was the sight of the bite mark on Robin's neck. She didn't know why she noticed it, it just screamed suspicion at her . Out of place, certainly. She would eventually break the constitution of the stubborn Bird, it was inevitable, everybody could be broken.

The door closed back, locking him in with himself, the one person he couldn't stand. He tugged the towel off again, placing it tediously once more in the hamper. The closet door whooshed into its slot in the wall when he pushed the button, and he was left staring at the mass of red and green suits that so identified the person that the others saw him as. Robin pulled one off of a hanger and closed the closet door.

The material felt grotesque under his hands. He would love nothing more than to burn every single one of those costumes, allowing the ashes to wipe his mind like a chalk board. But, then the others would wonder, and he couldn't have that. So day in, and day out, he came to this closet, pulled out a costume that caused him almost physical pain, and wore it proudly, for their sake.

For the sake of the Titans.

The truth was, he was beginning to wonder if that wasn't the purpose of his mission now. Justice had nothing to do with it, he did everything for the welfare of the Titans. He slipped the costume on once more, and prepared to do what he must. He pinned the "R" on his chest, slipped the gloves carefully over his hands, trying not to disturb the cut, and... frustradedly remembered that it was time for bed.

Reversing the entire process, he hung the costume back up and put on the flannel sleeping pants that had been a present from Cyborg last Christmas. Robin took one look at the blood on the sheets and turned towards the floor, grabbing his pillow and a blanket from underneath the bed.

It wouldn't be the first time he'd slept on a floor. He'd slept in much worse places. He let the pillow hit the ground with a soft thump and he sat down in front of it, adjusting the blanket he'd brought with him. He had a spare set of sheets, but he was male, so they weren't clean right now.

He let his head hit the pillow and he fell asleep. Not a deep sleep, he made a point never to sleep too deeply. You never know when something coud happen that required him to be alert and ready. Also, if you didn't sleep too deeply, you didn't dream. Dreams could be distracting, distracting and therefore, dangerous.

She was woken up by the blaring sound of an alarm. The Titan alarm was tearing its way through their metal halls. Immediately she vaulted out of her bed and into her cape. She ran to the elevator as quickly as she could still be graceful, and she had to wait for it, it was busy.

When it opened, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy wer already in it. She got in and the doors closed. The elevator rose swiftly to the main room and opened, allowing them to spill out.

When they came in the room, Robin was already at the console in his costume, typing away madly. Beast Boy screwed his fist into his eyes like a kid and asked groggily, "Dude, how does he get here so fast?"

Before any of the remaining members could answer him, Robin's voice interrupted them, "Good gang, you're here, there's a disturbance on 31st and Vine." Starfire floated over to his side and looked blankly at the screen, "What is the nature of the disturbance?"

Robin tapped and few keys and responded, "Night club, it was attacked by hundreds of moths, sound familiar?"

Cyborg groaned and hit the cybernetic side of his skull with the flat side of his hand, causing a bright, tinny clink, "Man, I thought we put him away."

Robin kept his back to the group,"We did, but he's out, so lets go put him back."

"Alright Dude." "Glorious!"

Raven pulled up her hood and headed for the window.

Raven was just stepping onto the ledge when a hand stopped her. Craning her neck to look around she snarked at Robin, "What, we need to hurry."

"I realise this Raven, but we're not all going to the same place."

"Fine then _Boy Wonder_, where am _I_ going?"

Robin's mouth grit into a thin line and he seemed to be holding back his temper, "You, Raven are going to go and try to stop Killer Moth himself, with myself. While Starfire, Beast Boy, and Cyborg go to try and hold back the moths, so come with me down to the garage."

An arterie throbbed on Raven's forehead, but regardless, she turned and followed Robin towards the elevator silently. The remaining Titans probably could have baked themselves in the wake they left.

As the elevator door closed, Starfire looked at Beast Boy, and Beast Boy looked at Cyborg.

Beast Boy let a bead of sweat drop down his forehead, "Did any of you guys sense that maaaaaaajor tension?"

"Yeah man, since when did Robin and Raven go at each others throats like that?"

"I do not know why our friends are biting each other in the jugular area, but we must hurry if we are to be of use at the club of the evening."

The other two members nodded their head and walked towards the window.

The appendages on Beast Boy's body disappeared and formed into large feathered wings. Starfire positioned her hands under Cyborgs armpits and she lifted him into the air. Making her arms comfortable, she flew out of the window behind Beast Boy in the general direction of 31st and Vine.


	4. 10 easy ways to cross a burned bridge

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter Four

By: Lunatic With Hero Complex

"I will not get on that thing, I'll just fly." "Nonsense, you will get on this "thing" because if you fly you won't know where to go, he moved his damn layer, and I can't give you the directions."

"What, the amazing Robin has something he can't do?"

The eyemask thinned and he fell silent. The right boot lifted as he straddled the seat of the R-Cycle, and he looked back at her, "Just get on Raven, I'm not going to fight with you over a ride at a time like this."

She shivered at the sudden weariness divulged in that simple statement. He seemed to be losing his passion.

Huffing loudly, she straddled the seat behind him.

The engine rumbled beneath her as the key was turned, sparking the starter. The only warning he gave her before they sped out of the garage was "Hold on."

At first she ignored him, honestly how bad could the ride be. She soon found out that it could be very bad indeed. He took corners at breakneck speed, angling the tail end of the bike so that it spun out just right, leaving them pointing in the right direction and still burning rubber.

Sooner than she'd like to admit, she found her arms snaking around Robin's waist. Her palms met rough muscle, but also ribs, and while they betrayed her stoic nature and gripped tightly together on the front of his abdomen, Raven couldn't help but think about the scars that all this spandex hid. How many of those scars had been obtained when they weren't looking. He had to be a master at hiding pain by now.

From his action of the past day or so, she guessed that he could continue on merrily with broken ribs, fighting the assholes of the underworld, and none of the Titans would be much the wiser.

A bridge loomed up ahead, a bridge over a tributary of the ocean that was currently in the up position. Any minute now, Robin would decrease the speed and they would stop to wait on the bridge to lower. Odd, he seemed to be speeding up, not a good sign, and now he was speeding up even more. Her fists twisted into his costume, pinching sections of the spandex in the crevices between her fingers. "Robin, this is not a good idea." "Like you said Raven, we have to hurry."

Underneath her tight grip she felt the resounding thump of his heart as it speeded up. Her hood had been swept back by the wind long ago and now, in a moment of weakness, she found herself tucking her bare head into the hollow of his back. Her lavendar eyes peeked over his shoulder and watched as they neared the large crevice in between the two slabs of asphalt, she turned her eyes back into his costume.

In that freakish moment when she felt the bike take to the air, the only thought that was passing through her head was that she could smell Robin's Old Spice.

Then she was jarred back to the situation by the shattering bump that occurred when they landed. Before Raven had time to realise they were still alive, they were speeding along again. To her utter surprise, she thought she heard Robin laughing, her suspicions were confirmed when she could feel the rapid up and down movements of his shoulders. Feeling slightly annoyed with his jocularity, she gave him a slight whump on the shoulder.

He grinned over his shoulder at her and then turned his head back around just in time to make a hairline turn onto a hidden alley. Suddenly they were encased in darkness, usually her element, but now it unnerved her. Robin slowed slightly, not much, but enough so that she understood he was being cautious.

"Where in the hell are we Robin?"

His voice was distant, like he was speaking through a wind tunnel, "Close, but no cigar. Not hell, but we're pretty far underground. I discovered this place about 2 months ago. Actually, I was planning on demolishing it, and incarcerating it's occupant without telling you guys, but...things, occurred."

Raven didn't fail to notice the pause, and she associated the "things" with Slade. She didn't dwell on it too much. It hurt to think on it, she supposed it had been rough for Robin as well, but nobody really knew. Only two people knew and one was evil, and one wasn't talking. Damn secretive Bird Boy. That was his new adopted nickname. She wasn't one for profanity, but he certainly brought out the unexpected in people.

Damn secretive Bird Boy.

* * *

God he loved this bike. It was almost like he was wired to it, just like Cyborg and his T-car. It responded to his slightest command effortlessly. He felt Raven's grip tighten around his waist and grinned. He had no idea why that pleased him. Thinking about his time spent with Slade

(so noble, Robin)

never equaled happiness, but her presence made it easier. It was less difficult to act when you had an audience.

The idea of this little mission was that they would go to Killer Moth's "secret" layer and capture him. Then having the field wide open so that they could call back the winged devils.

But that would be impossible if Killer Moth heard them coming. So, he stopped the bike suddenly, skidding it to a stop calmly, and turned it off. When Raven looked at him quizzically he just said, "Noise."

She nodded and followed him down the remaining alleyway. Thats what he admired about Raven. Sure, he would always be best friends with Beast Boy, but it was nice not to have to explain everything ten times before they could progress. He turned his mind into a broadcasting station,

_Raven, can you hear me?_

_Of course I can hear you Robin.  
_

_Good, we're going to communicate like this until we reach the layer. _

_Understood._

_I will be giving you directions this way, in case we become seperated, so concentrate._

_I never stop Robin._

_Good. _

_Robin?_

_Yes, Raven?_

_When will you tell me the truth?_

_About what, Raven?_

_You know about what._

_I'm afraid I'm in the dark._

_Fine, if you want to be blunt. _

_I never said that, Raven._

_Nonetheless, you're forcing me._

_I still don't understand._

_Why'd you cut your wrist?_

_Robin you can't ign..._

_Left here, Raven._

_Robin, its pointless to try and avoid the sub..._

_Right here Raven._

_Now, that I see no turns for quite a while, answer me before I get an..._

_We're here, Raven get ready._

_Quietly_

_A few more seconds_

_You won't be able to avoid me forever Bird Boy._

_I know_

_Now_

Robin crept swiftly and silently through an extremely small space in the wall. Raven followed grudgingly, hating the man in front of her for his evasive skills.

They came out of the crevice and were met with the sight of a dull gray room. There were mechanical switchboards galore, but they were dark and dusty. From the looks of things, this place had been out of use for a while. Robin turned his head cautiously from side to side and then stood up completely.

He turned to Raven, already reaching for his communicator, "They must have moved, I'll call the oth...!" He was grabbed from behind earning a fierce shout of anger from the leader.

"You always were so noble Robin, thinking of the people you should keep safe before you even begin to worry about your own well being."

Robin' s heart froze in fear, a rare occurrence to say the least. That voice, he thought that finally, that night in the factory, he'd escaped ever having to hear, physically if not mentally, that voice again. Even detectives were wrong sometimes.

He tried desperately to appear in control of the situation, "Just another reason why I am nothing like you, Slade."

To his imminent displeasure, all this earned Robin, was a chuckle from Slade, "My dear boy, why use such a tone of forcefulness in your voice. I've heard you scream in complete agony until your lungs are dry and your tonque is swollen, what are tones to me?"

Robin shuddered to himself without wanting to, hating his own weakness. He looked over at Raven who was being held by two of slades guards. They were fitted with funny machines on their shoulders. Judging by Raven's behavior, those devices served to short circuit her power somehow. He desperately would've preferred that she not be here for this conversation.

The beautiful purple eyes that so often were crinkled in indifference were now wide and quizzical and staring straight back at him, he ducked his head to the side, even stopping his struggle in the embarrassment.

To further his misfortune, Slade noticed Robin's behavior and found it amusing, "What's the matter Robin, haven't told your fellow Titans what your Apprenticeship entailed?"

Robin didn't bring his eyes up, his will wasn't broken, or anything quite that simple, but defying the bastard was easier if he didn't have to look at Raven, "No, and you better keep your mouth quiet, that Apprenticeship is between you and me, no matter how much I hate sharing anything with you."

Another chuckle emanated from the hideous mask on that he only assumed hideous face, "Now, now. We can't have anyone in the room being lost in the conversation can we." Robin looked up, he could stand it, for this, "No, I'd rather her be clueless."

"Robin we can't have it all, now can we, either we let her in on the conversation, or I eliminate her from our company. I'll be nice, its your choice."

Raven was looking back and forth between them, curiosity changing into a mixture of anger at being ignored and fear of the information that even Robin thought was too horrible for her to know.

The eyemask crinkled in hatred, anger, and worst of all defeat, "Fine, tell her, just don't hurt her."

This man would not stop laughing, it seemed everything he said caused mirth to come from his putrid mouth.

Slade turned to Raven and she tried to be defiant in the face of the fear she couldn't suppress. The result was a kind of half slouch half stand, where one shoulder was thrown back and her neck looked up while ducking down.

Slade looked at her for what felt like an eternity before speaking, "Did Robin never tell you anything about his stay with me as my apprentice?"

Much as she hated to, Raven had to respond. She looked over at the slumped Robin in three of the guard's arms and turned back to face the brown and black mask, "Just that it happened, you overstuffed egomaniac."

"Ooh, fiesty. No wonder you Titans don't talk to her much, wouldn't want to get her angry."

"Well, my purple princess, Robin had many duties as my apprentice. He stole for me, he fought for me. At one point, he even intimidated for me. But out of all of these duties, there is one that remains my favorite. Do you know what that was, princess?"

"No," Raven grumbled. She cast another look at Robin, who was tensed up as if expecting a blow.

"Well, then I shall inform you. Robin was also employed to appease my desires. I stripped the Boy Wonder of his dignity, his innocence, though there wasn't much left of that to take, his costume, and finally... his mask."

Her mind was in chaos, utter chaos. Robin. Robin, under Slade. Robin screaming for him to stop. Her brain balked like a stubborn mule,as she suddenly recieved the images from the blaring pain of Robin's mind, refusing to believe such a concept. Latching on to the thought that it was all lies, she was utterly prepared to come up accusing. Then her eyes lit on Robin. He'd stopped all pretense of struggle and he hung limply in the guards arms, almost looking crucified, and she knew it was true. Now, she rather understood why he was trying so desperately to avoid her prying questions.

His authority was the last thing he had left. The Titans were his last chance at redemption in his mind. They must not be tainted. Now, it was too late. Things could only go downhill from here.

Slade turned back to the guards who had the once arduous task of holding Robin. He gestured to the far wall where a set of chains was mounted on the wall.

The three guards dragged the limp form of the Boy Wonder over to the shackles. He didn't struggle, or even complain, he just lie there like a puppet with its strings cut. Slade turned his face back to Raven, and she could almost see him smirking, "See, everyone can be broken, even the all powerful Robin can fall, still want to defend him?" Robin looked up dejectedly, he hadn't talked since Slade had told her. Raven's heart secretly broke and she turned defiantly to face the masked bastard, "Until I can't breath."

The words hit Robin like a missile and he jerked as his eyes squinted closed. Slade growled, but then chuckled, "ahhh, well that won't happen for sometime yet, but we do have other things to discuss Robin."

Robin looked at Slade with squinted ovals, suspicious, "What is it?"

Slade shook his head at the masked boy who was staring at him hotly, "My unlimited sources tell me that you have been hurting yourself. Not just hurting, but endangering, and if not for our friend here," he gestured at Raven, "you would no longer be with us."

"What of it, its none of your concern." Robin was trying to grasp the edge he'd once held on to, trying to regain some kind of control in a situation that had no reigns.

"Robin, I've tasted your flesh, I've torn it, I claimed you, only I am allowed to hurt you, you are my property, so the fact that you are infringing on my property makes me very angry."

"I don't give a damn what makes you angry Slade, the only thing that I want out of you are your dying breaths."

Though her brain was past thinking calmly, it nonetheless made the connection between Slade's comments and the bite marks on Robin's neck. The same brain that made these connections was marvelling at the fact that Robin was still trying to be defiant in the face of something that it seemed had been causing him a great deal of trouble. It struck her dumb until she heard the rest of the conversation.

"Now, why don't we let our adamant friend over here go into the next room so that we can have a private discussion about the trespass you have committed."

"Slade, I don't care what you have to talk about, Raven is not going out of my sight."

She was taken aback that even now when he was in such a vunerable position, he was trying to make it so that they could escape together.

Slade tskked at Robin, shaking his finger as though Robin were a bad puppy, "You should know better than that Robin. I'm going to be having demonstrations. Either she goes and we discuss this in private, or she stays and I use her as an example."

The eyemask widened again and Robin's head jerked nervously from Slade's line of view to look at Raven, even though she couldn't see his eyes, she almost heard the finality of his gaze. When he spoke, it was in a deadened tone that sounded nothing like him. It sounded like Robin was already leaving and he was leaving his body to suffer what it would, "Fine, she can go, but if you hurt her, no shackles will be strong enough to keep me from getting revenge."

"That was a very good threat Robin, but don't worry, I wasn't going to hurt your friend, I have no reason to bother her, but Robin, you still have not learned. You are still so noble. We must stop that."

He gestured behind him and the guards began to drag Raven towards the opening to a hallway across the room, Raven immediately began to scream, "Let me go you ignorant bastards! I will not be hauled away! Let me go, Robin, come on, fight him, you can get out of those shackles, no problem!" She kicked and she yelled, but the guards were unyielding. His eyemask watched her go and she stared back until her view of him was blocked out by Slade as he stepped in front of the wall.

The silence of the room was only broken by Raven's yelling as she was dragged down the hall. Robin's eyeline met Slade's and they sat staring at each other for an interminable amount of time.

Finally, Slade broke the silence, he walked toward Robin pulling a tray behind him, "Now Robin, as the sole owner of the property that is your body, mind, and spirit, I am going to show you that only I am allowed to abuse that property."

The metal glove pulled back the blue sheet that covered the tray, revealing scalpels, forceps, needles, a file, a torch, and something that looked remarkably like a brand, a brand in the shape of a 'S'.

Lifting the scalpel, he sliced through Robin's upper costume, allowing the two sides to flutter uselessly to the sides of his chest revealing the muscles that had taken years to develop, "First, we have to scout my territory, understand the terrain." The scalpel pressed against the tie around Robin's head. It grew tauter and tauter until the cord snapped and the mask fluttered to the ground. The light rushed eagerly to flood in on the eyes that had captivated Slade.

Slade at first had only wanted Robin for his apprentice, just a protigee to succeed him. Then, in the brief time which Robin had served that apprenticeship, Slade had become enamored of Robin's body, and his eyes. Their duality delighted him, almost to him representing the good and evil battling within Robin. Now, now that he had been given free reign of those features, he could think of nothing else. He wanted nothing but to have that body and those eyes under his control, to see them defeated and mastered, bowing to his command.

"Now, shall we see what kind of soil my property has, that is important after all." The scalpel came down and rested against the tautness of Robin's abs. The sharp side pressed harder and harder until a bead of blood dripped onto the blade. When he'd seen that he'd broken the skin, he pushed it farther in and dragged it across the width of his torso.

Robin grunted in pain and bit his tonque to keep from shouting as he dangled limply against the wall. "Ahh come now Robin, I know you can scream better than that." He dug the scalpel even deeper and wiggled it gleefully from side to side, digging dangerously close to vital organs, but just missing them.

Robin shouted slightly, almost a sigh and he dug his mouth into his arm. He was after all, just sixteen, true almost seventeen, but nonetheless, not even old enough to vote.

Slade giggled, "Better, but not quite what I wanted." Robin watched with horror as Slade reached for a thing of salt and the forceps.

* * *

Raven was thrown into a bright room where she was immediately locked in. After she was sure she was left alone, she tried her powers. Once again, the attempt fell flaming to the ground. She let out a rare shout. Without her powers to go haywire, she had the freedom to emit all kinds of emotions, what a sucky trade off at a time like this.

Leaning her head against the wall, she heard a shout from outside of her room. Unless there were other captives, that could not bode well for Robin.

She still couldn't understand, he'd sent her out of the room so she wouldn't have to suffer like a despondent parent sending his young child out of the way of a violent family dispute. So she wouldn't have to watch. He was protective, but also, she thought that he was incredibly proud and that he would not like for her to see him in a vunerable way.

She heard footsteps down the hall. She couldn't power her way out of here, she'd have to find other means, besides, her powers weren't her only defense, Robin had seen to that.

She hid behind where the door would open, silently, the door knob creaked and it began to open.

* * *

Slade was having a good time. He'd finally gotten the scream he was waiting for, true he'd had to try very hard to get it, but he'd gotten it. He'd tried everything, he'd cut Robin's body repeatedly, and followed up by holding the wounds open with forceps and rubbing salt in them. He'd beaten around Robin's limp form, until you couldn't tell the skin from the clothing, and blood leaked out of the corners of his mouth. Of course he'd left the face unharmed, not the face that he so desperately wanted to hear beg.

Finally in a peak of desperation, he'd started in on Robin's fingers, reciting a dastardly verse of rhyme before snapping each one back on itself, "One finger to point out your hate," Snap "Two fingers to say peace." Snap "Three fingers for the truth you state," Snap "Four fingers for numbers not the least." Snap "Five fingers makes a hand to greet your friends, or slap your enemies." Snap

Still not recieving the response he desired, he tried his final resort.

He picked up the torch and the brand and he stood in front of the once proud hero while he heated the metal to a glowing red, "Now, this could be avoided if you just would give me my scream."

The face that was remarkably clean save for the drying line of blood from the corner of the mouth just looked at him wearily.

Finally the 'S' was at the peak of heat and Slade dropped the torch back on the tray. Before Robin had time to brace himself the brand was thrust on the patch of skin directly beneath where the 'R' would be.

The sizzle of burning flesh hit the room until it was drowned out by the scream that Slade had been waiting for. It all came out as one howl so full of pain and hate that hackles rode up Slade's neck.

After letting the brand sizzle for a minute or two, Slade removed it and dropped in some water, "See, was that so difficult?"

* * *

The door creaked open and Raven waited. It swung back, and Raven waited. A robot stepped in, and Raven waited. The robot went to close the door, and Raven attacked. While it's back was turned, she sent herself forward in a double flying kick and knocked the robot down, sending with it the tray of tranquilizers it had been carrying. While it was down, she rushed out of the door closing it to lock behind her.

She made her way back down the hallway she'd been dragged along. Swiftly, but stealthily. As she came to the end of it, she heard Slade's receding voice, "Don't move Robin, I'll be back."

When she heard the footsteps die away, she snuck into the room. She cast her eyes around. Her breath backed up in her throat and she almost screamed.

He lie against the wall, wrists strained in the shackles.

The upper half of his costume was gone, revealing the chest she'd been admiring just this afternoon, thousands of years ago. But it was not the chest from this afternoon. It was black and blue, and bloody. It almost looked unreal. There was a large 'S' burned into his chest. But the worst thing was his face. It was almost spotless. True, there was a bit of blood near his chin, but otherwise unharmed. The eyes were closed and tears were leaking out of the sides of the lids. It was like the face of a fallen angel, truly beautiful in its pain.

Her breath started coming in short gasps, too many revelations about this person in one day could be deadly. Looking jerkily around, her vision saw the yellow utility belt lying on the tray of bloody tools, the sight of which made her almost tear up. Running to it, she looked for a bird-a-rang, something sharp enough to cut the chains. Instead, her eyes fell on the file.

Pulling a dusty chair over to his side, she stood on it and lifted one of the chains to start attacking it. She started hacking away, hoping these things were as strong as they looked.

When she chanced to look down, she was met with brown and green. She almost stopped, but she just kept banging away, despite his steady gaze. "You got out." It was faint, but damn it all to hell, it was coherent. "Yes, I managed a form of escape, and I'm doing the same for you." "Just leave me, its safer." "Stop your mumbling, Robin, I'm busy."

Finally, the chain broke and Raven moved on to the other. This one gave much more easily. Robin started to tumble to the floor, but Raven caught him. A subdued shout was emitted, but otherwise he was silent, he was losing blood fast and she needed to get him out of here.

Picking up the mask and the belt, she hoisted Robin on her back and dragged him towards the place where they had come in.

She got him out in the alley, where she discovered her powers started working and she levitated him back through all the turns he'd taken her through. When she finally reached the R cycle, she hoisted him on the back and told him to hold on the best he could.

Thanking the gods of Azar that her powers had dominion over objects, she navigated the bike out of the alleyway and towards the street. She brought it back towards the bridge that was now in the down position and around the sharp turns he'd angled, and finally down the road to the tower, where she parked the cycle in the garage and brought Robin up the stairs in front of her.

She set him down on the couch, this scene too much like the one earlier for her liking. He had lost too much blood this evening. While she was thinking about this, his voice broke into her mind, a mental voice that was more like the former Robin.

_Raven I can't talk very well right now, so I'm going to give you instructions this way, alright?_

"Yes, Robin, this is alright."

_Good, contact the others, I have a feeling that the moths were an extreme false alarm._

"Alright, I will."

She pulled out her communicator and flipped it open with a star trek sound, "Cyborg, are you there?"

A few seconds of fuzz passed, then a voice answered, "Yeah Rae, I'm here."

"How did your end turn out?"

"Well, funny thing, we got there, and there were no moths."

"I see." Raven turned to Robin, "You're too smart for your own good."

_Don't I wish it wasn't so._

"Well Cyborg, I need you to head back with the others, what have you been doing?"

"Well we couldn't get a hold of you guys, so we got some breakfast. It was almost morning anyway."

Raven looked funny at the window for a moment, then turned back to the communicator, "Just get back here."

Cyborg tried to keep going, "Raven what's going on he..."

But Raven closed the machine.

She turned to Robin, "They're coming, do you want me to put the mask on?"

His eyes stared right through her, one seemed rather dead.

_No_

Her eyes rounded in spite of herself, "Really."

_I don't have the physical or mental will to care anymore, its time they saw, after this, nothing will be secret. The attack will be everywhere. You've stolen Slade's toy. He won't be happy. I'd rather we be united. If you can, though, hold off about what Slade told you. _

A funny form of mental laughter reached her over the link.

"What is so funny?"

_Raven, in the past few hours, I have trusted you more than I've trusted anyone in my life, well almost anyone. I never thought that it would come to this. I thought that I could be exceptional and withstand the pressure, but in the end, I am just a kid. A kid. Though I suppose, I haven't had the spirit of a kid for many years now. _

_Raven?_

"Yes Robin?"

_I'm fixing to pass out, a mixture of pain and blood loss, so the connection will be cut._

His eyes blinked at her and she saw their conviction waver, "Don't worry, you'll be fine."

_Remember, as far as they know, Slade caught me, and he was mad. Nothing besides that for right now. They can see my eyes, but let me keep some of my secrets. O.k. Ra..._

The connection faded and she was left alone in verbal and mental silence, waiting for the arrival of her other team mates.


	5. The diary of ruined furniture

The Importance of Secrecy

By: Lunatic With Hero Complex

Chapter Five

The chair was almost intoxicatingly comfortable. Of course, that had been part of the criteria when they were shopping for their furniture.

The couch was even more comfortable, but at the moment, it was occupied.

Sadly, the couch was also rather stained. This was going to be an interesting laundry week with everything, from sheets to couch covers, coming in bloodstained. Of course, Raven would handle the sheets personally, Robin had agreed to let them see the maskless face, not the faceless memory.

Speaking of that face, she was worried. After he'd passed out, she'd taken to bandaging him up, trying desperately to stop the bleeding. It hadn't been working. By the time she finally got it under some semblance of control, he'd lost a bad amount of blood.

Having recently sat down after finishing this task, she contemplated whether she should take him to the infirmary. On one side, she could get him hooked up and perform a transfusion. On the complete other hand, she wasn't completely sure what type of blood Robin had. She could've probably found the information on the computer files, but Robin was the only one who had the access codes to reach those files. Only one sentence came to mind.

Damn Secretive Bird Boy.

She leaned back, resting her head against the, well headrest. Her eyes drifted close and she was almost into a full fledged sleep when her mind was invaded.

It was sudden and immediate, forcing its way into the front of her cerebral vision like it was desperate to be noticed. A shout of pain so loud that she almost covered her ears. It reverberated, it tore at her. It was raping her thoughts, and she couldn't understand the source. That was, until she saw the pictures to the storybook.

The room was basically barren. A few human touches that looked faded. The corner was the center of activity at the moment and Raven at first had difficulty recognizing the people. Then, unfortunately, she did.

Robin was in the corner, his hands planted against the wall, trying to push them back so he could move further away. It wasn't working. Slade was advancing.

The Boy Wonder began to crouch, like a five year old under the oppression of a violent father. The mask looked up at the advancing figure. The figure's hand reached out and grabbed the mask, yanking it off of the head of the sixteen year old male. Now she could see that the eyes were wide in fear. She had never seen her leader like this and it was truly sad.

The screen fast forwarded and now she was looking at a dark pool of colors on the ground next to the mask. The noises were coming from off screen, then the camera panned left. In the frame now was a square of floor over by the door.

Robin's hands were pinned above his head, which was turned to the side against the floor. Slade's head was in the hollow that the position left in his neck. Robin let out a sudden cry and Slade drew back laughing, now the world was lurched forward and she was thrown above Robin, so she could see the holes in his neck, where blood was slowly trickling out.

Slade stood up,"Stay right there," and she saw that the bird had been stripped of its feathers. His costume was gone and he was lying there defenseless. While Slade was out of view, he rolled on his side, and she could see that his body wanted to curl into the fetal position but that he wouldn't let it. Even now, in this moment of horrible degradation, he insisted on discipline.

A tear found it's lonely way down his cheek from his brown eye. Eventually, due to the oppressive influence of gravity, it rolled down across his nose and fell to the floor. That brought to her attention the carpet beneath him. Next to where his muscled thighs were stacked on each other, there was a large spot of blood. He was rather bruised and she seemed to understand that whatever else he was, Slade was not a gentle host.

Slade came back into the screen of vision and he had a knife in his hand. He was turning Robin back on his back when the vision faded and the screen opened up again on the same room. Only this time, the figure in it was alone. Robin was lying on the bed like structure, once again, his back straight. He was fully reclothed in the Slade costume and the mask was back on. He had a Titan ComLink in his hand and the hand was resting on the pillow next to his head. She heard her own voice coming out of it. "...much as we don't want to believe it, Robin is a still a criminal, and just like any other criminal..." Here Cyborg's voice came in, "The Teen Titans have to take him down."

Robin turned the communicator off and got up, dejectedly. Raven assumed he was now going to the second place where they had met each other, on that horrible roof top.

Then the world went black.

The Titan living room came back, along with its inhabitant.

Raven blinked rapidly, blessing her mind, loving it. It had thrown her from the brink of horrible reflections that weren't hers.

Robin was still lying placidly unconcious on the couch. He didn't look to have the normal signs of a person in the throes of a nightmare. He looked like someone who was unconcious.

Unfortunately, she noticed a few broken knick knacks around the living room, no doubt her doing.

When Slade said desires, she'd had no idea that the man's wants were so far ranging. She couldn't understand how the Boy wonder was still standing up straight in battle.

Of course, Raven understood a thing or two about hiding pain, hiding secrets, but she still didn't see how Robin had bounced back to his position so springily.

Then again, she realised, in his own way, he hadn't. After returning to the tower, he was just as effective in the combat and capture of criminals, but he had spent a lot of time in his room, and when he walked around the tower, he did it quickly, and quietly, like he was hiding.

He'd slowly stopped doing it, but in the beginning, so subtly it was hardly noticable, he had.

She decided to compromise between her two choices. She would take Robin to the infirmary and hook him up to vital's monitors, but she wouldn't give him a transfusion until she could find out what type of blood he had.

The body levitated above the couch, covered in a blanket, and it began to move towards the elevator. The doors opened and they entered. Raven pushed the appropriate button, and the doors closed. She was left in the clostrophobic car with Robin. He floated next to her silently and finally the car dinged and the doors opened into the hallway, she entered the medlab and positioned Robin on the bed.

She was hooking Robin up when her communicator beeped. She took it out and flipped it open, "Yeah?"

Cyborg's voice answered her, "Where are you and what the hell happened to the couch?"

Raven rolled her eyes, "Just come to the medlab, and fast, try to keep Star busy and out of here for the time being, I need you to help me clean him up before she sees him. We don't want her screaming her head off."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Just come Cyborg."

Raven flicked the com closed and turned back to her job.

A few minutes later, Cyborg came in the door, loud and slightly angry, with Beast Boy in tow, "Just what exactly do you mean, being all commandy like that and not explaining yourself... Whoah."

His eyes had come to rest on Robin. The human eye squinted in slight horror at the state of his body.

Beast Boy was slightly less calm about it, his arms began waving about and he slightly resembled a headless chicken, "Dude, Oh My God, this is not good!"

Cyborg slapped his hand over the changling's mouth and turned to Raven, "What happened to him?"

Raven went back to her business, talking to Cyborg over her shoulder, "Turns out the whole moth hoax was just a plan to get Robin to a hideout that he discovered about two months before he became Slade's apprentice. The problem, Moth didn't live there anymore, it is now inhabited by Slade. Slade got a little excited to see Robin again, and had a little fun. Fortunately for both of us, Slade's robots are stupid, and I was able to get us out, but he's not in good condition and I don't know what type of blood he has."

There was little to no inflection in her voice, but even the usually emotionally stinted Beast Boy could tell it bothered her.

Cyborg sprang into action immediately, "He has A, I think I might have a spare bag in the storage unit." The robotic man walked over to a keypad on the wall, typed in a few numbers and a compartment sprung out of the structure. He browsed his fingers through for a second, stopped at a few, then continued on,finally stopping at a particular bag, pulling it out.

Walking over to Robin's IV, he checked the insertion, then plugged the bag in, allowing the drip to carry the blood in.

"Hopefully, that'll work."

Raven was beginning to feel a little glad for the Boy Wonder, that was until Beast Boy opened his mouth, "You know what I just noticed, Robin's mask is gone dude."

Cyborg double checked with his mismatched eyes and he saw it was true, the sleeping wonder was maskless, "Rae how did you manage that?" "I didn't, Slade did, and Robin allowed me to leave it off."

"He was concious when you brought him in?"

"Yes, why?"

"Judging from these injuries, he shouldn't have been."

Raven lifted a sardonic eyebrow,"Judging from these injuries, he shouldn't even have been alive, surprises are running rampant. Please help me clean him up, we can't keep Starfire out forever, and my head can't take her screaming today, the bikeride was tough."

Cyborg looked at her queerly, then went right into pulling out a rag and filling a basin with warm water. He pulled back the blanket Raven had placed over him, and he drew in a sharp breath, the air making a sharp hissing sound over his teeth, "Dear God, Rae, why would anyone do this to another human being?"

Raven had followed in his footsteps and she began to daub off Robin's chest, for of course, his face was almost spotless.

To their surprise, Beast Boy answered, coming up behind them with his own basin, "Slade isn't human."

He joined them in their gentle cleansing of the Boy Wonder.

* * *

Why would Cyborg so suddenly have a craving for her pudding of sadness. She had not thought that he had enjoyed it that much, he had barely taken a bite. Maybe you ate less of some form of sustenance when you liked it on this planet. The theory could have philosophical basings, but that was not the point. Cyborg had told her he wanted the Pudding of the Sadness, so she was going to make it, and make it perfect, well perfectly awful.

"A little more of the Captain's Crunching, and one more of the blue furry sticks of "Booter"." Cyborg was going to enjoy this concoction, she was taking particular care to make it right.

Where was Robin, he would want some of her pudding as well, and she would not want to disappoint him, that would be terrible. She set the pot to boil on the stove, half on and half off of the eye, and went to look for the others.

She went through the living room, she went through the hall beside Robin and Raven's rooms, she went through the hall where she, Beast Boy, and Cyborg lived, no one. Finally, she passed the floor on which the medlab was located, it was on the third floor down while Raven and Robin were on the sixth floor down and Cyborg's lab was on the eighth floor down.

She passed the medlab and stopped three feet passed the door. Starfire looked over her shoulder at it curiously, then she turned around and came back to it. With blythe look of unconcernedness, she twisted the knob and opened the door. "Friends, are you in here, I want to warn you tha..." Her words died a slow and painful death in her throat as she caught sight of what they were doing. Her head cocked to the side like the old dogs on the RCA victor records and she looked very much younger than the fifteen that she was.

"Why are you cleansing friend Robin, and why is he outside of the normal ranges of consciousness?"

Cyborg's mouth bobbed momentarily. However, Raven was standing off to the side when the lightning struck and was able to respond, "Robin fought hard. He's only human. He's tired. So he's sleeping."

Hell, it wasn't a lie, it was just only half of the truth, she could live with that. The cocked head of the Tamaranian switched sides and she levitated forward curiously, her green eyes crinkling in slight question.

Raven gave up the goat, lying couldn't hide obvious truths from the eyes, oh yeah, she wasn't lying.

"Oh I fear that there is more ailing Robin than simple exhaustion, whatever has occurred to taint his flesh so?"

Raven faced her new task firmly while Cyborg and Beast Boy watched in simple awe, like they were taking mental notes, "Do not worry Starfire, calm your emotions, listen calmly and don't make me stop. Robin met with Slade, they fought, Robin survived, he'll be fine." "Oh but surely friend Raven that cannot be.." Raven raised her hand calmly, and Starfire cut off.

"Quiet, go get me some new bandages out of that cabinet. Starfire eagerly nodded her head and flew over to the pointed out storage device, opening the doors and searching frantically for the bandages desired.

Raven turned back to remove the bandages as gently as she could, and found her ward was once more awake. Lord knew how he was popping in and out of consciousness in his condition, the new blood might have had something to do with it, but still he shouldn't be waking for yet a while. His eyes moved slowly over the scene around him above the breathing apparatus shoving air into his nose. Finally they moved over to her and she once more heard the mental link click on like a light switch.

_Raven, where am I?_

She responded mentally, the other two titans were engaged in watching Starfire hunt for the bandages, neither of them thinking to help the poor alien.

_Medlab._

_When did I get here?_

_A little while after you passed out, you gotta teach me how to access medical files, it would have been useful._

_Maybe later._

_Raven._

_Yes, Robin?_

_You were there weren't you?_

_Where?_

_Where I went when I passed out._

_Oh_

_Yes, unfortunately, my mind was dragged in, I had no choice._

_I do apologize, I will have to work on my subconcious cloaking skills._

_Shut the fuck up. That's bullshit and we both know it. _

_How so?_

_It was one of the more disturbing things I have ever witnessed, and it didn't even happen to me, it would rip through a cloak like paper, you and I both know your defenses are already impeccable. Just go ahead and admit you're human so I can change your bandages._

_You that desperate to see me without a shirt?_

_Funny bird boy, at least now I don't have to question you anymore. _

_Yippee._

_Oh, by the way, tough luck, Beast Boy noticed the missing mask, I was hoping for his ignorance to sustain itself, but he saw before Cyborg did. _

_By the way Raven, what _is_ Starfire doing. _

_Trying desperately to find the bandages in front of her. Hold on._

_Right here. _

Raven cut off the link and moved towards the cabinet, knowing without doubt that his eyes followed her.

She stood right next to Starfire, reached across the front of the redhead and grabbed the rather large bright white roll of gauze sitting on the shelf. She wasn't mad, on Starfire's planet, gauze were probably purple and called something like Verblars. "Thanks Star," she said, not unkindly and moved back to Robin. Locking eyes with him as she walked, she saw him brace himself and felt it coming before it happened.

The two geniuses of silence had finally noticed he was awake, "Robin, dude, what are you doing awake, shouldn't you be sleeping off your Slade bender." Cyborg simply looke towards the vitals monitor, it was within healthy reason, "Nice peepers buddy."

Robin blinked at them, turned to Raven, and the authority which he used in her head hit her hard and fast, even in sickness, he never played.

_I still can't talk, so you're going to be my mouth Raven_

She turned to the other three, Starfire jumping up and down, "Oh Robin, I am so glad to see you are awake and no longer of the absent mind, I am most pleased that you live still. Your eyes are quite lovely, of course they are not of the color that I originally hypothesized, but still a nice specimen of human optical or..."

Raven opened her mouth, quieting the jumpy alien, "He can't talk very well, so he'll be using me."

Beast Boy turned to the unmasked wonder, "Cool jumpin' beans, mental chat away."

They all seemed a bit in shock that the eyes that they all had been trying so long to see had so easily been shown to them. They hadn't even caused it. Actually it was rather anti-climactic, but that wouldn't cross their minds until later. Right now, they were all staring unashamedly at the two tone gaze staring back at them.

Faintly, Raven heard Starfire mutter, "Not even a trace of blue."

His voice in her head again, the leader incarnate through the head of his partner.

_Tell them that we need to run up the Tower's security to the maximum. And tell them to keep in contact with each other when they are apart._

_You really think its going to be that bad?  
_

_Slade doesn't like to be disobeyed, it'll be bad._

She thought she saw a minute shudder, but for the moment she chose to ignore it.

"He says that we need to turn the security to the maximum level. And keep in contact with each other when you're in different parts of the tower, leave your com channels open."

Cyborg mimicked Starfire's earlier position by cocking his head and his eyebrow, "What's with all the uber precaution?"

Raven turned to Robin.

_Good question._

_Tell them, I'm not sure if we need it, but I'd rather be on the safe side._

As she turned to deliver the message, she realised with an uncomfortable lurch how good he was at manipulating them all. Most of the time it was for their own good, but in some cases, his talent of deception and misdirection had somehow led them into a position neither he or they wanted to be in.

"He says that he's not sure if we really need it yet, but he wants to be on the safe side."

Cyborg seemed to accept that and he turned to his arm to execute the commands given him. Beast Boy and Starfire took out their comlinks and flipped them on, making sure they were on the same channel.

Raven turned back to the bed, to get more mental directions, and saw something that did not please her.

Robin was moving slowly, but surely towards the edge of the medical bed. His legs were inching under the sheets and he was bracing himself to turn with his arms. "Robin what do you think you are doing?"

_Raven, you're a smart girl, I think you'll figure it out. _

His transmission pulsed like a bad radio with the pain he was inflicting on himself.

_You are in no condition to be walking Bird Boy._

_And yet, I am going to walk, imagine that._

_Smart ass._

_It's not my ass Raven. _

_That I'm not sure about._

He stopped responding and sent all of his mental concentration towards getting out of the hospital bed in which he had been incarcerated. His feet came out from beneath the sheet, pale and oddly small, and he set them on the floor. He sat there for a minute, then pushed himself into a standing position. For a minute, he swayed dangerously in that position, then his resolution seemed to kick in and he stood tall. His costume was only intact from the waist down. The rest hung in useless flaps by his thighs. His skin was pale, not used to sun, just to a protective owner.

He looked down at the i.v. in his arm and the pipe beneath his nose. He grabbed the needle, and yanked it out of his arm without a wince. The pipe was yanked out of his nose. He took off the sensors and looked around.

Starfire and Beast Boy were watching him as though he were made of crystal and someone somewhere was singing a High C. Robin seemed to spot his boots and moved towards them slowly, taking each step with as much stability as he could manage. He reached them. Placing his foot in the left one, he leaned cautiously forward, bracing himself against the wall with his right hand. The left hand reached down and grabbed the edge of the boot, pulling it all the way onto his foot.

He repeated the process with the right foot, and stood all the way up. Once again he tottered for a brief period of time, but he shortly regained his stability and turned to face the other Titan's.

Raven prepared herself to recieve, but he shook his head at her.

His mouth opened and the voice was faint, faint and rusty like his voice was being run over the serrated edges of those annoying little safety scissors that kindergartens seemed so fond of placing in front of their students, "I know that you all are eager to understand why I am the way I am." He paused momentarily, whether for thought or regaining his strength, no one could tell, he continued, "I'm sure there are some other questions as well. I'm going to go down to my room and change costumes, we'll rendevous in the main room in 30 minutes." He bowed to them all, painstakingly, and headed towards the door. Raven didn't let him go without protest, "Damn Bird Boy," she shouted after him, he didn't respond.

The door closed after him, and they were left alone in the medlab. If not for the blaring vital's machine and the blood stains on the sheets, you wouldn't have been able to tell anything had happened.

Outside, in the hall, where he was alone, and without that ever important audience, Robin began panting heavily. Sweat broke out on his forehead and the sight of the hallway was a cartoon character's blurred version.

He just now noticed that he had no idea where Raven had placed his mask. For years, the only thing he could count on was that no matter the circumstances, the mask would be waiting on him. Now, he didn't even know where the cursed thing was. An experience that should have been freeing was instead like bungee jumping for the first time. He had no control over the outcome, and it pissed him off something fierce, not healthy for the public in general.

He stumbled into the elevator, leaning heavily against the metal walls. He leaned his forehead against the cool surface, trying to make his mind stop spinning. Black spots danced in his vision, and every time he breathed a sharp pain seared through his abdomen. But, the team didn't need that worry right now, he would take care of it later. For now, they all needed to be ready for Slade. Now, that he knew Slade had the same goal in mind.

Honestly, the man would never learn. From the moment he was inducted forcefully into Slade's service, he'd seen the threadbare spots in his plan of Robin domination.

Mistake one, instead of choosing someone powerful with a natural tendency towards evil, he had unfailingly chosen the official leader of the **good **side. Mistake two, he was much too paranoid. He had a horrible tendency to trust himself and only himself. He was brutal and abrasive instead of persuasive and slightly accomadating. Mistake three, he, like Robin himself, he supposed, had much too large of an ego. The villain had an inferiority complex the size of Texas. One syllable against his oh so brilliant plans and you were worm chow.

Damn psychotic villains. They were hard on the Titan's medical supplies.


	6. I see the dancing jewelry with my one re...

Importance of Secrecy

Chapter Six

By: Lunatic with a Hero Complex

_Maybe. Maybe he was a grown up in a kids body. Maybe he was a victim of amnesia and not even he can remember where he came from. Maybe he did something that he's really ashamed of. Maybe he's adopted. Maybe he never knew his parents. Maybe he was abandoned. Maybe his parents died. _

_Maybe his parents were murdered. _

_How? How did he end up with Batman. How did he become a vigilante? How did he end up like this? How did he find all the Titans? How did he find me? How did Batman find him? How did he meet Batman? How did Batman meet Robin?_

_How were his parents murdered?_

_Why? Why does he fight like this? Why doesn't he want comfort? Why can't he talk to us? Why does he not let himself heal? Why isn't he in Gotham any more? Why was he there in the first place? Why would a kid so young have such an old look? Why wouldn't he have grown up like most normal kids? Why was his life interrupted?_

_Why were his parents murdered?_

_Maybe. Maybe we can find out. Maybe he has clues. Maybe he'll tell us. Maybe we can get it out of him. Maybe he won't hide anything anymore. Maybe we can snoop around and come up with something. Maybe he'll even tell us who Batman is. Maybe we don't have to try. Maybe he's going to tell us now. _

Maybe he's sick of questions that have no relevance to the situation at hand.

Every single occupant of the couch turned in their seats to look at the doorway. Robin stood there, newly clothed. Only Raven it seemed, did not flinch, and Raven it seemed, had been the only one not talking.

Robin walked down the stairs into the main room with an impressively scarce amount of limping. He stopped in the middle of the area and stared at them all. Even without his eyemask, that face crinkled in anger was fierce and commanded a good bit of respect. "Do you think that I did not know what your questions were for? I am many things, but I take to pride that blind is not one of them. I heard the late night conversations. Did you never think that maybe, it was a secret for a very good reason. A reason intent upon your protection. A reason that I held to with good faith that you would not question. But no, you insisted on prodding into things that were better left to the drawers they were placed in. I have shown you that which I swore I would show no human willingly, breaking an oath years old, and still you contrive to answer questions that are none of your concern.

"All I want to know, is when, for the love of all things good, when will you be satisfied?"

He stopped, as if really expecting the lot of them to quote some emotional quota that would feed their hungry curiosity. When no one answered, he continued, "Now, we have an issue at hand." His face was still hard, but was an edge of softness and diplomacy that always came in when he talked of matters of justice. "Slade. A man we've thought of little, has come back to nip our carelessness. Any ideas?"

The group was slightly awestruck. Never had he outright asked for their plans, it was always his plans with their modifications tweaked in to form something astutely genius, it was a method that worked and they all respected it. Now they were placed on the spot and not even normally mentally volatile Raven could produce something.

"Fine, to start, we have a side issue to attend to." He turned to Raven, he held his hand out. Without a word she handed it to him. "Thank you." He put it on and they found it was very hard to imagine the young eyes underneath.

"Second, do we search him out, or wait for his attack? I believe he would expect us to wait, so I think that maybe we should begin a search for his wherabouts, as he'll probably be moving."

Raven was barely listening. She was looking with sick fascination at the rose blooming at Robin's side. She was not looking at it because it was blooming, that she would have expected, but instead because, despite its expeditious processes, Robin had not met a hitch yet. That is why she was standing next to him the entire time, and that is why she was not surprised when he excused himself after dishing out orders.

That is also why she followed him out of the room and why she was behind him in the hallway. This is the reason why she saw him pitch and yawn in the narrow space like a ship at sea. Which was the direct cause of her trip forward to touch his shoulder.

He spun at her like a British Royal guard, arm raised, mimicing the position he'd taken on the roof. He let it down, "Yes, Raven?"

She spoke to him out of a dream, her eyes almost absent as she looked at him, talking through an ocean, "You need new bandages."

"No such thing, we've got work."

An abstract smile touched the faraway face and she calmly poked the blooming rose, "Uh huh."

He involuntarily bent down and flinched, then stood back up, face vengeful, "Fine, I'll fix it."

He turned to go, but she stopped him with hand, "I don't believe you, let me."

Not waiting for him, she dragged him towards the infirmary.

"I let you out the first time, you were proving something, but now it's just you and me, so sit still and no complaining."

He sat on the white bed and braced himself with his arms, waiting on her instruction. He would obey, but he would make it difficult.

Raven sighed exasperatedly, "Shirt Bird Boy."

Obediantly, he removed the red, yellow, and green thing, let it hang against his legs and placed aside his glove. "Good boy."

Taking the tail end of the bandages, she began to unwind them taking the growing string around and around his torso. Finally, it was all gone. Even though she'd seen it before, the sight of the wounds still made her draw in a hiss over her teeth.

"Not that bad Rae, just rewrap them, I've got things to do."

In a fit of emotion so reportedly rare for her, she slapped him, right across the hard edged, remasked face. Her face did not change, if anything, it got even blanker. But her voice, her voice was something to behold, "Will you just give it a rest, Goddamnit. We all understand that you are the Boy Wonder, undefeatable, world renowned, trained by the great Batman, but you are still human. You get hurt like humans, you bleed like humans, and you have a limited supply of that blood like humans, and you have to rest. You are going to give your body a chance to heal or I will personally contain you in a space that is anything but bird friendly."

Instead of giving in to her lecture like he had previously he grabbed the finger she had precariously pointed at his chest and pulled her face close to his, she hated that she had to do this while he had his mask on. He seemed to grow, and for the first time, she realised how really dangerous he could be. She'd understood the consequences of being a villain in his path or disobeying his orders, but she never thought about having that vengeful sweep directed at her, "You will not slap me again. I understand that I have to heal, but I will do it in my own fashion. Right now, there is a mad man loose that I am responsible for. Despite what you, Raven, have learned about me in the past 36 hours, as far as you are concerned, I am not human. I am nothing else but your leader, and that is what should matter most. I will deal with what I have to deal with how I deal with it, it is not your problem."

He stood up and leaned in closer, and she found her hand moving towards his head. She peeled off the mask. Wide purple eyes that looked at him with a mixture of incredulity, awe, and impartiality.

The brown eye was almost an amber color with the anger in it, but the green one did not seem affected by the feeling behind it.

They were leaning closer, gravitating towards each other without knowledge or consent.

"How did you lose it?"

He withdrew from her personal space, his posture defensive, "Lose what?"

She blinked at him, a sense of loss overcoming her when he moved away.

"Your eye."

Robin began to pull the upper portion of his costume over the taut ridges of his stomach, "Whatever do you mean Raven, as you can see, I have both of my eyes."

"Yes, I can see that, but one of them, the green one in fact, is not made of human flesh, it's cybernetic."

Robin picked up his glove, gently putting it on over the bandage, of course, there was only one, the other hand was almost completely broken. He looked at her cockeyed, curious, "How can you know that? The ability is sheerly amazing."

"It's simple really, living parts give off a certain aura, that eye in itself is giving off nothing. Not to mention, the reaction time is a fraction behind the other."

He snapped his utility belt on and smiled at her, "Very observant, good work."

"It's not that hard."

"Still, well done."

He closed the door behind him.

When it came to her that he was gone, she turned and kicked the infirmary table. He'd done it again, so smoothly it'd slipped just under her radar. Instead of openly avoiding the question, he'd manipulated the conversation until he could get away.

It must have been hell punishing him as a child.

* * *

The whole place was deserted, any remnant of his plans and maps and other paraphernalia were gone. Sighing, he picked up the brand. The only thing besides himself that had not already made the fast paced move to another location.

He had been so close. He'd seen the breaking point in the boys patchworked eyes. He too, wondered how the eye had departed. Despite his domineering take over of everything that Robin was physically, he had not taken over the memories. The masked child was still a mystery to him. Of course, not in some ways, but there were many others.

That would be his next conquest, for he had no doubt that he would once more capture the flighty bird.

The one revealed eye looked down at the 'S' attached to the iron bar. He did have to admit, the boy had endurance. But then again, if he wasn't almost the best, Slade wouldn't have bothered with him in the first place.

The idea that Robin was one of the good guys only made it better. What a singular moment of ecstasy it would be when Slade finally heard the ultimate snap in the boy's head as he fell into the whirlpool of evil. A triumphant day for criminals everywhere.

Walking out into the night air, part of his brain focusing on his surroundings the other part simply reflecting in on itself, Slade was honest with himself. He knew that the Boy Wonder was a dangerous addiction, one liable to cause him more pain than it seemed worth, but it was nonetheless was an addiction. Being the alpha male of his pack assured that Slade would be allowed to indulge his habits until some other alpha male stopped him, or he died from the use.

Hopefully, neither would happen anytime soon.

The masked villain reached down and pried his hands into the grips of a manhole cover, lifting it up and over onto the asphalt of the street. Turning his back to the alley he had just exited, he climbed down the ladder, pausing only to drag the cover back into place by a handle screwed into the underside, then descending into the very bowels of jump city.

Tonight, he would set up a new camp, tomorrow, well, tomorrow was another day.

* * *

Flying. Like the bird he wished he was. Flashing past building tops. The Jump City Savings and Loan passing beneath the metal soles of his boots, at least 10 feet beneath them.

Things were simple when he was here where he belonged. In the air, away from the other people. In the air where he could forget that despite how hard he tried, he was in fact a normal human. Up here, he was exceptional. He was the supernatural being. A bird that couldn't be caught. A soul of vengeance with a purpose.

Jump City was a great deal cleaner than Gotham had ever been, but still it was a dirty city. That's why he'd chosen this as the place for him to branch out from his mentor. A place in need of a hero. He'd come to love Jump City, but countless were the times when he forgot the city and crucified himself at the alter of justice just so he could feel that he was doing something heroic.

Launching his grappling hook at a particularly high building, just to get the leverage he needed, he saw a robbery in progress at the **Jump For It **Jewelry store on 22 and Maple. Wasting no time, and thanking the gods that blessed him so, he jumped down, flipping mid air so he could lessen the pressure on his landing.

He landed on bent knees and ran forward towards the crook that was running towards a Jeep Cherokee, painted black. He launched into roundhouse high kick and the robber was taken by surprise. He went down surprisingly easy, considering that Robin was injured. Diamonds and money spilled across the cracked concrete. Robin chained the unconcious robber to a light post and contacted the police who were already on their way. They would pick him up, and Robin would get the usual slightly grudging thanks.

Gathering the spilled loot into its bag, he checked the status of his prey and took it in to the owner who followed him out into the street. It was an old man of about 65 who looked considerably good for somebody with no teeth and failing sight. "Thank you Mister Titan, I didn't know how I would ever get over the kind of problems losing all of that would have caused me."

Robin smiled at the man. It was people like this that he lived for. People who were depending on him for the happiness in their lives. He could make a difference, these people proved it, "Not at all sir, just doing what I'm supposed to."

The old man may not have been all as blind as he seemed. Something on the young hero's face made him ask his next question. "Mister Titan, would you like to come in for some hot tea? It's cold out tonight."

Robin's head cocked. It was something he wasn't used to. He usually didn't see the people he served after serving them. But it couldn't hurt, public relations and all that. "Sure, and it's Robin, alright."

"Alright si.. I mean Robin, just as long as you call me Nathan." Again, Robin smiled, "That, I think I can do."

The cops arrived seconds later, and carted off our poor misfortunate criminal wannabe, and Robin turned to follow Nathan into the store.

It was a quaint store, nothing like the commercial Friedmans in the Macy's downtown. But still, there were some beautiful pieces to behold in this quaint little place. A yellow diamond about the size of the bottom end of a crayon set in white gold. A sapphire that was bigger than Robin's thumbnail that was attached to a pendant necklace, pearshaped.

Nathan led Robin to the back office where there was a staircase. The leader followed the old man up the stairs and into an even quainter little apartment.

The jewelry salesman pointed to the table in the center of the room and moved towards the counter. Robin sat down and rested his left hand, the one with the broken fingers, on the table. He watched from behind the mask as the man moved with what looked to be a touch of arthritis around the small kitchen.

After setting the water to boil, he joined Robin at the table. For a moment there was silence. Rather awkward, but not necessarily bad. Finally Robin spoke, "Do you have a last name, Mr. Nathan?"

A cracked smile spread over the man's face, knocking away a few years, "Yes, unfortunately I do. Now, don't you laugh, but it's Detroit."

The name didn't register in Robin's mind for a few seconds, then it hit him, "Nathan Detroit. Like in the musical?"

"Yes, like I said, unfortunate, but true. What about you young man, got a last name, or did you like Madonna?"

It was a strange pop culture reference from someone of his age, but was it any stranger that Robin had seen "Guys and Dolls"?

"My last name is Teen Titan, sorry can't tell you more than that."

Mr. Detroit grinned at the boy slyly,"I understand, the land of honor has nothin' to do with order, and everythin' to do with secrecy."

Listening to the water beginning to scream slightly, Robin had to grin back, "Yes, in this business, secrecy is rather important."

Nathan laughed croakily at the statement while he stood up to go get the tea, Robin stopped him, "Let me, you've done enough tonight."

The laugh continued as he sat down grudgingly, "Don' know whatcha mean, all I did was push a red button."

Pouring the water over the tea bags in the mugs, Robin lifted his head, "You've done a lot more than that Mr. Detroit, believe it or not, you've helped to rebuild a falling Titan."

Nathan was opening his mouth to respond when his communicator beeped. Robin held up the gloved hand, "Hold on just one second."

He flipped it open, waiting out the star trek sound, "Robin here."

Raven's face filled the screen, Robin almost winced. He should have known she wouldn't leave it at that, who knew maybe he would get lucky and it was a crisis.

"Robin, where are you, you didn't tell us you were going out."

"Sorry Raven, had to do some patrolling, stopped a robbery, right now, I'm enjoying the company of a thankful citizen. I think you'd like him. Anything wrong?"

"No, just wishing you would follow your own orders."

"Sorry Raven, I'll come back now."

He closed the comLink and turned to Nathan.

"I have to go, the authority of the team calls. But I will have to catch up on that mug of tea with you some time. Good company."

Nathan nodded, standing up to come shake Robin's hand, "Figured as much, judging from the tone of the girl on your little phone thing, thanks again. You wanna talk, you know where I am."

"Lord knows Nathan, I might just take you up on that, I have the distinct feeling times are about to get a little bumpy, a person needs all of the friends he can find."

Then he was gone, out of Nathan's window and up onto the roof. Nathan watched him go, and with a great deal of curiousity and thought he remembered the broken hand and the spot of blood on the boy's costume.

They put burdens on people younger and younger everyday, thank God he'd been born so early.


	7. How do you bandage a cat god?

Importance of Secrecy

Chapter Seven

By: Lunatic With a Hero Complex

You can bandage a gaping wound, but that does not mean it will go away. Only time can heal problems that big. Bleeding will occur, pain will blare, you will have the scar for most of your life. If you wanted instant healing, you'd have to look Merlin's way, and even then, I'm almost sure there'd be a scar.

Nathan Detroit was a beginner's bandage, but it would take many things yet to set things right.

Raven had never met Nathan Detroit, did not, in fact, even know who he was or what his connection to Robin was. Had she known she would've have gained a deep liking for the man and the simple things that his conversation had done for Robin.

As it was, though, she did not know Nathan Detroit even existed off of Broadway.

All she knew was that Robin came back in slightly better spirits than he had started off in.

Still, something was not completely kosher with her non-jewish leader. Though that may be okay if you're not jewish, but that's another discussion.

Despite all of her personal reassurances that nothing would happen right now (Robin was bent on revenge, after that, then she'd worry), her head still imagined all of the wrong things when she couldn't find Robin in the tower.

Soon, she'd quieted the mad rush of outlandish explanations and logically thought of using the communicator, if things were well, it would be with him and on.

Things were relatively well, it was on, it was with him, he didn't ignore her, and he even held banter. Hallelujah, there was a chance.

She was reclined on the couch, not the one that was right now in the process of being thrown out so it could be replaced with a nice, blood free one, but a substitute, brought from the lower entrance room, the thing formally called, "The Reception Hall."

It was stiff, but it had potential for comfort.

Starfire was having an in depth conversation with Beast Boy in the corner by the computers about the difference between a hornet and a horn, and then between a bull's horn and an instrument. It had the makings of a long drawn out discussion.

Last time she'd checked, Cyborg had been in the storage cabinets in the basement, researching Slade's previous weapons at Robin's request, trying to update their defenses to the best of their countering ability.

Raven? Raven was just waiting on a lost bird. A bird that she really needed to talk to. She wasn't completely sure why she needed to talk to him. But one thing was sure in her mind, she did need to talk to him. She wasn't even sure what she needed to talk to him about. She got the distinct feeling that it would come to her when he was in front of her. Hopefully.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a loud ding as the elevator doors opened to let someone out. That someone turned out to be their fearless leader. Robin didn't pause when he entered and headed straight for the kitchen. Much to her surprise, he seemed to be humming.

She managed-due to long years of practice-to hustle gracefully off of the couch, and head towards the tiled place. As she neared the boy with the mysteriously bobbing head (noting with some amount of curiousity that he was humming a show tune) she once again worried about what she would say, though it was somewhat harder to transition to conversation from scolding it seemed like her best route.

She walked behind him as he entered the kitchen nook and opened the refrigerator. All the leftovers had been thrown into Starfire's last batch of sadness pudding so his water was clearly visible. He grabbed the bottle and turned suddenly to Raven, shocking her with the abrupt change of direction. Though, true to form, she remained in place. He opened the water, twisting the top to detach the plastic safety ring. He quirked a masked eye at her, "Can I help you?"

Here it was, her chance to come up with something biting, yet witty to retort with, and then her brain would know what she needed to talk about, and all would be well in Raven land, he would lose that half assed cheeriness, and her head would sleep easier, right after she installed the air conditioning in hell.

Instead of going in the direction of friendly banter, she went for the jugular, the game of bull shit had officially come to a grinding conclusion, "I know that you are our fearless leader, but I wouldn't expect you to hold yourself above the rest of us when you give an order. After all, you out of all of us, have the most reason to fear Slade."

The eyemask dropped. The water found itself placed oh so gently on the counter. Though she knew this behavior did not bode well, she also knew that she had accomplished something, she'd made him deal, however minutely with his situation.

The boy calculated, coldly, precisely, but he never was an emotional marvel.

Stemming the flow in his own neck, he turned the primitive sharpness of his teeth upon Raven's, and it stung, she had released him and now, the animal was making her pay, "I figured I would learn from my teammates, I faced my demons, instead of ..." he looked at her pointedly, "caging them up."

They stood there in the aftershock of their attack. And Raven realised for the first time that they were not alone. Apparently, Beast Boy and Starfire had been as excited by Robin's return as herself and had followed them into the kitchen, only to watch the vicious feathers fly.

Robin nodded at them, grabbed his water, and Raven's wrist, and walked out of the kitchen.

Beast Boy and Starfire, stood next to the counter, one with confusion spread innocently over her face, one looking suspiciously at the capes disappearing around the corner.

* * *

Never, had she seen such an open display of recklessness. He'd locked the door, he knew she could blast it into Hong Kong if she got the notion, but he didn't care. Leaving her standing there beside the door, he'd strode to the center of the room where his favorite punching bag was positioned. It had duck tape all over it, covering spots where his fury had outlasted the fabric.

Peeling the upper half of his costume off and throwing the cape on a rack of weights, he'd begun assaulting it. Unlike that fateful day on the roof, this was not a graceful practicing of position. This was primitive defense. He was sweating, he was panting, and his eyes, (which he'd unmasked without a word, he did it more now, it seemed) were fierce. The bag was never stll, he attacked it with a barrage of punches, kicks, knees, any way he could cause the inanimate object pain, he was employing. Though somewhat frightening, his body was beautiful in motion, like one of the gods of mythology, only it glistened under arc sodiums, not sunlight. After a particularly nasty jab at it with his left foot, he turned from it towards her, and he strode in her direction.

For a moment, it looked like he was going to replace the punching bag with her, but he stopped three feet in front of her.

All this time she hadn't moved, not from this spot, she'd just watched him. The thought fleeted through her head that perhaps that had been rather stupid, then courage took over, and she realized she needed to talk to him, so she just stood her ground.

He stood there looking at her angrily, then his features melted into a look of resignation and he asked her weakly, "Why?"

Her mind blanked on her, of all the things she'd expected to hear him say, this was not one of them. Not finding in her mental stores what 'why' he was talking about, she answered a question with a question, "Why what?"

He closed his mouth, fists balled tightly by his hips, licked his lower lip and tilted his head down exasperatedly before looking at her again, "Why won't you let me run my course. Can't you just stop interfering? Do you know, Raven that I have been Robin for five years, and in all that time, you are the only one I have ever wanted to know my secrets. That includes Batman. The only person. And do you know, Raven, that right now, I wish I was just all alone again in my little world, where no one cares and no one interferes. But then again. I don't think I can ever go back. Over the past few hours, since ... I have conciously felt myself wishing I could tell you everything. About what it was like before, about why I chose green instead of brown, about my mother..." He locked eyes with her, and she felt that same shiver up her spine, "But I can't, and it hurts, so will you please just back the fuck off, before you find yourself trapped under something you didn't bargain for."

He'd said the last part so softly, she almost hadn't heard him. He bowed his head again, pushed a button on his infamous utility belt, that made the doors click as they unlocked, and turned back to the punching bag. She could see the muscles in his back tensing to go back into battle.

That had been almost the equivalent of verbally dismissing her, but she didn't take the offer.

She stood there, blinking at him, feeling mentally windswept. In a bout of unnatural instinct, she walked across the gym to his tensing body, grabbed him by the shoulder, turned him around, and kissed him.

It felt strange to the sensible part of her brain to be standing here kissing her leader dead on the mouth, the leader that she often took orders from. But the rest of her brain cared nothing for the logic, and when he kissed her back, it actually rejoiced. Where the sound the mouth made could be harsh, the actions of it were soft and respectful. He was more gentle then it seemed his nature would suggest. After a few seconds, she felt his hands find their way around her waist, strong hands use to the hard steel of a bo-staff, but yet, being oh so very careful with her soft flesh. Soon, he was dominating the kiss and she had gladly relinquished control.

Too soon, however, they were pullling apart, both of them almost in a state of shock.

Raven was in wonder at her choice of action. Robin, however, was floating on a completely different wavelength. He looked terrified. He backed away from her, fingers on his lips, eyes wide and working. It almost looked like he was in the room with his worst fear and he couldn't get out.

But, the shockers had yet to finish their barrage. The fear melted into utter confusion. Robin started talking, but not to her. Not to anyone in particular. "No, not again, its not safe. But I love her, isn't that worth it. Do you remember what happened to the last person I loved? Yes, but this is different, she can take care of herself, and I'm able to defend her now, not like her. Still, do I really wanna take that chance, I'm not able to stop everything."

Though Raven was admittedly reluctant to believe that he was indeed talking about her, it became obvious that there was no other candidate. So, she did what she knew how to do, she issued closure on mental issues.

"You aren't taking the chance, I am."

Robin's head snapped up from the in depth conversation he was having with himself, and his eyes locked on Raven. Somehow, though the sight was rather startling, Raven didn't find her self frightened by the fire in Robin's eyes, she was thrilled.

Those eyes became solid, became sure.

That body became the body of a predator, tightly coiled, almost cat-like.

It advanced.

He was in front of her, she found herself helplessly silent. In awe. So that's why he wasn't emotional, this kind of emotion would short out the tower on a regular basis.

He cupped her head between the two lithe powerful hands, he looked straight at her, "I will not break my own wings, nor yours."

Robin captured her in another kiss, swift, powerful, gentle no more, but not unpleasant.

He bit her lower lip, leaving two tiny puncture wounds, and sucked on them until she couldn't feel the pain through the haze in her brain. She wound her hands around his neck, and he lowered his mouth to her neck. Raven rubbed her head against his and returned the favor, laying small kisses along his shoulder until she reached the round muscle at the arm joint, where she delivered a small bite.

Robin immediately brought his head up to capture her mouth again.

This was going somewhere fast, and it was a wonderful ride.


	8. Sailing through the wonders of modern ae...

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter Eight

By: Lunatic with a hero complex

Slowly, oh so slowly, they were backing up towards the pile of mats in the corner, never once concentrating on anything other than each other. Raven was engrossing herself in the angles of Robin's jaw, while Robin was moving Raven's leotard to access her neck and shoulders.

Raven's back hit the mirrored wall that the mats resided against. Robin turned her back towards the mats and lowered her gently on to them. Capturing her mouth in another kiss, he reached behind for the button on her leotard, her cloak lying discarded somewhere mid-gym.

Never moving her mouth from Robin's, Raven blindly let her hands roam over his back, memorizing the muscled plane. Her hands were just straying to his still clothed hips when the intercom came on and Cyborg's voice blared through the tower... including the gym, "All Titans report to the main room immediately."

Their mouths were ripped apart as both of their heads snapped up in surprise at the urgent tone.

Then, gods curse it, reality reappeared. They both seemed to realize exactly where they were.

Where they were, was lying down on a stack of gym mats, Raven imprisoned between Robin's arms as they supported him. His body lay flush against hers and at this moment, her arms were intertwined around him. Not to mention that her leotard was a hairsbreadth from being pulled completely off.

For a moment, they were frozen, torn between continuing on their chosen path, forgetting all other things, and backing away from each other, reclothing, and being Titans.

The latter choice obviously was the stronger willed.

Almost in a spider-like way, Robin crawled backwards, and off of her, all elbows and knees, trying not to touch her in an inappropriate manner. It was almost funny. Not the way in which he crawled, but the fact that he was now straining for propriety when seconds before he had had his mouth on her neck, and his hand on her back.

Yes, amusing.

But her tantalizing dilemma on whether she should laugh or feel awkward would have to wait.

She buttoned up her leotard behind her back, while Robin pulled the costume up over his chest. Once he had it secured in it's place, he went to retrieve the cape and eyemask, the final steps before the gloves came on.

After a silent eternity in which the gym sounded like no one inhabited it, they were reclothed, somewhat less flustered, and standing in front of the exit door. Robin ran his hand quickly up through his hair, and Raven hoisted her hood over her head, and they marched, ladies first, into the hall.

What they either failed to notice, or left unmentioned was the spider-webbing cracks in the wall mirrors. Sometime during their escapade, black telekinesis had spread thinly over the surface of it, and it had cracked, like a bottle in extreme cold after coming away from extreme heat.

Yes, amusing.

* * *

Cyborg typed away on the Titan computer, bringing up information restricted to vigilantes and police officers. Starfire and Beast Boy were looking over each of his shoulders, trying to absorb the information as it went by in a rush, automatically logging itself into Cyborg's mechanical brain.

The amber and green titans looked up expectantly when the elevator once more dinged, and opened, allowing Raven and Robin to walk swiftly out.

To Beast Boy, they both looked a little flustered, but they hadn't looked in good spirits when they left, maybe they had gotten into a tussle.

Beast Boy's mind winced, he used the word tussle, scary.

Cyborg finally looked up from the flood of information, "About time, I've been waiting for over 5 minutes, Robin look at this."

He typed something into the keyboard and moved to the left. Robin leaned down to look, his eyemask narrowed, he gasped, "No!"

Cyborg nodded grimly, "Yes, at about 1:30 this afternoon. About 20 people, all over the deck." Robin's eyemasks were almost down to slits"Any witnesses"

"About 15, light day at the docks, just a few workers." "And"

"Nothing, they just remember looking up and then running."

Raven, normally calm, had been emotionally strained almost past her limit on this day of days, and she was becoming impatient, "Will someone please explain what has occurred," of course, it was just another monotone sentence, but Cyborg, nonetheless turned to her immediately, "At about 1:30 this afternoon, a cargo ship came up on the docks, right through them towards the land, went about 100 feet before the land finally stopped it. When the police got on board, all of the crew were on the deck, slaughtered, not a one of them left alive, not even the captain."

Her face didn't change.

Robin immediately turned towards the door, wincing as he did. When she had been roaming his skin, she'd hit all the bandages, but then, that hadn't mattered, now he was going to be sore. But as far as the other members of the team were concerned, that was because he had been tortured by a madmen, it was not suspicious.

"We're are going to the scene immediately, we are already behind the times, and the sight is growing cold, Titans Go."

Then, he was gone.

Cyborg got up and followed.

Beast Boy left the window, with a muffled,"Keep your tights on."

Starfire, blinked, and flew out after him.

Raven left last, still trying to cool the rampant heat in her cheeks.

* * *

It looked like a beached whale. A gigantic animal made of gleaming hungry metal. It must have been going at least 40 knots when it hit. There was a short scraped out track behind it, and the dirt bled up the bow like pleading damned souls. In the dark, it looked alive. Better yet, something once alive and now dead, and likely to return at any moment, enraged with death and ravenous.

But to Robin, it was a part of life, these ghosts. It was, as he thought in his secret mind, the counterpart to himself. Instead of dying and screaming on as though alive, it died, and became a great beast, slouching in the dark, waiting to gain a companion to consume.

Enough, though, with the introspective. Right now, he had a job to do, he would think like this later.

The leader of the Teen Titans walked carefully across the boards of _The Marx Brother_, almost daintily, avoiding the bodies. The other Titans now stood by the railing, having long ago abandoned trying to see what the eyemasks saw. It was useless to try, what he saw, he wasn't saying yet, and they wouldn't see it, until he pointed it out. They weren't degrading themselves, but he had been trained to see the things their minds naturally passed over, and they couldn't catch up so soon.

They were talking gently with the Commissioner, a recently elected man by the name of Rakes, nice enough, a little green in the way things were done in Jump City, but wizened enough by age to know how things were done in life. Suddenly while they chatted, occasionally glancing at the yellow cape, Robin dropped from their line of vision. Their attention was immediately caught.

Robin had dropped to an Indian style position next to a body near the steering quarters. His head cocked back and forth for a moment, an RCA Victor dog, then, his hand dived nimbly into the pockets of the unfortunately deceased.

When it came out, there was a wallet in it. He flipped it open with a flick of his wrist. He read it, nodded his head, as if confirming something already suspected, and stood up.

He walked over to them, his mouth set in a brittle straight line.

He looked up at them, then tilted his head down to read from the wallet.

"Randy Wallis. Age 32. Height 5' 4" Weight 200 lb.

Assistant researcher, Arbor Heights Genetic Plant."

The entire group, save Beast Boy, Starfire, and Robin, gasped.

Cyborg's mouth worked like a marooned fish.

Commisioner Rakes quirked an eyebrow a mile high.

Raven looked at Robin, "What in the name of Azar would he want to clone?"

Robin looked back at her, everyone else hung on his answer, "Me."

He shuddered, and only Raven knew why.


	9. Bottlecaps and shotglasses

The Importance of Secrecy

By: Lunatic with a hero complex

Chapter Nine

Obsession.

Its such a bad sounding word.

Yet great liars would be made of over a third of the population were it to be restricted to villains, lunatics, and murderers.

Obsession is part of everyday life. A goal is identified and hell nor high water will obstruct the obtaining of such goals.

Robin could understand obsession. Perhaps that was why he never fully acknowledged Slade's, because he could identify and he hated having anything in common with the bastard.

Yes, he could understand obsession.

Obsession was to some degree, normal.

But this had leveled up the thermometer at a hot day in hell and surpassed reason.

Arbor Heights Genetics' claim to fame was their recent breakthrough in cloning the first qualifiable, intelligent, human specimen.

The faces of their top scientists had been regular fixtures on all of the news channels. It was the "vogue" conversation of the moment.

The boat so mercilessly attacked had been bringing those scientists and their equipment back to America.

In recent years, economic situations made it cheaper and... simpler to carry on researching and testing overseas. Now that their work had met with so much success, the former economic situations no longer seemed so dire.

This apparently, had been the opportunity Slade was looking for.

In all truth, the opportunity was probably just a bonus. That kind of man would've navigated all the way to Istanbul to achieve satisfaction. This time, he'd only had to go as far as Jump City Docks.

Lucky him.

Though only Raven knew it, Robin had come very close to breaking into hysterics.

Crying.

Screaming.

The loss of something very precious. Something, despite all recent injuries, still intact.

Composure.

But that dangerous time had only lasted about 30 seconds.

Now, composure remained, but something was still wrong.

The past few days had been an experience akin to that of a horror film.

Life and worry were like that.

You start off comfortable. Smiling and holding on to the cord of existence. Life progresses. The cord in your hands starts to kink up. Further and further does your weary wandering progress. The cord now has tangles in it.

And then you reach the final stage of the nightmare, the worst part, the part that Robin's life most closely resembled at the moment. You look down at your cord of existence and you find that the tangles and kinks have found their way around your throat and your wrists. You go to move and the tangles only get tighter. You struggle to breath watching as your skin turns purple. You are helpless to stop it. But it never ends. Death does not come. You just go on strangling until something better comes along.

The plan of course made sense to Robin. The man had his blood, enough to restock a hospital. All he had needed was the equipment. Well, and the people that worked it.

The question now, was why? Now that he had shown he could have the real one so easily, why waste time?

Maybe Slade had learned from his mistakes, but did not want to give up the object of his obsession.

Keep the body, save the look, but please, for the love of Lucifer, do something about that pesky defiance.

Not to mention, how much harder would it be to fight and jail himself than a criminal behind a mask.

Social Confusion.

Inner Hesitation.

Perfect Submission.

The latest model Robin, fresh off of the assembly line.

He would, however, bear a striking difference from pseudo-Robin.

Fake eyes were not an inherited trait. The poor sap would be born with, scratch that, produced with two, big, long lashed, brown eyes.

A curse on the male side of the family.

Now, of all the things he never thought he would think, he was glad he'd shown the group his eyes.

Having to tell the difference between two identical Robins could be potentially difficult, an identifying trait like eye color could be the difference between trust and lynching.

That was he, the Boy Wonder, always planning for the potential betrayal of his friends.

What a wonderful life he led.

* * *

Though she had no intention of letting on, Raven had been more horrified than they knew. Petrified even. Only she, out of the entire group, knew what interest Slade _really_ had in Robin. It was not something she would like to think about. Not only was it sickening to think that an obsession had gone this far, but she felt terrible for the human life that would be brought into this world with a clean soul, and the first thing that would happen would be its destruction.

A clean soul with all of the genetic information and opportunities of the real Robin, and yet none of the good moral influence. Unless, of course, they could stop his creation. Which would be harder than it seemed, they couldn't just sneak in a push the off switch on something like this, they would have to find the hideout, find the machine, find the kill button, and push it.

But she would worry about that later.


	10. School work with a communicable disease

Importance of Secrecy

Chapter Ten

By: Lunatic with a hero complex

What once were nightmarish images of his time in captivity became stormy standoffs between himself and a brown and black clad doppleganger. Slightly less graphic, but nonetheless a frightening prospect to dream of. This of course was worsened by the truth of their origins. But his nightime dreams were his concern, not that of the rest of the Titans. Even though they had seen him incapacitated, their dependence on him had not lessened.

"Robin the Boy Wonder" was a silent, constant, axis in the life of the Teen Titans. They never really thought about that presence until it was jarred. So, he would jar it as little as possible in such a delicate situation. His initial frenzy to keep them all on red alert had died down. Slade didn't want them. Not at all. Of course, he enjoyed watching them run around and try to stop the horrors he created, but they were secondary pleasures.

So, now, his main want, as leader, was to get the Titans calmed down and let himself be prepared for anything. Business as usual.

That's why he was in his room, trying to plan something. He'd come in here after reassuring the Titan's that he'd overreacted. They were at usual activities downstairs now. Of course, everyone, except Raven, who wouldn't let him just drop it if his life depended on it, which he sometimes felt it did.

She had assigned herself to be his unofficial psychologist, and she tried at every turn to pry some new undiscovered secret from his past. Though somewhat unnerving, his Freudian side told him he liked having someone who thought about him when he faded into the background.

Lately, Robin had begun to lose full sight of the righteous image he had created for himself in the beginning. That same Freudian side that liked that someone cared, had become darker, less and less concerned for the social well being, and more and more bitter. Sarcastic, caustic, scalding. It burnt the fingerprints off of the old Robin and created the new, dulled version. The one that ravaged Raven in the gym. The one that imagined using Slade's own toys to discover the literal inner workings of the mad man's body. To watch the heart beat its last before Robin ripped it out bare handed, and stepped on it.

But Robin the Boy Wonder would never do that.

That wasn't the heroic way.

Speaking of Robins that didn't exist, where was Raven? Abandoning the plans and research lying dustily on his reordered desk, Robin stood and walked to his door, pushed the button, and stepped out into the hallway.

He wasn't worried or anything, but he liked having a handle on his team's whereabouts at all times, it made it much easier to take action if something was to happen to one of them.

He strolled, casually, yet firmly down the hallway, the infinitesimal sign of a limp hanging around his gait like a bad spirit. He had replaced the glove on the broken hand and now the only thing that shone of the horrible condition he had been in not a week ago was that aura like limp. The mask of course, was firmly in place.

A flurry of keystrokes, a pause, a few more keystrokes, and then a swift click on the mouse. Immediately the machine in front of her began to whir in its innards, clicking and grinding towards her goal. She waited, the page appeared.

A stunned moment.

1,243,345 matches.

Scrolling, scrolling, scrolling.

Most of them fansites, message boards, digital shrines. Even a few fanatical sites that seemed wholly devoted to creating intersuperleague incest. Not what she wanted.

Finally, after scrolling for 3 pages, she struck Gotham gold.

She clicked.

She scanned.

_Gotham Journal: circa 2000_

_Written by: Laura Majors_

_Batman. An entity that every man, woman, teen, and infant have come to accept into their lives as though he were an uncle, rarely seen, but always there. Yet, there is so much more to the enterprise of the Dark Knight than just that one man. _

_Over the many years that Batman has been defending and reigning in the Red City, there has been a steady stream of sidekicks that appear by his side, fight for a while and then disappear to make way for the next generation. And still we know as much about these protege as we do about Batman himself. Almost nothing. If not for the varying lengths and shapes of their bodies, we would have no idea that their identities even changed. _

_Three Robins, one Batgirl. One Robin dead, one broken away to become his own self. And the latest model, a 5'4" whirling ball of justice, this Robin is just as mysterious as the last. _

_Or is he. _

_Gotham has two major reigning men. The man in leather, and the business mogul. Batman and Bruce Wayne. One defends the city, the other employs it. _

_But perhaps they have more in common than just goodwill towards the public. _

_The timeline that the parade of bird apprentices follows seems to run consistently along side the benevolent and persistently male adoptions that Bruce Wayne seems to find attractive. Three boys adopted and raised by Bruce Wayne. Three Robins fighting and aiding Batman. _

_Jason Todd, Richard Grayson, Timothy Drake. _

_Is there a pattern, is this something that Gotham City should look closer at, or should we just let the quietness rest. _

_The world fears secrecy, but it is important, it is the key to many vital bloodlines of modern life. This is not meant to be an expose' just a look. A glimpse at what could be going on in the heroic mainstream of the urban landscape. _

Click.

Drag.

Copy.

Click.

Click.

Paste.

Wasn't it indeed strange how far she was willing to go to end the mystery that was beginning to drive her mad.

Very strange.

Yet understandable. It was an addiction. No, an obsession. Every new answer, new glimpse only made her want to understand more, to know more. To ask more questions.

"Raven?"

She almost showed startlement. He'd snuck up, silently, and he probably hadn't even been trying to sneak. Trying to not fumble, she x-ed out of the windows, and saved the page on Microsoft Word to her harddrive. She turned, "Yes, Robin?" Deadpan, good girl.

"Did you find something useful?"

Another of those nightmarish moments like the one in the elevator that fateful day that felt like an eternity ago, where she was sure Robin knew exactly what she had been doing, and then she realized he was talking about Slade, silly girl.

"A few interesting details about his previous crimes, and some gory pictures of his victims, but nothing we can use to catch him. Nothing we didnt' already know about him."

"We'll keep searching, no one is completely anonymous."

"Well, maybe no one is, but Slade is at the top of the heap leaning closest to complete obscurity. And we must remember, no one notices everything. Its not all about what we see and what we know, its about what we feel, and how far we are willing to go."

"Then we don't have a problem."

"And why is that?"

"Because, Raven, the distance I'm willing to go is almost apocalyptic, and if that's what matters, then I'm in the right business."

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

Silence

Mask.

Violet.

Standoff.

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

Bomb rigged flowers and contact.

Her fingers, long, pale, gripping the taut strings behind his head.

A glove flitters to the ground.

His fingers, strong, rough, pale, ridiculously gentle while forcing their way through purple hair.

A desperation only known in silence, one word and the world shatters. Heroes do not shout in desperation, they fight, they struggle, they grip in desperation. Despair is the cause of justice. A kiss yes, but the kiss is only an extension of a hug, a groping for any warm body in the general vicinity of yourself.

An alarm, red, loud, urgent.

The fire in the flowers fades, the brown eye widens its pupil.

Seperation.

"Slade."

The desperation is lost and the despair moves on.

Therapy is for people who wear jeans, and logo t-shirts, and who attend charity events for the betterment of mankind.

Heroes can't afford therapy.

Its bad for their fight ethic.

How do they win if the fire is tamed.

Easy, they don't. So heroes don't adapt, they feed their problems, they let them grow and eat at flesh. They teach them the pathways of human behavior, because in the end, the perfectly adjusted hero who is content with life has nothing to fight for, and if you don't have anything to fight for, then you don't fight hard. If you don't fight hard, you lose.

Psychopaths either become heroes or villains. It all depends on the way you're brought up.

Nature versus nurture what wins. Neither. It's a combination. And when the world comes to a halt, it will be the divisions of psychopaths that decides the fate of the rest of the population. If the villains win, then the world will fall. If the heroes win, they will fade back, and the world will continue, to wait for the next earth wrenching battle. For heroes have nothing to do if they can't fight the bad guys.

The alarm blared on in a lonely manner for a few moments, then they seperated and ran for the main room, down the hall from the library.

They were the first in the room, and Robin rushed to the computer, entering keystrokes and watching the computer screen. The red dot singled in at the docks, then appeared at four other key points in the city.

The docks.

The mall.

The hospital.

The clubbing district.

Cadaver Row.

Four epicenters of public activity and the lowest, most dangerous area in Jump City. Where people went to get things that you couldn't buy at the store. Where you only went if you knew someone there or if you knew how to defend yourself.

Robin typed, scanned, typed somemore,and turned. "There are attacks at all of these points, reports of robots, no extensive damage to the populace, but plenty of damage to the property."

Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Starfire entered then, and Robin began speaking before they completely halted, "Robot attacks at four areas of the city. Starfire take the docks. Cyborg the mall. Beast Boy go to the hospital. Raven you take the club district. And I'll take care of Cadaver Row.


	11. Strangulation by Halter Top

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter 11

By: Lunatic with a Hero Complex

Decay is a torturous thing, that refuses to happen all at once and get on with it. It eats away at its chosen victim slowly, like a cancer. Picking at tiny places of vulnerability until everything is vulnerable. Nothing is lovely. All that once was good, whole, and healthy becomes putrid and rotten.

We fight decay no matter how natural it is, just the same way we fight the natural processes of death. We hate change, and we despise helplessness. We love control, and we adore power. Death and decay give neither to humans, in fact except for their roles as the subjects of the processes, humans are excluded completely from the acts of decay, and the art of death.

Nonetheless, we do fight it.

But decay is almost impossible to stop.

Cadaver Row was the perfect exhibit of decay's refusal to kill swiftly. Human life still pulsed there, but the streets, the homes, the people, were slowly falling beyond the radar. Every apartment building held the tired, worn out look of a dead body on the medical students operating table, stones were missing, windows were replaced with tin foil, and grammatically incorrect legends such as **_"Bango Skank sucks ass" _**and **_"The Choppers kill dead" _**decorated the building faces.

Children played in demolished remains of the once nicer buildings, parading their dolls through mounds of broken glass and rotting greystone.

And people went out for 15 minutes at the most, the only people out their longer were the ones that the others feared. Cadaver Row was not a nice place.

But it was still a place where people lived and that was all that mattered to Robin, all that should matter. Less than moral they may be, but Robin was there to defend the people, not judge them.

The robots were in military formation, marching on the darkest section of the city. Destroying the already run down buildings, and intimidating people into small frightened clumps. But they were not running unchecked. Some of the rougher inhabitants of the area were shooting at the brown and black minions, and some of them were going down, but for the most part the armor was bullet proof. Robin swung in immediately, and knocked down a robot on the downward arc.

Despite the good, wholesome, kindhearted appearance of the victims that the press video taped the Titans saving, there was an equal number people saved that were just like the ones Robin stood face to face with now. Relatively clean as far as clothes went, however, it stopped there. They had dirty fingernails and dirty looks. They were never open and friendly, but they needed help just like almost every other human on the face of the earth. Usually they could be found mocking the likes of Robin when times were low, but when things such as this arose, the mocking went away and there was a kind of hazy alliance. He could tell by the bright blue bandannas that these were the oh so famous "Choppers." The last time he'd dealt with them, someone else had been in control, however, he feared nothing, the new leader would not break their feeble truce.

As he tried carefully to avoid the bullets aimed at the robots, he made his way to the core of the resistance, knocking androids out of commission as he went.

He finally landed in a standing position next to the new leader, identified by his forefront ringed position. Robin sent a fan of birdarangs out, and talked to the 18 year old beside him without looking, "How long have they been here, Jesus?"

The man beside him also didn't look back, "About an hour and a half, ese, what took you so long?"

Robin hid an exasperated sigh as he answered, "The alarm must have been a little delayed. I apologize."

Jesus smiled, revealing a singular gold cap in the lower set of his teeth, "No harm no foul Homes, just let us get this done with man."

Robin nodded and launched himself back into the crowd of androids.

He took the running start and jumped, putting both feet into the chest of an android, he let that momentum carry him upwards and he jumped again, spinning mid-air to land a left kick on the head of a robot. He finally hit the ground and extended his bow-staff, shoving it first into the joints of the robot in front of him, and then into the robot behind him, lifting the staff up in the front to lift the robot on it, and then slamming it down. Then he turned and kicked the robot behind him, sending it skidding along the asphalt.

The Choppers behind him took the cue and began shooting the hell out of the ones that Robin downed. If they hit the streets, then bullets hit them.

There were approximately 50 androids marching on Cadaver Row, with no seeming purpose and with no cargo. They seemed pointless, and yet they also appeared to be terribly determined. Robin was turning to address a different clump of androids when a blunt weight came down on the back of his head.

He turned around, and his eyes stayed open just long enough to see the twinkle of the sun on a gold tooth, and then the darkness overtook him.

Cadavers are neither good nor evil.

Raven stared exasperatedly at the entire species of extremely short skirts and bright tops that populated the clubbing district of Jump City. An hour ago, maybe more, these bodies were dancing and grinding at each other in a desperate grope for warmth and contact. Now, they were still groping desperately for contact, but now, it was to find comfort from the cold, hard, metal robots marching through the warehouses and streets that formed the social region of Jump City.

Raven felt a deep bitterness for these couples, attached to each other in fear, bitterness for the things she could probably never have. The windows of all the warehouses were shattered, and the doors were all dehinged. The robots seemed to have no purpose, or none that Raven could see, but then again Slade was never completely clear in his motives, usually if he didn't want you to know, you wouldn't, not until the trap was upon you.

She had taken immediate action upon her arrival in the area, after getting what information she could from a shaking 17 year old girl in a skirt that could be underwear and a shirt that almost didn't exist. The clubbers hadn't even tried to resist. There was one dead man in "The Harlem Harem" a club on the corner of 63rd and Took, apparently his skull had been crushed in when he was thrown against the wall.

She had hoped for this to be a zero fatality instance, but now she just had to salvage the rest of the people. She closed her eyes for a fracion of a second and flexed her wrists out meditatively and let the ebony mass of her power reach out and encase a small group of the androids. When around 8 of them were covered in the dark bubble, she crossed her wrist and then jerked them apart quickly. The robots trapped by her power fell into spare parts, and she turned to concern herself with the rest of them. Just as she was about to tear the next group apart, a wave of nausea and pain swept through her head and stomach. She sank to her knees and her eyes slipped closed. For just a moment she thought she saw the yellow twinkle of sunlight on gold, and then, she passed out.

Decay is a slow process. And rarely is it pleasant. But often it is a process weathered out in company. We feel the waters begin to slip over our heads and we grip tightly to the nearest arm, and hold on for dear life. We scream with our entire beings that NO! We are not yet ready to go, and we plead PLEASE! help me, hold me, save me, dragging down our nearest and dearest in our fight for life.

This may not be the most morally correct form of survival, not even the smartest. Bit it is the human way. It is what we do, it is the nature of the bonds we share. When we attach ourselves to another human being we share with them the entirety of our moral peril, our psychological luggage, and our terrible personality traits. It is never pretty. It is rarely fairytale like. And there is an ice cube's chance in hell that it is ever even remotely easy.

We are the drudgery of the world, and we are somewhat proud of it, less noble than animals, more restircted than insects, softer than spiders, and too complex to be ameoba. We are stupid, we are lazy, we think too much, and worst of all, we are desperate. So, do we end the human race? Do we stop the madness that we are? Of course not, because, drudgery or not, we are necessary to the chain of life on earth and balance, balance is almost everything. The only other thing that matters is life itself and even that barely blips on the radar.


	12. I got paid in ink, but baby it was cheap

Importance of Secrecy

Chapter 12

By: Lunatic with a hero complex

A home full of happy people is a beautiful thing, it glows, it seems to posess a life, a vivacity of its own. But a home deserted, that is a thing that makes up the stuff of nightmares. Windows dark, rooms quiet. Everything appears so empty and the walls appear so thin that you think to yourself that maybe, just maybe, if you blew real hard, they would fall over.

Some might believe that a home as large as the Tower could never truly posess such a fragile spirit, but it is nonetheless true that this is how it appeared as all of the inhabitants were off fighting mechanical menaces. Dank, and unloved. As if it knew at this moment, that not all of its children were completely safe. That one of them would not return this night.

Perhaps it did know.

They were high tech materials after all.

Her eyes blinked open, injured by the harsh false glow of the lights in the night club. It looked like the "Jack Rabbit."

But at that moment, the split second after she registered the fact that she was awake, nothing could be farther from her mind than the name of the night club she was in. Raven of Azaroth did not experience massive head pains without physical cause every day. And she had the distinct feeling that the pains had not been her own.

For the strangest reason, the image that would not stop flashing on and off in her head was Robin, that one singular line of blood flowing from the mouth down the otherwise pristine surface of his face. It did not bode well. Generally, when Raven's head insisted on telling her something, that something was probably right. And if that was now the case, then Raven needed to be gone right now.

Only now did she turn her head to the environment arouind her. An environment entirely devoid of androids. The only evidence that remained were the destroyed buildings, the destroyed robots, and the dead man.

Their sudden absence only confirmed her far too depressing suspicions.

Honestly, if that Damn Bird Boy coul not keep out of trouble, she was going to attach a tracking device to his neck so she could find him at any time. The communicator just wasn't cutting it, and she was sick of the savior shit. Not that she wanted him dead or anything.

Oh hell.

That wasn't the point.

The damn point was that his physical health could not take too much more duress and she was going to kick his ass if he died. She was not having it by Azar.

Pushing her way out of the crowd of partiers that had gathered around her unconcious form, she headed for the door, she had to search for him now. She was startlingly aware of the sudden obsessive concern for his welfare, his safety, and she seemed suprisingly unconcerned about its intensity.

Once out of the crowded quarters, she pulled out her communicator and pushed the page button, using it to pull attention from Cyborg, Beast boy, and Starfire.

She wasn't expecting Robin to respond.

Three slits of viewing appeared on her screen, android, alien, animal.

Cyborg- "Yo?"

Starfire- "Yes?"

Beast Boy- "Yeah dude?"

Raven ignored the chorus of inquiries and launched right in, "I'm going to take a wild stab and say that just moments ago, the androids in your assigned area miraculously turned tale and marched away. I'm also going to take a dive and say that none of you has tried to contact Robin, or has tried, and could not reach him. If at any time I am wrong, please tap the buzzer."

Cyborg took the task of speaking for them all, "Yeah, how'd you guess? We were fightin' and then they all just stopped and left. And Robin's communicator doesn't even seem to be on."

The other two nodded, like obedient students, and Raven let the words drift into her ear, and sink into her brain, only concreting further, her unhappy theory as to her cranial discomfort. God she loved big words that meant simple things. All that for "head ache," it should be a sport. She'd totally win, be first place, have a trophy.

Too bad.

However, right now, she was going to try once more to locate, and probably, in all likelihood, save the Boy Wonder.

A girl in a rainbow colored, jagged hemmed skirt and a grey t-shirt ran up to her, the massive hoops on her ears swinging as if with a life force of their own, "Miss Raven, are you o.k., you passed out kind of suddenly, should I call a paramedic, or something. I don't know, are you in pain?" She asked hopefully, as though she was wishing desperately that she could do something, anything, to remedy the tense situation.

Raven almost took pity on her, and then didn't, "Don't think about me, this is my job, go in there and see if anybody was hurt, get all of the people that were there when the robots attacked in a singular location, call that ambulance, and deal with the injured first, then move on to the scared, and then work to get them dismissed. You don't have to do all of that yourself, but get it started. The longer it takes, the longer you are here."

Then she turned and left, leaving the innocent brunette standing in her finery, and wondering what in the hell she should do first. Like I said, almost took pity.

Raven's figuring was that if she could feel Robin's pain from across town, then it was a good probability that she had an at least minimal connection with Robin's mind, probably residual from the invasion of her mind by Robin's subconcious during his incapacitation, oh boy did she love those big words. She loved being intelligent, (oh goody another big word).

So, if that was true, then she might be able to utilize that connection and get a glimpse of where Robin was, maybe even get him to tell her. It was the best possibility she had if the communicator was down, and since she had acknowledged her slight obsessive tendencies, it was far easier to act out the course of action she deemed best, devoid of embarassment.

She made her way to a rooftop that was far away from the excitement, and that was secluded enough to be quiet and peaceful. She levitated, indian style, about two feet above the roof. She closed her two physical eyes, and relaxed her forehead chakra, imagining the lotus blossum opening slowly. She imagined Robin's aura as a dark blue light. She let the lotus emit a white light all its own, mingled with her own magestic purple spirit. She sent the light looking for the blue light, letting it bend and curve around the black field of her vision until she saw the faint glint of a dark blue blur. Immediately, the white/purple light shot straight for the blue and it got clearer, crisper, and larger. The white light pierced the blue light and she felt herself sink into a different set of body parts. Body parts that seemed to ache all over.

Raven opened internal eyes inside the blue light and she knew that these were physical eyes at some other location. In front of her was a gray wall, a plain gray wall, with no adornment. It was stone, grimy, and large, but nonetheless just a gray wall. She tried to lean back to get a better look at her surroundings, and found that she was stopped before she got more than a half a foot back. Apparently she was chained by the wrists facing the wall.

Without the luxury of seeing her surroundings, she took the chance to look at herself. Blue green and yellow. Spandex. Black boots. It all seemed intact. No new wounds. It seemed the ache was completely residual due to previous injuries. This was what the body had felt like before its capture. She did not think that the body had yet met its captor, but indeed had just woken up. The brain was moving hectically. It knew who had brought it here. But it was wondering about Jesus, whoever that was, and it was worried about something. People, purple hair, purple eyes. It was worried about Raven. A strange sensation to be worried about herself in another body.

She tried to establish mental contact. She couldn't help him unless she had all of the information available.

_Robin?_

She felt his sudden shock, and then his understanding.

_Raven?_

_Yes._

_How did you know?_

_I'm not completely sure, I think you were transmitting. _

_Oh._

_Do you know where you are?_

_No, I just woke up and I was unconcious when I was brought here, the leader of the local gang, which we're supposed to be allied with, knocked me out mid-battle._

_Do you have any idea who they were working for. _

_I have a very good idea._

In unison.

_Slade. _

_Yes._

_So are there any clues about where you are?_

_It smells distinctly like a sewer._

_Yeah, that narrows it down. _

_I can't do much better than that, I'm chained to a wall, I don't have eyes in the back of my head, I'm not exactly in optimal viewing conditions. Give me a mo... Hold on. _

_What?_

_Someone just came in. I think I know who it is. _

_Who is it?_

No answer.

Raven sank into the limbs again. She heard heavy foot steps. And a voice, "Dear Robin. How cruel of you to run away and not say goodbye, it is not polite. But your purple friend is not here now, you are all mine."

A hand landed on her back.

It moved down.

A sudden force strong, and dark blue, pushed her up and out of the limbs. The last thing she felt was the rip of spandex and she heard,

_Bye, talk later._

_Robin no, please, let me help._

_Bye Raven. _

And she was gone, forced out of his mind by the damn, proud, self-sacrificing ass-hole that led them.

Raven landed in a sprawl on the concrete roof.

On her butt.

It was not a pleasant awakening.

Immediately, she tried to reestablish a connection, but it was locked tight.

It seemed Robin _could_ close his mind against her, he just chose not to. Interesting, but now was definitely not the time. At least now, she had a general direction to search for the Boy Wonder. Not very narrowed, but nonetheless, narrowed.

She pulled the communicator out again, "Cyborg, do you have Robin's biological signature on file in your memory banks?"

Cyborg's slightly confused face came onto the screen, "Yeah, why?"

Raven continued, now bringing the rest of the remaining unincarcerated team in her conversation, "I want you to spread out in the sewers and search for that signature, Cyborg, if you would transmit it to the other communicators.'

Cyborg looked slightly shocked, but he nodded and turned his head to allow the appropriate functions.

Starfire and Beast Boy responded in the affirmative and their sections on the screen went black. Raven closed the communicator.

She didn't need the signature.

His mind may be closed to her, but she could still "sniff him out", so to speak.

Levitating off of the rooftop, she plummeted straight for the streets, pulling up the nearest manhole cover as she fell. She didn't even pause as she fell straight through the hole and into the dark underbelley of the city. It made sense that the shit of the earth would be in its bowels.

She allowed the manhole cover to stay off, she could use as much light as she could get.

Raven felt a sense of urgency that would not back away. She understood her worry, at last contact, the situation had not appeared to be going anywhere but down. But this imperative need to turn the corner and find the Boy Wonder whole and safe, even if unconcious, on the concrete.

However, she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that such fairytale turns of chance would not happen here, this was not some novel, or some romantic movie where the whole terrible situation would be resolved instantly. Deus ex machina, and the villain suffers a coronary, and Raven's magical mind somehow transports Robin five feet directly in front of her.

Sure, why not. She could imagine her God popping out of his machine and saving her a world of trouble.

Yeah.

Sometimes she would pause and close her eyes, searching for the faint scent of that dark blue aura.

During her search, while she was stopped at a fork, looking for the right path, she felt a sort of trigger in her brain release. As though a thick load of rocks had been removed from a tunnel.

Understanding almost immediately what it meant, she sent her soul self straight through the unblocked tunnel and towards the anticipated blue light.

Almost before the sinking feeling had been established, she opened the eyes, still on the wall, only much, much, much more pain.

_Robin! Robin!_

Her voice was almost tinny in its near desperation. It was as close to hysterics as she had ever gotten. Her brain even forgot for a moment that if she could move him and she could posess him, then he must be alive.

Forgot.

For a whole 8 seconds.

And then two things happened.

1. She remembered.

2. Robin answered.

_Raven? Did you call me?_

Even his mental self was hoarse.

He'd been screaming.

Loud.

_Robin, are you allright?_

_I'm alive, and I probably won't die too soon._

_You have to help me find you, I've got Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy at other points of the sewers looking for you, but it will be easier for me to find you if I can maintain the connection._

_You know what Raven?_

He did not seem to have registered what she was saying, but he wasn't shutting up,and that was o.k.

_What Robin?_

_I do believe that purple is the most lovely color. I would wear purple, but then, I wouldn't be a robin. No. I would be a raven. Hey, just like you. Two ravens. How confusing would that get. _

_Uh huh._

Allright, so he was slightly delirious, not the best of signs, but it would do, as long as he didn't pass out.

_Raven?_

Suddenly the tone was serious. She was walking with her eyes closed, navigating towards the feel of him, phasing in and out of walls almost without her noticing.

_Yes. _

_Do you know what I would really like to do, just once?_

_What?_

She was talking amost subconciously focusing on the light of his aura. She didn't really expect the answer she got.

_I wanna cry._

_Wwhat?_

_I just wanna break down and sob into someone. I know, crazy right, self-respecting heroes don't cry. But hey, I've always been a rebel. _

She was sucked right back into the conversation, and she became very interested.

_Really? How long have you wanted to do this?_

She was expecting a time that started right around the time he'd been forced into the grip of Slade the first time.

_About 9 years. Ever since my mom got shot._

_Reall..._

_Oh yeah, and I lost my eye. Dude, it hurt._

She was really at a loss for words, not only was he sharing more about his past than she had heard in three years, but it seemed that Beast Boy's personality was bleeding into him.

However, she was willing to take advantage of this.

_How did that happen?_

_Well, there was this man, who thought that it was only right that we pay him alot of money. Or that they pay him me. My dad wanted to pay me. My mom didn't. We didn't have the money. My mom defended me. They shot her. Booooom! They took me. _

_Well, I couldn't exactly defend myself as well then as I can now. I was an itty bitty teenie weenies itsy bitsy tiny kid! But afterwards, when he was just lying there I reached over and grabbed a pen from the nightstand, and shoved it into his ribcage. Shinnnnnnnngggg! _

_He got upset and he got a knife from somewhere. It was like magic, I remember that, cause I expected a bunny to come out next. Then POP! my eye was gone. LIke a light or something had flicked off in my head, but only in that side. The brown one's natural, you know that? Huh, smarty pants!_

He was beginning to sound like a five year old. All noises and airplanes and make believe. Only she was terribly sure that this was not the product of a good imagination. She really had not expected this. She knew his parents were dead, but she'd never known why.

_How did your father die?_

_I... Hold on WE'VE GOT A VISITOR! Who could it be. _

She felt the chills run up his spine.

"Robin red breast, flying on the wing, please land here and sing, scream, sing."

The body was positively shuddering now.

"Are we awake now? I hope so."

_No, not him! Raven, make him go away. Please, I'll do anything if you just make him go away, please, I can't take anymore, there aren't any pens, I can't move. And my head hurts so bad, please Raven. If you get rid of him I swear I'll never make you do anything ever again, you or any of the Titans. I'll resign from leader, just don't let him near me. _

His words were running together in their desperation, and Raven could swear that she almost heard tears in his voice, she felt her heart break because she could not do anything. Though she was moving rapidly, it was still slightly slow work to find the origin of the distinct brand of livelihood. She might still be miles away from his underground location.

She returned back to Robin. Apparently, he was so frightened that he didn't have the presence of mind to force her out,and keep her out. In fact, it seemed as though he was pleading for her presence, craving that...friendly human contact.


	13. Once,yesterday,sink shaped coffee makers

The Importance of Secrecy

By: Lunatic with a hero complex

Chapter 13

Metal Parts, you would say, do not make the man. Nor do they exactly get left out of the equation. He would pay a million dollars to have one day back with his original body, but he believed that every bionic part on his frame made up a certain part of his personality.

But at times, he still saw himself as far more human than his leader. Something about Robin made him cold. If he looked at him a certain way for too long, he shivered. And he felt that if he kept looking after that, he might cry. Or one side of his face would. There were no tear ducts in his mechanical eye.

There was something about the petite man with the 6 foot presence that just seemed so wrong, so unfortunate somehow.

Now, as he trudged through the sewers, looking for that coldness, he felt a sense of shame. Shame for the subconcious fear he'd had for so long.

Robin was not a God. He was human. Cyborg's friend. His friend in trouble. He was not here to help him. And that stung. They were capable without him. But they were loose woven, and slower. They were the fragile pieces of an unfinished puzzle. Of all the Titans, he got the distinct feeling that only Raven truly understood the brunt of Robin's humanity, and the only one that balanced that evenly with his immense importance.

Again with the shame.

His left arm beeped, it had picked up something. Something warm in all of the chill.

Not just one warm thing, two. One big, one small. He moved in. It was perhaps half a mile away. A few moments before he reached the origin of the heat signature, another one came onto the screen.

He moved through the final circular archway and into an open space and froze.

His unemotional eye, the mechanical one, immediately identified all three bodies of heat.

Two Titans, and a villain.

Apparently, Raven had taken Slade by surprise and gone Cask of Amontillado on him and dug him a hole in the stone wall, and then closed it up.

It wouldn't last long, he knew that, but it looked like she didn't care.

Robin was shivering under the purple cape.

He was naked.

There were chains on the wall. Broken.

A trail of blood drops from the puddle by the wall to the huddled mass under Raven's cape.

Not emotional, but perfectly logical. It was not a difficult scenario to figure out.

Before he even began to move forward, Raven was upon him, pulling a black bubble out of the air and taking them away from the dank sewers.

* * *

They landed on the doorstep of the Tower. Raven was sitting with Robin encased in the never ending purple. His eyes were wide and panicked, as though he wasn't seeing her.

She turned her head up toward Cyborg reproachfully, "Get Starfire and Beast Boy out of there, I don't want them anywhere near him."

He nodded, flipped his arm open, and spoke, "Starfire, Beast Boy, leave the sewers right now, Slade is loose ,and in your area."

Voices came out, "Certainly."

"K, dude."

The arm closed, and he turned. Raven was going in.

Azar. What had happened? She'd never seen so much blood. She knew that whatever was happening needed to happen away from the eyes of the rest. Robin would prefer it so.

So, she stood up and moved towards the door. The entire time, Robin seemed to be shrinking into himself, peeling off years like a battered costume.

She moved through the entrance hall towards the elevator. She was a little tired.

In the elevator, she considered which room to go into, his or hers.

It was like a cheesy pick-up line, "Hey baby! Your place or mine?"

Slap.

They'd go to his, more of a comfort zone.

The elevator dinged and let them out.

She moved to his door and pushed it open mentally, she couldn't get the code out of him now.

Moving in she paused as the air whooshed behind her when it closed.

The room was much neater than the last time she'd been in there, but she had the feeling that without broken pictures and messed up desks that it was probably one of the neatest places she could ever be.

Every book had a place. Every shelf, every pen, every article of clothing. Everything was military regimented to its area, and it never moved.

It was actually a little more frightening than her room.

So very...very...very unpersonalized. Or maybe it was very personalized, maybe this was who he was. A man who did not believe in chaos, or who had been bred not to believe in it.

In the end, it was really the same thing.

* * *

She hated being in this position. And for some reason, for the second time in two weeks, she was in it. Robin the Boy Wonder was lying prone on his bed with only Raven as his guardian.

Only now, it was far worse.

The all powerful Boy Wonder was naked, save for a blanket scraped from his bed, and he was sobbing in Raven's lap.

On some long repressed maternal instinct, her body rocked back and forth, trying to sooth him. But it appeared it would not be done.

Every muscle in his body was poised in almost orgasmic tenseness. As though waiting for a blow. She couldn't understand how the human body could maintain such a position for so long. But then again, Robin seemed to be the exception to most natural rules.

But, she digressed.

She could ponder over his gravity defying physics after she got him out of statue mode.

"robin." No answer. Chattering teeth.

"robin." A little more forceful, but not directly angry. Still no answer. This would be desperately easier if she knew his real name. But she sensed that information wouldn't be appearing terribly soon.

So, she leaned down, and lifted his chin. His eyes stung her.

There was absolutely nothing there of what had been firmly seated not 12 hours ago.

"robin, I need you to listen to me."

Another small stream of tears leaked from his left eye, and he tried to burrow back into her cloak. She stopped him and he whimpered looking back up at her.

"No, I need you to talk to me, all right?"

A tiny voice responded, "O.k."

"Now, I know you're afraid, and I know you're tired, and I know it hurts , but I need you to try and calm down."

Marginally, she felt his muscles slacken, "That's better, now I need you to put Robin back in front so I can talk to him."

The Boy Wonder's head shook frantically, "No, you don't want to talk to him, he's worse than I am, and he won't stop screaming when he's out. He's been like that since the first time he talked to you down there, and he'll rip his vocal chords out if he screams anymore. Just ask me anything you want 'kay? Leave him out of it."

Raven blinked, she hadn't thought of that, maybe the child robin was a coverup for the breakdown of the true blue bat kid.

"Don't worry, just put him in front, I'll make him stop screaming. Tell him Raven wants to talk to him."

"O.K., but don't say I didn't warn you."

It wasn't something that you could obviously see, but it was a physical change nonetheless. The body in her lap felt taller somehow and the limbs seemed to carry more of a weight of power. But the face was where the true changeover took place. A kind of hectic chaotic terror bled into his eyes and the tears all but disappeared. Then, his back arched, bringing him up in a bow off of her lap and he screamed.

It was the strangest sound that had ever come from him. Full of defeat and helplessness, fear incarnate.

She once again leaned forward, only this time she brought her face next to his ear.

She whispered there.

The audience need not know what she whispered. Some things are better left unsaid. Like private sins and comforting words.

His voice gradually died out and his back lowered, like a draw bridge, until it was correctly curved in the opposite direction.

The terror still lingered, but diluted.

His face looked familiar, rational...ish.

"Robin, can you hear me?"

His eyes, as mix-matched as his personality, strayed to hers and replied, "Yes, Raven."

6 seconds and she felt absurd holding this estranged man. There was suddenly no more of the broken child than there would be if Robin were a flower or toaster.

However, she did not release him.

Robin had proven his acting skills before. Calm waters hold angry fish.

"Do you feel safe enough to sit up now?"

He didn't cock an incredulous eyebrow or huff impatiently, he just conceded and sat up, gathering the blanket closer around him. He pulled himself off of her lap and swung his legs to hang off the side of the bed. He sat there, his head down. He looked so much less...him. Like a shell of his former self, retaining the same shape and coloring, but thinner, like a mirage.

His voice, like a rusty caw from a crow, startled her, "Arthur Drake was the first and only murder I've ever committed. And I do not even see it as a murder, I see it as a kind of euphanasia. He had a wretched life, and he was in vast debt, despite the giving of me. A month after I escaped from the strange house where I lost my eye, I went to our old house. My father only had one consistent habit; every morning at 7:30 A.M., the coffee pot kicked on, Folgers, Chickory Roast.

"I flavored it with drain cleaner. He drank the entire cup before it hurt him."

He paused here, and she saw his head shrink further into the blanket. His shoulders shuddered slightly.

"H-H-His face turned bluish white before he died. I watched from the fire escape outside the kitchen window. Our house was always s-s-s-so small."

He looked at her, firm and resolved, but there were still tear tracks in the dirt on his face.

"I haven't wanted to kill anybody since then. But I want to kill Slade, Raven. I want to drain his blood slowly and painfully so that he knows exactly who killed him. I want to burn his bones."

He used the black comforter to wipe his eyes, "Will you help me kill him, Raven?"

Raven was mollified by the sudden burst of honesty and exhibitionism he had just displayed, but she could understand that kind of hatred, "Yes, I will."

Robin went to stand up and move towards his closet. He moved one step and collapsed onto all fours, the blanket draped over his back like a saddle.

Raven stood to assist him. Robin held a hand up, "No, you know better, Raven, I won't get better if I don't get used to it."

She almost shouted at him, but she bit her lip and fell back into stillness.

It had hit her. He'd been through this before. All alone. The failure to be completely control of your motor functions. The pain. The weakness. He'd done it by himself and had made it look like nothing was wrong.

He moved to his knees. He sat for a moment.

Then, to his feet. He stood still. He slowly walked towards the closet, wincing at every rub of his thighs together.

Raven tried her very best to ignore the blood spots on the short carpet.

He reached the closet. Pushed the button. Pulled out those same sleep pants that Cyborg had given him and closed the door. He moved to his drawers and picked out a pair of plain white boxers. He leaned his dark head against the wall, keeping the blanket over his shoulders between Raven's eyes and himself, and pulled the boxers up over his legs. He let the blanket drop and repeated the process with the pants. He finally turned back to her, "Raven, you have no idea what it meant to be chained against a wall, crying, angry, ashamed, ...petrified, and to hear, like a holy apparition, your voice. You hadn't forgotten me. I was out of it, but, part of me was still there."

He limped over to the bed, picking up the comforter as he went. He sat down.

"I am so tired, Raven. I could sleep forever."

He turned to lie down.

Raven stood to leave.

His hand stopped her, he looked at the bed while he spoke, as though embarassed, "Would you, I mean, could you, uh stay here for awhile. I mean just long enough for me to fall asleep."

He didn't look at her. She just unclasped her cloak and threw it by the bed. He scooted over on to the other side of the bed, and she got in beside him. He turned, his back to her, probably a purely male attempt to save face. She used it to her advantage and threw a protective arm over him. At first, he stiffened, but then relaxed. Soon, she heard the even tones of sleep. She listened to him breathe, alive, secure, slightly broken.

* * *

A trail of bricks about 3 feet long. Crumbled, whole, take your pick, they lay disheveled on the ground of the sewers. And 20 feet from this interesting trail, was a man. Well, at least it was very close to a man in appearance. Inside, he had been far from a simple man for many years. Now, he was just a human shaped shell with the bitter concentration of hate and obsession poured in. Contrary to what he was sure the Titans believed. He did not have the scientists from Arbor Heights. Who would he want to clone,Robin? No, chasing the original was so much more fulfilling. He would like to know whohad done thedirty deedthough. That was an interesting acquisition. But, he had far more complex plans for the city and Robin.

No, copies wouldn't do at all.


	14. Martha Stewart flies against mutiny

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter 14

Lunatic with a Hero Complex

Raven, for lack of a more elaborate term, felt warm. Far past the usual uneven warmth that her purple comforter distributed.

She felt a kind of firm warmth, the feeling that comes when you're locked in a solid sleep and its just too strong to fight. She blinked slightly, caught sight of a black head of hair, smiled, and went back to sleep.

What seemed like moments later, she awoke to lack of warmth. For a moment, she lie there, her head on her arm, staring groggily at the black pillow. The man used nothing but black cloth. Then, by natural association, she turned her head slightly to locate the missing head of black hair.

He was at his desk, back curved, head bowed, writing arm moving furiously from side to side. Should she have expected any less?

He was the saviour of a race. The race of teenage super heroes, or some poetic crap like that. It was early, she was still slightly asleep, her life analyzations weren't all that astute at the moment. She lifted her head up off of her arm and bent it to use as support. It was a little asleep, but it held.

She sat up in the dark bed and let the blanket fall off of her unitard. Wrapping her arms around her raised knees, she knew it wouldn't take him long. And she was right. "Good Morning, Raven."

A slight grin.

"Good Morning Vietnam."

He turned, smiling, "Ohhhhh, you closet Williams buff you, sleep well?"

A split second question-answer session in her mind, jumbled but organized.

_so lively-distant, close-intimate, friendly, how, what, problem, dreams?_

All in her head.

In her mouth...

"Yes, very well, you?"

The smile grew.

_how's that possible_

"Great!"

_A shadow, what, dreams?_

"but hard."

"Oh."

"Hungry?"

Yes, she was, "Yeah."

"It's early, let's hit the kitchen."

He stood, wincing slightly, and moved to grab a shirt. though he was in pain, somehow, the muscles of his back seemed to move lazily under the skin, waiting for action. She swung her legs out of the bed, picked up her cloak and turned to follow him.

He smiled at her, "They're not here, don't worry."

She dropped the cloak, "Oh."

They left the room.

She didn't bother to ask how he knew they weren't here, he just knew.

In the elevator, he sat, lazily, and rather childishly, on the support bar around the walls.

Designed to steady hands, not asses.

Lord knows he was light enough to do it.

_If_, she thought to herself_, this is what he is like without the costume, I think I might burn it._

It dinged on the right floor and he hopped down. He walked to the fridge, humming, and pulled out a carton of eggs, and a pound of bacon, he turned, "Chicks and pigs allright with you?"

She felt a little strange about the way he asked the question, but she nodded her assent, and he nodded back, "All right, sit at the bar, and I'll cook."

She nodded again, mutely, and sat down.

He pulled out a glass bowl and began breaking eggs into it.

Without Robin, she wasn't sure that Titan's Tower would have any cookware at all.

Cyborg liked to cook, but he was as absent minded as Beast Boy and probably would have served them on papre plates with plastic forks.

Robin leaned to the right, lifting his left leg, and took cheese out of the fridge. Whistling, he leaned back up and began tearing it up in the eggs.

Watching the eggs cook up into a fluffy yellow mass, Raven rested her head in her hands, settling to watch him alternate between the bacon and egg skillets.

"I'm sorry Cyborg was there."

Robin began to seperate the eggs onto plates along with the bacon, he didn't turn around, "I'm not."

Her head remained in her hands and an eyebrow cocked at him, "Really?"

Robin set her plate in front of her and smiled, a truly amused smile, "Yes, really."

She picked up the fork, "Oh."

_10:00 P.M. The Previous Night_

Utter silence.

Barely even the noise of breathing.

Eyes on feet.

A sudden explosion of noise, Beast Boy, "Dude, I am just so tired of this secrecy. Raven and Robin are hiding something from us and I am totally done on the whole secrecy thing!"

He finished, panting slightly, looking around.

Cyborg felt a strange boiling sensation.

He thought of that spattered trail of blood.

He thought of the chains.

He thought of the nude form under Raven's cape.

Another explosion of noise, angry.

"Did you ever think that the secrets were secret for a good reason? It may have nothing to do with us. Just because he's shown us his eyes does not mean that all of his personal affairs become public fodder! Just be content that he is doing what is best for the situation. Its not hurting us!"

The sudden silence echoed.

Beast Boy looked stricken. Starfire seemed slightly shell shocked. But also slightly guilty. But of course, even the innocent felt remorse.

Cyborg wiped a metal hand over his flesh forehead, "I'm sorry B.B., I'm just tired, let's get some sleep."

Everyone nodded quietly and they grouped off towards the elevator.

When they were gone, a shape formed out of the shadows and Robin came into fruition. Looking calmly in the direction the remainder of his team had gone, he smiled slightly. He turned and limped towards the fridge. He got a glass of water. He took the elevator to his floor. He set the glass down and climbed into bed next to the purple and black body. He slept.

Robin took a hardy bite off of the strip of bacon in his hand. He chewed thoughtfully. Raven took a bite of egg. She looked at Robin. Robin looked at her.

He grinned, "I really love bacon."


	15. Clap your hands if ya need to hibernate

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter 15

By: Lunatic with a Hero Complex

Once, as she had first been assimilating herself to the dimension, she had read a vastly interesting book. Written by a man named J.M. Barrie. Peter Pan, the story of a little boy who would never grow up and a little girl who, though hardy in belief, could never stay young.

This boy, this epitome of childlike carelessness, held some care still. Forgetful, tempered like the wind, he knew utmost love for one human creature. His Wendy.

Yes, Raven had found this interesting. And yet, despite his disposal to fitful lapses of selfishness, every female personage within a one mile radius of this boy cradled his image close to their heart. And most men, just wanted him to die. Usually painfully.

Of course, all of the characteristics were not paralells. Robin did not forget what needed to be remembered, and he rarely thought only of himself. But, there were quite a few congruencies.

In a way he would never be able to grow out of his boyhood costume, it would stay plastered to his forehead for the rest of his natural life. It was the consequence of growing up under such, uh, notorious tutelage. The man that he was made no difference to anyone but those that knew him. Every female heart in Jump City, younger or older, felt an innate sense of motherly love, subconcious maybe, but there. Raven should know, she was a suffering victim of that symptom at the present moment. The moment you looked at him too long, you wanted to protect him. He was a skinny boy protecting a city, it was ridiculous.

Moving on.

However much she did not want them to, the other Titans did eventually return. An almost sixth sense had gotten Robin out of the kitchen and back to his room, Raven in tow, and back into his costume before they came strolling into the building.

He'd been sitting there, sipping coffee, two sugars, and cream, and then his head had tilted, and he'd grabbed her hand, putting the coffee mugs in the dishwasher, and dragged her up to his room.

She hadn't even realized why until she felt their presences echoing once more in the awareness of her perception.

She may be empathic, and psychic, but she truly doubted she would ever have the knack for timing escape that Robin had developed.

Once they were fully decked out in their costume of trade, Robin had given her one last hardy grin, and opened his door, moving for the living room.

She'd followed him, waiting for a few moments to come down in the elevator after he had.

When the door dinged open and she'd looked out, the site that greeted her had been shocking, not for a bad reason, but because it was oddly sedate. Beast Boy, of all people, was reading, and Cyborg typing madly into a computer. Starfire seemed to be examining the movie collection, and Robin was stretched out on the couch.

Now, that was what really caught her as odd.

He'd gotten dressed up to… nap.

His head was on the arm of the couch, and he looked up when she entered. For a moment the white ovals just stared at her, and then he crunched his legs towards his body to leave her a space to sit.

What had he slipped into that breakfast that he was this loose? He seemed to be almost uninhibited, save the costume.

She looked closer at Beast Boy's choice of reading material, and was confused at the subject, **"Sigmund Freud, and the subconscious." **A strange choice to be sure, but if he wanted to, then more power to his green self.

She moved to the couch, and sat in the space freed by Robin's legs.

Then wonders of all wonders, Robin stretched his legs out over her lap.

Was he humming?

A Disney song?

She was a little worried.

"Hey Rae?"

Rae, he never called her Rae, it was Raven. Always Raven, leaders did not use nicknames, full name contact, dead on spot, I am a true diplomat.

"Yeah?"

"If you could be an animal, what would you be?"

"What?

He looked up at her, his face exasperated, "If you could be an animal, what would you be? Its not that hard."

She was very worried now, but she answered, "I think that I would be a bear."

Robin snorted, very uncharacteristically, "A bear? That was unexpected, why?

Raven leaned her head back against the couch, "It would be nice to live for a few months in the forest, my chief concern feeding myself, and whatever family I have, and never having to worry about predators, and then for all of the cold months, I could sleep. It would be a very uncomplicated existence. What about you?"

Robin leaned back against the arm of the couch bringing his arms up to fold behind his head, "I would be…an alley cat. Able to fade into the background whenever I needed to, unconcerned about anything except the next meal, and that mouse in the street. I think that, would be an extremely uncomplicated existence in itself."

Raven leaned forward and put a hand against his forehead, and she was a little surprised at the warmth that met her.

She closed her eyes and sent her soul self into his mind, looking for anything out of place. For a moment there was nothing but the usual scenery, computers, caves, and courage, and then she saw something new. There was a massive hole in the groundwork of his landscape. Dug up, pit like, and the dirt was all piled up next to it. It appeared to be graveyard earth that was laying unceremoniously next to the hole, judging from the headstones that littered the incongruently dark horizon.

Raven inched her metaphysical self closer to the pit. As though she were really there and she expected a werewolf to pop out unexpectedly and rip her to shreds.

When she was within leaning distance of the rectangular hole, she submitted to the feeling of being in a physical entity and peeked, cautiously into the hole.

There were no bones in the dirt, but it was not empty.

A coffee mug, a pen, golden and twinkling in the fading sun. A…a…stick of wood, rounded, with strings coming out of the ends. Strange things for a graveyard's hallowed home. And they were placed with a sacred resonance, as though they were not just everyday items. Raven was crouching to go down into the sunken alter, when she was cast backwards, or outwards, as the case may be. Suddenly, she was sitting on the couch again, with Robin's legs still thrown over her lap, but they were tense. And he was tense. And his mask was anything but forgiving. He was not pleased.

He did not say anything out loud, but she could read the newly born fear and mistrust in the set of his body.

He sat up and swung his legs out to the ground, "I think I'm gonna go catch some fresh air."

He stood and went towards the stairs to do just that.

Raven felt shame slightly heat her cheeks and she was faintly aware of the thin crack that appeared in a mug in the kitchen.

But there was a larger problem. Robin was not at all completely healed, and though he seemed highly capable of hiding it, his body was not so well versed in deception.

He seemed to have a fever, a high one, and it was affecting his personality. In fact, the only times he'd really seemed like himself this morning were the study note session before she was awake, and the cold withdrawal approximately thirty seconds previous.

She had to deal with this. And it would probably not be dealt with delicately.

Withdrawing as unobtrusively as she felt it was possible; she headed towards the stairs, and towards the roof, which of course was his only real option when he had headed in this direction.

Raven's thoughts as she ascended were, "Of course he had an infection, she had given herself fully over to the emotional needs and forgotten completely about the physical aspect of his distress.

On the roof, he was pacing back and forth, restlessly, as though there were a problem or a villain that he simply could not figure out. When the door clanged shut behind her, his head jerked up, a bird interrupted, and he was suddenly moving towards her, his chest heaving.

"Why would you do that? Why would you just look in without asking? I would have let you, you had no right to invade, what did you think you were doing?"

He seemed to be running out of breath. As though shouting at her or scolding her were actually a sport event.

"What did you need to see anyway? Its not as though I was acting in pain or danger! Just ask first! Just as…"

His words faded out and his eyes looked up, as though caught by the sight of a plane, and then he toppled, like the topless towers of Iliad, and he hit the roof.

Raven was struck by the suddenness of it and she didn't move for a moment. And then she was on the way towards him.

Oddly, this was easier. Her plan had been that if he would not let her try and treat him, she would knock him out, probably mentally, and drag him silently down to the infirmary.

Now, she only need worry about the last part.

Quite convenient, but not a pretty sign for bird boy's health.

She really was getting quite tired of the nursemaid role. It quickly lost its charm and turned her bitter.

The only way this boy ever seemed able to communicate was in pain, or screams. It never failed that any attempt at a normal relationship ended in one of the former.

It was actually incredibly frustrating.

But she bore it.

Because there was an incredibly strange thing happening in this damned T.

She cared what happened. She was terribly alarmed that something might go terribly wrong, and that some of them would be terribly changed or lost.

It was a valid fear. Because it could happen, in fact had happened. And she didn't want it to happen again.

She levitated him back down to the infirmary, taking some back ways to provide privacy.

In the infirmary, the first thing she did was douse the hell out of him with cold water.

He sputtered awake, spitting and sitting straight up. His mouth was wide open, water rivulets coursing over the open cavity.

Before he had a chance to complain, she spoke, "First of all, you need to calm down, and second of all, you need to listen to me."

He let the water run its course for a moment, and then he seemed to regain a semblance of himself. He closed his mouth and moved the eyemask off, it was probably a little wet.

He nodded at her and spoke, "Go ahead."

"You have an infection, I'm almost sure of it, we didn't treat your injuries. It could be very damaging, so after I run the necessary tests, I'm going to probably start you on Keflex."

He hadn't stopped her yet, so she assumed, he probably felt the truth of what she was saying, could probably already feel the heat that his blood was unnaturally coursing with. The pounding in his head, the strange, bright, razor quality of everything around him.

He wasn't stupid, just foolishly brave sometimes. He would not refuse to keep himself alive, not if it was for the good of the Titans. He was just that way…it was more of a hindrance sometimes than a help, but in this case, it was exactly what she needed.

Slowly, he nodded, agreeing with her in a fashion. It seemed as though his brain wouldn't keep up with the speed he wanted it to, "All right, but if you please, do not tell the others."

She nodded.

A pause.

"How long does this treatment take?"

She felt a mental muscle release that she didn't know she'd been holding, "It depends, it varies from case to case, but probably around one or two weeks, maybe three to be safe."

Again, a nod.

"All right."

She took a sample of blood, and immediately sent him up to his room to rest.

There was a tension now, between them. Not necessarily bad tension, but a tension borne of in between intimacy. They had come very close to passing a point, but they had slowed down, and now…they were attempting to pass that point at a reasonable pace, and though wise, it was slightly awkward.

And, she supposed, wonderful.

That, unknowing suspense, the need to know how it ends.

And over it all, was that lovely incident in the gym.

Oh how she desired a repeat performance….

Stop. Right. There.

Tests.

Right.

She put the blood sample under the microscope, and adjusted the focus knob….she squinted at it for a moment, and her suspicions were confirmed, infection.

She grabbed a bottle of Keflex and moved for the door, she guessed she was making a delivery.

* * *

The door was closed, well of course it was closed, a guy like him never slept with his door open.

So she eased it open, and walked in, it was dark, but still kind of a lighter dark, because the sunlight was making a dashing escape through the cracks between the heavy curtains.

She almost snorted in amusement, Robin, shirtless and asleep, was slightly sprawled on his mattress, right arm appearing to be reaching for the window, left arm in a frozen "Ole!" moment.

She intended to just put the bottle and a note of instructions on his bedside table, so she filched a piece of paper and a pencil off of his desk and jotted down the instructions, "Twice a day, daily, two to three weeks."

She set the paper on the table and pinned it down with the bottle. As she was retracting her hand and leaning up, an arm, lightning quick and strong, grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her in a shoulder roll onto the bed.

Before she knew it, she was pinned underneath the arm of a shirtless Robin, and he was…cuddling?

Yes, she believed he was. He'd rolled her under his arm and was using her like an impromptu teddy bear while he pulled the covers over them and put his nose in the space between her collarbone and her chin. She rolled her eyes, and she was disturbed to find that it felt like an…affectionate…eye roll.

"My, Robin, this is a mature turn of affairs, I'm so glad you were able to keep your wits about you in the face of illness."

Robin didn't relinquish his grip, he just rolled his mouth out enough so that it could be heard and replied in a groggy, gravelly tone, that Raven was afraid was not at all displeasing to her ears, in fact, it made her very…uhm…happy.

"I'm sick Raven, you shouldn't insult me and I get special treatment, I want to use you as a teddy bear…and being sick, I am perfectly allowed to do such."

And then his mouth disappeared into her collarbone again.

Another disturbingly affectionate eye roll, "Fine, just a little while, they will start thinking we're the same person if we keep disappearing at the same times."

With that she rolled over towards him a little bit and made herself comfortable. She had the premonitory feeling that she was going to be here a little longer than a while.

* * *

She woke, not because she realized she'd been asleep, but because something about the bed was different.

She felt different.

It took her a moment to realize that she wasn't under Robin's arm any more, and then she automatically rolled to look for him.

He was tangled in the sheets on the other side of the bed, and he looked to be sweating profusely. She rolled closer and she could see the fine wrinkle in the dead center of his forehead, that came when his eyebrows crinkled in confusion or pain.

He was breathing hard, and when she tried to shake him awake, she only got a faint bastardized mumble.

Of course! The Keflex, she'd brought it in, but they'd been rather sidetracked, and he'd never gotten around to taking it.

She untangled Robin's legs from the sheets and smoothed his damp hair back from his forehead. He still didn't respond, except to attempt weakly to follow her hand when it left.

"Hold on, I'll be right back."

She left the bed and went to the bathroom. She filled up a glass with tap water, and went back to the bed. She shook one of the pills out of its cotton topped container and rejoined the bird boy on the bed.

He was shaking now, and she was starting to get worried. So she lifted his head, holding it in her lap, and she used her other hand to gently pat his face, "Robin, Robin," a little firmer, "Robin."

His eyes shuttered open, and stared up at her in confusion for a moment, as though of unsure of who she was, or even who he was. She continued anyway.

"I need you to swallow this pill, do you understand?"

Again that moment of confusion, but she could see the discipline in him pushing coherency into his eyes, and after a small bout of silence, he nodded, adding an extremely fragmented, "Okay."

She picked the pill up off of the nightstand and put it in his mouth, and then lifted the glass of water to his lips tilting it slightly, "Now drink…"

And he did.

She almost forgot that the results were not instantaneous. When he didn't immediately show signs of improvement, she almost panicked.

But then she remembered the two week long med course and felt better. So instead of panicking, she went to the bathroom and got a wet rag.

She was laying it on his forehead when it happened.

The alarm sounded.


	16. If Toto says its true, I must be crazy

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter 16

Lunatic With a Hero Complex

This timing could not be any more inconvenient. Well, not true, there is always a way for a situation to be worse, but it was pretty damn out of whack. She glanced down at Robin's forehead, shining and pale...he was most definitely out of commission. The gang would not be pleased, but they would accept it. Raven was pretty sure that they would not be directing very many suspicious glares or questioning glances in Robin's direction.

She gently moved Robin's head out of her lap and set it back down on the black pillow. She leaned down to speak to him, "Robin, I have to go, the alarm is sounding, I will be back as soon as I can, but you have to rest for me." She lifted her head to get off the bed, and again was unprepared when Robin's hand shot out and snagged her neck, bringing her ear down to his mouth level.

"Just be careful...don't be brave."

She smiled ruefully, he was definitely ill, his advice never leaned against the brave, it just leaned towards saving lives. If one of his team got into danger, then he swooped in, saved the day, set them back down, and then they had to be brave again. She leaned back up, and she pushed some hair out of his eyes, "Don't worry Robin, you know me, all mind, no physical."

She kissed his forehead and then headed for the door.

She made it down to the living room just as the other Titans were pulling up the disturbance information. On Rose St. Vincent Street there were signs of a massive disturbance, such as explosions, pedestrian damage, and property damage. The damage pattern seemed to suggest a large force, as in the force of something large in size, and the use of demolitions.

Raven cringed, of all the times not to have your team leader. Couldn't it have been petty robbery...or a kitty up a tree...or even just a hostage situation. Any of those scenarios would be easier to handle without a leader than a massive foe with chemical explosive assistance in the middle of Goddamn Rose St. Vincent Street!

Well, there was no hope for it now. She stepped up to the console, thought for a moment and turned to her teammates. "Starfire, I need recon, you and Beast Boy fly over the incident and tell me who we are dealing with, Cinderblock, Plasmus, I need to know. Don't be gung ho, we're missing a person, no need to be foolish. Cyborg, you and I are going in the T-Car. When we know who we're fighting, we'll plan more fully."

As the other four Titans sprang into action, Raven was astonished at the ease with which she stepped into the head role, and at the speed with which the other Titans followed her orders. She supposed she really had been spending quite a lot of time around Robin. She was even beginning to take on a few of his mannerisms. She wouldn't be surprised if he suddenly became quiet and devastatingly moody. Not that it would be much of a change of personality.

Cyborg was waiting on her, "Come on cutie, let's roll"

She smiled-her!-and followed him to the elevator. On the ride down, her smile flickered to a frown momentarily as she thought of the very sick man lying in his bed. But she forced those worries to the back of her mind, and put her mind wholly in keeping her head during the situation, apparently she was to take point in this mission, and she would hate to fail anyone.

It would be a terrible disappointment to Robin that on the day he finally decides to sit back and actually let his injuries heal, a member of his team dies or worse yet, the foe that gets away destroys human life in any form.

Raven wouldn't fail him. She couldn't. She didn't think she could take the sadness, the heartbreak, and the annoying and renewed determination that she knew would reflect in his gaze if this mission went badly.

Rose St. Vincent was not terribly far away from the Tower, as streets went, it was approximately five miles from the crossing. As Cyborg and Raven started across the bridge, the silence was already starting to become uncomfortable. Cyborg broke it first. "So I didn't see you or Robin for quite a while this afternoon." He didn't make it a question, it was just a statement, she figured it was for her benefit, so as not to make her defensive or grumpy.

She didn't have anything to hide, and for one sparkling shiny chance in her life, it was perfectly okay to tell someone the truth, "His infection had a relapse this afternoon, and his fever spiked, he was barely conscious when I left him to see why the alarm had sounded."

Cyborg's human eye grew exponentially with every centimeter the red orb of his cybernetic eye dilated, "Why didn't you tell us, we have to do something, infections are serious."

Raven could sense a very uncharacteristic panic coming on, so she cut into the middle of his steadily escalating rant, "A fact which I very well know, which is why I started him on Penicillin this afternoon. He had his first dose, and I'll keep him on it for two weeks, and we'll smite the infection of darkness and doom right out of his system, but right now we have to deal with the monsters of the real live material kind, so please focus your mind."

Cyborg shook himself out of it, and smiled at Raven, "Thanks Rae, I needed that, well if you're confident he's going to be fine, then so am I."

At that moment, Raven's communicator cheeped and she flipped it open, "Yes?"

Starfire's face appeared in the screen, "Raven, it is most assuredly not Cinderblock, nor is it Plasmius."

"Well then who is it, Star?"

"It appears to be…well…gone."

"Gone?"

"Yes, it is nowhere for me to be able to see it. I was able to hear the terrible sound of its rampage from just around the corner, and when I rounded the edge of the Baltrix Building, there was nothing there, just the damage and a few shocked however unharmed pedestrians. Though there does not seem to be any real danger, I would most appreciate your presence Raven, if you would please make haste."

"We'll be there real soon Starfire, just hold, don't do anything."

"Most certainly."

"Same goes for you Beastboy."

"Yeah, whatever Rae, just get here, this place gives me the willies."

The T-Car rounded the corner of 56th onto Rose St. Vincent, and Raven found herself shocked, despite the fact that she had been warned. There were massive dents in the taller buildings of the avenue, as though they were made of clay and some wayward child had taken the fancy to send a hammer through their corners, and the street looked like broken pie crust.

Everywhere there were dusty faced pedestrians with a perpetual look of mental whiplash, scared, dirty, drained, and no idea why. It was a look that the Titan's got to see often, but they never got used to it. It was the look of victims that were given no itinerary pamphlet, and no warning. Cyborg drove through the rubble slowly, avoiding injuring anyone. "I don't think I'll ever be completely comfortable with our job, Rae."

Raven felt the rare passage of a moment of complete understanding flow through the AC system of the T-Car, "God Cyborg, I hope not."

They pulled the car over by one of the few remaining light posts and got out, Starfire landed and Beast Boy did the same, feathers shrinking into his arms and talons subdividing and lengthening into green fingers, "Nobody seems to know what happened, nobody saw anything one minute and then it was Godzilla strikes Tokyo all over."

"Anyone know what it looked like?" Raven.

"They only can agree that it was large," said Starfire, "beyond that, some of the victims say it was of a purple color, others protest that it was indeed green. Many insist that it was scaly, and yet more disagree and say that it was furred. Do you see my difficulty in finding an account?"

"Yes," Raven said, "I think I understand perfectly."

She was worried, the fact that they were missing a member was becoming more and more of a problem. There was no doubt that something had destroyed this street, however, nobody that was there seemed to have a clear idea of what the attacker had looked like. Robin would know what to do, but Robin was lying in a bed in a dark room having fever dreams and trying to get over there last encounter with big bad evil darkness.

"Alright, I want emergency services here, now, and I want us to get the more dangerous debris cleaned up, things that are about to fall, or that have already fallen. When we are sure that everyone is taken care of, I want to form two separate search teams. Cyborg and Beast Boy in one, and Starfire and me in the other. We will find this thing, if it's as huge as the people say it is, it can't hide for too long."

The Titans stared at her for a second. She grew internally nervous, but stayed placid on the outside, "Yes?" She made it sound slightly dangerous.

Cyborg just grinned, it was small, but it made her calmer, "You really have been spending waayy too much time around Bird Boy."

The fact that he was voicing what she had already been thinking made her smile again (twice in one day, it was nerve-wracking), "I know. But someone has to do it, and unless one of you wants the job, I guess it's up to me."

Beast Boy held up his hands, "Hey better you than me Rae, you're head is way better built for the strategy game than mine is." There was laughter, the oh so special breed of mirth that can flourish in the middle of a rubble strewn street while dusty faced citizens sit calmly going insane waiting on their saviors.

Raven became once more serious, "Alright Titans…well…Go."

She stopped herself from making a shooing gesture just in time. It would have been a disturbing sight if she hadn't. Raven…shooing…saints preserve their souls.

Starfire flew to the Playdough masterpieces that were the architecture of Rose St. Vincent, and began bending the wayward steel girders back into place. Beast Boy retained his elfish form and went to begin calming pedestrians with his childish grin and easy humor while the emergency services were still on their way and Raven began removing the stone clods that littered the destroyed street. Cyborg was moving cars from their wayward positions, shifting a Beetle from the top of a water hydrant to the sidewalk and then taking a Mazda from atop a Camry and moving them out of the way.

It was teamwork, something that, even without a team leader, they had learned to do. It was their easiest task to achieve and for that, Raven was both grateful, and proud. It was one thing to be a team when you had someone constantly reminding you to be, it was something completely different to be a team when all you had was instinct. When they were sure that there were, albeit miraculously, no casualties, and very few injured, they left the ambulance and Red Cross to handle the dusty masses and went in search of their villain.

It was decided that Starfire and Raven would take the above ground locations, and Beast Boy and Cyborg would handle the underground domain, though the chances of something as large as this beast or villain was supposed to be getting underground without leaving a pretty damn big hole were extremely slim.

* * *

Raven had plenty of faith in the Titans; she felt it would be disrespectful and cruel to have anything less than complete faith. But there was a difference between having no faith and worrying. What she was doing right now, she was worrying, not being faithless, and it was about to drive her crazy. Was this what Robin felt all the time? Did he constantly feel responsible for four other lives? No wonder the Boy Wonder constantly fell prey to psychoses that baffled even the Freudian geniuses of the world. Starfire was floating to her right with her glowing fists thrust before her to give them a better view in the growing dusk of what was ahead of them. So far the search had been a bust, no signs of massive fleeage, no busted manholes, no destroyed alley ways, and no shaken people that had witnessed a massive object running past them, not even a squashed petunia to go on. It was, to say the least, frustrating.

And it was pissing her off.

And to top off that list of current PMS focus factors, she was worried about Robin. They had been gone now for three hours and she wanted to be sure that he was still okay. She had a problem; a newly acquired addiction if you will, and she was sure in her own mind to blame that "Damn Secretive Bird Boy."

She was shaken from her mental angsty musings when Starfire stopped abruptly to her right. "Oh."

"What?" She moved up next to the alien and gazed dazedly on the sight that greeted her.

In the middle of one of the danker and darker alleys of Jump City, growing as if there were no natural law that permitted it, and as if it were completely normal….a massive field of Poppies. Not a small patch striving feebly against the pollution and lack and sunshine, but a full blown, color riot, "Off to see the Wizard" FIELD of Poppies.

Raven cautiously moved past Starfire, approaching the flora. She felt the need to touch it, to run her hands through the silky smooth texture of petals and feel the flowers spring back to position once her hand had passed them, it was an urge, and it was almost painful that she wasn't yet. She took halting steps forward, shuffling, jerking. Her hands reached out, anticipating the sheer greatness she was about to experience, and her arm was pulled back, almost painfully. Just like that, the spell was gone. The Poppies looked perfectly normal, pretty, yes, but normal.

She looked down at her arm, which was still in someone's grip and saw a hand, which led to a wrist, which in turn led to an arm, which led to a spandexed shoulder, which was next to a neck, which was supporting a head….that was wearing a mask. A skull mask.

Raven gasped in surprise and raised an angry bout of black energy to repel her attacker against the opposite alley wall. She was raising her hand to ward off his next assault when she realized that there was no next assault, he was simply standing there with his hands palm out and held up, "Whoah there bird, just here to chat, no nefarious plots. Ease up."

She didn't put her hands down, but she did pull back the soul extension she'd put out, her eyes stayed slitted and she faintly registered Starfire next to her with her hands green hot and ready to let loose.

"So chat."

The incident with the poppies had left her mind a little muddled and she wasn't much in the mood for witty banter.

She couldn't see it, but she just knew that Red X was smirking behind that damn mask. He leaned back up from the wall, and walked slowly towards the pair of girls, "I know that we really aren't the best of buddies, but I believe that something strange is going on around here, and it's really been interfering with my work days."

Raven let her hands fall, Red X was into petty theft and small time high jinx, he was not into the heavy minded plots to sweetly work his way into the good graces of the Teen Titans and then rip them apart from the inside while he watched giggling madly to his equally insane lackies.

What...she'd had a hard few months.

"What makes you say something strange is going on, there's always something evil in this city, sometimes, its even you."

"No, no sweetheart, strange. All the petty villains, the little mosquitoes that you and your gang of super friends take care of in between snack times, seem to be disappearing. The unfortunate homeless of our blind and fair city are disappearing. One day the little bastards are there, stealing candy from babies and plotting the demise of all the righteous, and good, and the people that turned them down at prom, and then, they're gone, poof, never seen again."

Raven was now interested, this was something that none of them had heard about. Understandable, they didn't hear about villains until they did something, well, villainous. It was strange. And the homeless? It was impossible to keep track of them, their numbers were constantly changing. But if they too were disappearing, then something strange was going on indeed. It was highly unlikely that the males and females of the Homeless and Petty Villain breed had mated off and moved to some unpopulated location to make dirty and angry babies.

"And the Poppies, anything you've heard about them?"

His mask tossed a quick glance at the patiently waving field and turned back to her, "Nothing I've heard, just things I've seen. A person wades off into those, and then they don't come back. Only by the luck of a stray cat that I'm not there myself."

Starfire had not lowered her hands, they were slightly less bright, but Raven could tell that she still wasn't going to completely trust him. Raven tried to think her way through all of the information. If the poppy field could dispose of people without anyone knowing how, it might be able to dispose of a very large attacker. They probably weren't going to find anything. Meanwhile, an important clue to the recent weirdness of Jump City had literally just grabbed her, and she figured it would be best to return to somewhere safe and sort it all out. And get Robin's input on the situation.

She would bring Red X back to the tower, let Robin hear everything he had to say, try to piece together all of the seemingly random bits of information they had obtained over the past few days and hope for something to form. It wasn't as if Red X didn't already know how to get in the tower.

"Alright, we're going to go back to the tower, all of us. And we're going to figure out what we all know. And then we will discuss what to do."

Starfire seemed bothered, "But Raven, the Red X is most untrustworthy, and I don't think it would be safe to bring him to the tower."

Raven felt her head begin to hurt, "I know Starfire, but he's the only clue we have, and I don't think that he has plans for city wide domination in mind."

Once again she felt his smirk through the calm material of his disguise, but she ignored it, "Follow me." He saluted cockily, "Yes Ma'am!"

She opened her communicator once in the air, "Cyborg, Beast Boy, head back to the tower, we've got new information to discuss." She flipped it closed again before they had time to protest or ask questions and sped up a little so that she could get to the tower in time to get Robin downstairs. He needed to be there to hear it, and she didn't think it would be right to bring everyone into his room.

* * *

The moment she reached the tower, she knew she was ahead of Red X and ahead of Starfire, who probably wasn't putting more than fifty feet between herself and the criminal.

She went to Robin's room and opened the door turning towards the bed. Where Robin wasn't. He was however sitting at his desk in full costume, once again writing away furiously. "Hello Raven." She wasn't shocked.

She walked to the desk; she would have been miffed that he wasn't resting if she wasn't here to get him out of bed herself, "I thought I told you to stay in bed."

"Well you know how I am about following other people's orders," he turned his head up to her and smiled briefly. She could still see the sheen of fever on both his eyes and his forehead, but she knew she would turn him away from whatever he felt he needed to do. "How did the mission go, was the attacker contained?"

"He wasn't there, no one was injured though, just lots of damage. None of the pedestrians were quite sure what he looked like, there were conflicting descriptions, they just all agreed he was large."

"Helpful, did you search for it?"

"We made sure the citizens were safe first, and then we split into two search parties. However, we found no trail. But we did stumble upon some new information, and a field of Poppies." She new the prospect of a new clue would rouse him out of whatever feverish (mentally not physically) thesis he was writing.

She was not disappointed.

His head lifted again and he looked at her, with his uncovered eyes, "New information, what kind?" Then his eyes squinted, "Poppies?"

She almost laughed, "Yes, Poppies, but the new information came in the form of a person, a person that we really don't like most of the time."

"Who?"

"Red X."

He didn't speak. But she saw the rage building in his face, the tear between his desire to be informed of everything and his hatred for the identity stealing comedian like a line between his two different colored eyes.

She spoke again, "Star's bringing him back here, because I wanted us all together somewhere that I knew was secure and I feel that you need to hear what he knows, and that he knows what we need to."

The rage split, and his face peeled away again to that calm that she hated. The nothingness that made up the face of ROBIN. That look that said he could wade through blood and be just fine. That ice in the form of steel. Raven despised that look; it was good for no one, least of all him. But it was the look she supposed they needed right now. The look that would allow him to work through the infection and hold himself back from destroying Red X.

"Let's go downstairs."

She quietly agreed and followed him out of his room and to the elevator.

When they reached the living room, Red X was already lounging on the couch with his feet on the coffee table, and the other Titans were standing warily by the computer console. Robin had put on his mask before leaving the room, and with the anger she could feel radiating from his body, he was once again the imposing figure that was the source of his magnetism.

Instead of choosing to stand in a brutishly intimidating manner, he chose to sit, quite politely in the chair across the table from the couch that was currently occupied by his enemy, "Red X."

"Robin."

"I'm so glad that you decided to drop by. I feel that this week just hasn't been exciting enough, and you, you make the perfect topper."

"Always glad to please, Bird Brain. You know how I like to please the masses."

Robin smiled, sweetly. It almost scared Raven. "So, I hear you have something you want to discuss. Care to chat."

Again the feeling of a hidden smirk radiated from the seated thief, "Only if you can handle it, I hear you've been whipped a lot lately, I'd hate to tire out your delicate sensibilities."

Raven didn't really see him move, and she wasn't sure she could have stopped him if she had. Before anyone, including Red X was really sure what had happened, Robin had straddled Red X and had an iron fist closed around his throat, surprisingly when he spoke, his voice was calm, "Now, I haven't the slightest what has been circulating among the underbelly of this city, but I do know this, right this second, I feel just about as right as rain. And I also know, that you have information that I want. Now, we can discuss this as two enemies joined together to fight a similar threat, or, I can just squeeze really hard for a while. I think I could probably move on without you. I've had a pretty rough week, I could use the release. What do you think?"

Raven felt fear, not just for the man with his fist around Red X's throat, but of that man. This was why no one ever worried about him. This side of him right here.

Red X was silent.

And Robin; good, tired, Robin, he grinned.


	17. In all this chaos, I found a swing set

The Importance of Secrecy

Chapter 17

Lunatic With a Hero Complex

The livingroom was a graveyard. On one end, the shattered remains of a villain's pride, on the other, the desolated carcass of a hero's restraint.

It was dead air.

With the death of these concepts it seemed that Medusa had taken offense and stared the surreal scene into a living color stone tableau that Raven was sure she couldn't stand much longer. The ever eager Achilles poised to calmly pass the time of day with the latest aspiring warrior; Robin smiling calmly down his own arm at the hand that held hostage Red-X's windpipe. Smiling calmly now, but he would grow impatient.

The Titans, casualties of shock, standing frozen on the outskirts of this metamorphosis, struck dumb by this rage in the guise of rationality. Their leader was not this man. And yet, it was utterly honest that this man only was their leader. And the moments stretched.

Red-X was not a man of subtleties; it was harder for him to accept domination than most men. But he would have to. And everyone in this room knew that. It was just a matter of time, and patience. Robin had plenty of patience, but it would run out eventually.

And that was what everyone was afraid of, because if he got impatient, it would bring up the inevitable and terribly frightening question. Would he actually squeeze?

Would he really have so little trouble taking away a human life, or was he bluffing. There was a fifty/fifty chance, but it was most definitely a chance that they did not want to take. Because if it was the wrong fifty, then the Titans would have a completely different problem to deal with.

Eternity finally got spun off the merry-go-round and Red-X accepted his Beta Status, "Let's talk."

Robin never stopped smiling, "Great choice."

He climbed backwards off of the criminal and Raven was briefly and disturbingly reminded of his retreat in the gym after the loudspeaker had interrupted their hormone storm, his legs and arms all angles trying to get away without touching her inappropriately, and she shivered, whether in memory or fear she wasn't sure. He moved off, and went to the kitchen, getting a glass of water, "Can I get you something to drink, water, tea, soda?"

Squeakily polite.

Red-X's mask looked at the moving Boy Wonder silently for a second, and Raven could almost swear she saw incredulity in that countenance. "Water is fine."

Robin smiled even wider, "Alright, coming up."

He poured two glasses of water and brought them back into the living room. He set Red-X's down on the coffee table and resumed his chair across the way. Red-X didn't touch his water. And Raven supposed he wouldn't. One of Robin's few oversights, the mask in the Red-X costume did not have a mouth hole, it just smoothed over the face, with a little box for speech.

It must have been something he didn't really think about. He'd only expected to be wearing the mask for a few hours a day, he probably hadn't thought he'd need food.

Robin once again settled back and smiled, "Alright, let's hear what dire situation brought you here, into the veritable lion's den."

It was silent for a moment, as though only Red-X were the one that could get them past this final hurdle. And he pulled through, "Believe me, it is most definitely not a small thing. It is in fact, fear for my existence, though now, having experienced your hospitality, I may have made the wrong choice of ally."

Robin smiled, and it was creepily congenial, " I know, we've had rough times you and I, but I think we may be able to help each other, if we can just be patient."

Intimidation was like a pool of water, it changed shape for every person that came into it, and Robin it seemed, had intuition that was spot on. He'd discovered the very method that would make Red-X the most nervous, veiled danger.

Despite her wariness, Raven was impressed.

There was no more witty preamble. "A lot of the smaller criminals, B&E's, muggers, con artist, and a good deal of the homeless, have been disappearing. Also, all over the city, random fields of poppies have been appearing in ally ways. And when people walk in, they don't walk out, as your girls here were about to experience before I showed up."

Raven felt a little of his smugness returning, not a lot, but she supposed enough to let him keep his pride.

"Hmmm."

Robin's only comment for a few moments. And then, he looked up, the white ovals narrowing, "So you, somehow, escaped from the evil poppies. Why did you help no one but Raven and Starfire?"

It had the potential of a dangerous question. And Red-X knew it. He was careful, treading lightly on this thin moral ice, "If I had gotten too close, I thought I might be taken in again myself, and I may not know what's in those crazy flowers, but I'm pretty sure, I do not want to be a part of it."

It seemed logical, and Raven hoped Robin would take it at face value. He did. He smiled, and though it still wasn't genuine, it was much less creepy than before, "Thank you, I'm glad we were able to work around our differences so well."

He stood and gestured the criminal to follow him, "If you happen to have more information that you think would help us stop whatever is going on, you know where to find us." He led Red-X out of the living room and to the elevator, where Raven could only assume he was going down to the lobby, to send him on his way.

When the leader and his enemy had gone, it seemed as if every titan in the room breathed a deep sigh, as though the air were a little easier to breathe.

But nobody commented, choosing to let the silence say what shock they were feeling.

* * *

Raven leaned her head against Robin's headboard, and stared at the ceiling of his room, letting the scratching of his pen numb her brain slightly. He had ascended to the living room about ten minutes after he'd left. And been very pleasant. He had talked a little to the Titans about the possible meanings of this new information. Then he had headed towards the elevator and Raven had noticed the newly refreshed sheen of sweat on his forehead, and the way he was starting to slouch.

So, she'd followed.

It seemed unspoken that both Robin and Raven felt better when Raven was close. It was unclear to both of them why, and Raven was pretty sure it wasn't entirely sexual. It seemed that as she had built a record as being there to piece him together, he was beginning to feel more whole in her presence.

So she was sitting on his bed, as he did everything but sleep. He must be tired, she was almost sure of it. It was late, and he was ill, she'd forced another dose of Keflex on him somewhere in between an electronics project and his dissertation to himself on evil criminals, nemeses and the like. But he still was feverishly; pardon the pun, sawing away at whatever dilemma was facing him now.

She felt something unusual peep its head over her subconscious and it took her a moment to figure out what it was. And then it struck her as a mixture of mischievousness and what she was tentatively sure was desire.

She leaned her head back down and swung her legs off of the bed. She padded softly over to his desk chair, and stared down at the black spikes of hair bobbing in the motions of his writing. He had to know she was there. She would have to make him take notice.

She leaned down and whispered in his ear, "Robin." She kissed his neck right under his ear, and she felt his skin come alive, "Its late," she kissed a little lower and began peeling back the neck of his costume, he let out a muffled, "mmmhmm," and she knew it wouldn't be nearly as hard a struggle as it _appeared_ to be, "and I'm tired," don't mention him. She nuzzled and then bit the muscle around his shoulders, and he made a breathy sound she was positive was not pain.

She had no idea where this was coming from but she wasn't feeling inclined as yet to stop.

"I can't sleep with you working away, and I might not be as sharp tomorrow if I don't get enough sleep," her words were almost unnecessary, as she kissed her way across his back, she could feel him slipping. She tugged his arm softly up and pulled him with her, and towards the bed. He almost resisted and she used her other arm to run her fingers through his hair and untie his mask.

He hummed and she laid him down on the mattress, still whispering things at him that made almost no sense. It felt good somehow, down in her marrow, to be soothing someone down like this, well not just someone, but Robin. It made her feel better, like a part of her was slowly healing up as Robin slowly healed physically.

When Robin was settled on the sheets and nearly comatose, she quickly moved in from the other side, again draping her body around his, holding him a little closer than the night before, but this time sure that he appreciated it, his mind shut down and the last thing she heard before his breathing evened out and he drifted out was his distant childlike mumbling, "mmm, Raven your _warm._" She smiled rather goofily and followed him into slumber, gripping the boy wonder a little tighter.

* * *

She did not wake up in the same way that she did the day previous, there was no lack of warmth. The body she had fallen asleep curled around was definitely still there, black hair tickling her nostrils, and soft snores tickling the air. In fact it was indeed the foreign feel of _contentment _that dragged her softly from sleep. And it felt fantastic.

She marveled that in the midst of all of the insane and chaotic shit that was going on around them, that she could finally find a niche of peace. It was typical of her luck and the luck of the people around her. Things did not happen normally to them. Ever.

The mass against her chest began to shift, and its breathing changed. She heard a slight yawn, and she couldn't help a small smile from touching her mouth. Robin rolled over and looked at her for a moment. He too, seemed to be a little pleasantly befuddled, as if, just like her, he thought this happiness, coming now, was beyond the normal ranges of weirdness that surrounded their everyday lives.

Raven felt as though it were only a moment until she would regain her senses and return to Titanism. It made her sad. And panicky. Before the moment could turn on her, she leaned down and caught his mouth in hers, pressing for a reaction, for more fire, for more feeling. She wanted to always know what he felt like. Always have the memory, no matter what.

He responded after a brief delay and she was delighted. She caught his lower lip in her teeth and nibbled it, leaving it slightly raw and sucked on it to make it feel better and then attacked his mouth with her tongue. By this time, she'd rolled him, and pinned him by his shoulders to the bed and she couldn't make her hands stop roaming. They touched everything, abs, hips, shoulders, face, hair. They were everywhere, trying desperately to complete the sensory memory. Robin's hands came up to her hips, locking just above them and dragging her closer, stilling most of her hand movement and causing her to almost fall on him.

Despite her imminent distraction, she knew that that would not be very pleasant for him. So she still supported herself, but her hair was nearly blinding them both, hanging as it was in front of her face as reached for his soul through his mouth.

This, though it was sudden, and though it felt as if they shouldn't be doing it now, was exactly what she felt her body had been waiting for. This is what they had been heading for in the gym. This is why she felt frustrated every time he tried to disappear behind his mask. This is what she needed.

And she knew that she was not alone. His hands were traveling up to her face, framing her head and pulling her back so he could look at her.

Something on his face was different, not bad, but different. He looked at her for a moment and a strange smile graced his lips and then he pulled her mouth back down onto hers, and laughed. He rolled them over and suddenly he was on top and laughing, and joyous, and….beautiful. Raven found herself laughing back and just letting her body collapse back on the pillow. Robin bent over her and began laughingly placing kisses allover her face.

Finally, he reached her mouth and attacked. He kissed her so hard, she felt compelled to raise up. His tongue pressed askance at her lips and she opened her mouth, letting him in. He plundered, and his hands rose past her chest and past her neck to her back, where he began to unbutton her leotard. She lifter herself a little more to make it easier and reached back to do the same for him.

She finally found the fastenings and began to pull it down over his shoulders, slowly, glorying in every inch of his body that was revealed. She got it down to his waist and let it be for a moment. Meanwhile, he was making his own progress, pulling the leotard down over her arms, laughing lightly when the sleeve tried to stick on her arm.

For the first time ever, Raven was glad that everything she owned, including her undergarments, were dark colored.

He fell to kissing light trails over her stomach, leaving designs swirling around her belly button. She felt desire warring with delight in her stomach and found that the former was winning. Her lower half was growing tight. She jerked his head back up and kissed him, hard, raking her nails down his back, not pressing too hard. His mouth broke away from hers as he gasped. Definitely not in pain. When he looked back down at her, Raven just stared. She'd woken up his own beast, and she could see the lust swirling into his one eye, making it almost black. He attacked her mouth again and began pulling her leotard lower, moving to leave nips and kisses in a fiery trail behind him.

By the time he reached her hipbone, she was breathing rather hard, and having a very hard time focusing on anything but Robin and Robin's wonderful, talented, fantastic mouth.

She felt him stop and opened her eyes, preparing to protest, and found herself staring directly into his eyes. She closed her mouth and waited, his eyes were burning, but he was worried.

He opened his mouth, hesitated, closed it again, and then forged on, "Are you okay, I mean, are you ready?"

He blushed, slightly funny, but Raven didn't laugh. She was still almost a little mad without him touching her, but she understood how much he really did not want to hurt her. She smiled up at him, "Yes," her smiled wilted into a playful scowl, "now keep touching me before I hurt you."

He grinned at her, "Yes ma'm."

He went back to worshiping her hip bones and he began to pull down the black underwear she was wearing. He leaned back up and captured her in a kiss once more. While he was still up there, his hand resumed its actions and Raven gasped as his fingers began their work. Robin just kept kissing her neck.

(edited)

Robin kissed her forehead as she found her breath again. They were both coming slowly back to the world, and oddly enough they didn't really mind it, as long as they were both in the world they were coming back to.

Raven chuckled lightly, "I hope no one was on our floor. I don't think the Titans can take too many more surprises, it might be deadly."

Robin laughed, "I don't think I have the energy to care." He buried his face in her neck, "If they heard something, they'll just have to cope on their own, their leader is currently off-duty and not planning on clocking in anytime soon."

Raven smiled loudly with sheer pride, and raised his head and kissed him soundly, then rolling over and pulling the sheet over her exposed chest and closing her eyes to sleep a little more. She heard Robin chuckle softly and fell asleep as he was draping an arm over her middle.

A/N: For full version, email me or message me. I will do my best to get it to you.

Thank you,

Lunatic with a hero complex


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